Taking the Plunge

[Nicole_P]

Hello everyone-

After years and years of struggling with who I am, and finally going to a therapist and talking things over for a while, and with my doctors blessing, I have decided to go on a low level of estrogen. I have been on spiro for over a year, and was wondering what kind of things I could expect (besides the obvious) from the estrogen. I will be going on .5 mg. (?) and am kind of excited about it. My doctor said I will be much happier. My wife and I are no longer intimant (different bedrooms) but we still love each other a lot, and plan on staying together. I don't plan on transitioning any time soon, but who knows what's ahead. I am a high school teacher, and believe it would be extremely difficult to try and transition in that arena. I guess I would just like some feedback from the gals here who are on a similar path, but are a little further along than I. Any insight you can share would be great! Thanks!

Nicole

[Julie]

If you are on oral medications .5mg is pretty low. I started on 1mg and every two weeks the doctor increased it by an additional 1mg. After two months I was at 4mg and upon a physical examination he increased it to 6mg. He said some of his patients were on as much as 8mg. But I had almost no reaction to orals anyway.

What you can expect is hard to say. I've heard of mood swings and other female-like responses but I never had them. All I ever noticed was changes in the breast. Granted, I do cry a bit more but I've been through a lot of emotional trauma and that could be why.

Give it time. Everyone is different. At the level you're at I doubt you'll experience anything substantial.

[MandyTS]

High School Teacher... hmmm. Same boat here.

Transistioning in the classroom is going to be difficult at best, I understand completly. Personally I am going to transistion into hormones slowly and see where things take me. I am 2 years from tenure and I am in a "no discrimination" state for TG/TS.

What subjects do you teach? What state? I live in CA and teach science (Chemistry and Physics presently, can teach All science and math). It really depends on the hormones too, you are doing pretty much what I am, I will do a low dose for a few years and see how I feel about it then make a transistioning decision in a few years... a good teacher can find work anywhere... remember that.

Mandy

[Nicole_P]

Hi Mandy!

I am a math teacher- this is my 27th year- Ugh! It goes fast.
I have so much to consider while being on this path. My youngest is a freshman in HS and my other two are in college. I too want to take the hormone thing slow. It is at least something I can do that won't be in people's faces, and yet help my psyche cope a little better. This, however, is something I want to really educate people about. If not us, who? If not now, when? Etc....
Thanks for the reply-

Nicole-

Julie

Thank you for replying also. I have followed your story for some time now, and my heart goes out to you. I too have a real problem with the close minded people who think this is a choice. What a crock. Hopefully time will heal.. at least that is my wish to you. Hugs-

Nicole

[Nicole_P]

Hi Gracie~

Thank you for the reply. I am very excited to move on even though it is a bit scary. You have been wonderful all along and I think have posted a reply to every issue I have had. I so appreciate you! I too look forward to hearing about your progress as well. Merry Christmas sweetie!

Nicole

[Julie]

Nicole, there are some very wonderful people here who have been through many different stages of transformation. All you have to do is ask and you will get a reply. If it doesn't happen right away, ask again. We all care but sometimes get too busy and don't see all that's written here.

I'm at a plateau stage right now. I'm not aggressively pursuing transition nor have I abandoned it. Things like work and family are still unresolved. I'm also having a hard time picturing how this male frame of mine will ever look good in a female skin.

I have a friend whom I told I envy. She started out with far less than what I have but has stayed on track and today looks marvelous. It's hard to believe she was born male. She's going in for SRS next month. She has said many times, when I have told her how I envy her drive, that she never had a choice. I have never felt that way. As I see it I do have a choice. Part of me says, "I've made it this far, what's a few more years?" and the other part says, "You've been unhappy all these years why not enjoy a few years of happiness before you go?" Take my kids and grandkids out of the picture and it would be so much easier. I could find a way around the work problem. But when I think about how important my dad was in my life and what it would have been like if he transitioned I just want to walk away from any thoughts of transitioning.

When you love someone enough there is no sacrifice too great. I just have to find a way to lessen the inner turmoil once in a while until I reach that point when I can take a path I know I will stay on.

Good luck on your quest and I hope you find happiness.

[Nicole_P]

Julie~

We do have a lot in common. Being one of the older gals with somewhat gown-up families- (I'm soon to be 50) it seems we have or are going through similar painful situations. I don't post much (as you probably know) but I do read the site everyday, and try and pick out as much wisdom and strength from the group that I can. Thank you for being there. I know if we lived closer to each other we would be very good friends. At least I hope so
You too Gracie!!

Hugs-
Nicole

[Stephenie]

Nicole,
It's nice to hear about an "older" lady who is still willing to try and change her life for the better and not just surrender to life. I too am almost 50 and still trying to figure things out.