Sorry to read about your plight. Breakup of a family is always tough. However, sometimes it is for the best. There has been a constant ripple on this site of pointing out the perceived fault of "not coming clean" with a wife. I have stated in the past that I believe that is nothing more than an out for a woman who truly hates cross dressing. Why does she hate cross dressing is never the issue. It's always cloaked in the deceit issue. The truth of the matter is 99 99/100% of women would prefer that their husband was not a cross dresser. I can accept that. The issue becomes whether or not the wife wants or is able to break from the societal expectations for a marriage and 'manly' behavior.
So, why is Darla hiding the clothes? I've read some threads this week where the guy has hidden his stash in places the wife would never find. It is a common theme on this site. Hide the clothes from the wife. Hide the clothes from the parents. Hide the clothes from a roommate. Why hide the clothes? Because of the perceived reaction from society.
I can understand a person's reaction, if they have nothing more in common than a brief chat or get together once in a while. But, a wife with whom you have forged a life, raised children, built a family together. So, a man likes to dress up. That apparently is reason to toss him aside. The cross dressing, usually done in private, is the sole reason to dissolve the relationship? For some women that is reason enough. The scale of marriage cannot balance because she refuses to accept a 'kink' in the manly armor. Darla's wife can present herself as a woman sitting on a pity pot. I've seen it before in real life.
My wife once asked why I did not tell her of my interest in women's clothing when it progressed past bedroom play. Why? I asked her if she remembered a conversation she had with her cousin concerning the dissolution of an otherwise fine marriage because the wife found out the man was a cross dresser. Horrors! My wife agreed with her cousin that cross dressing was ground for divorce. So, am I suppose to interject with "Hey, I'm a cross dresser, too!" I'm one who does not believe in committing marital suicide.
So, Darla conceals his feminine garb. Would the outcome have changed if he said he wanted some closet space? I doubt it.
I'm in a DADT marriage with implied boundaries. My wife never said I should do this or that. In fact, she told me it was OK with her if I joined a support group. She just does not want anything to do with it. If there has been any strain on our marriage, it is not because I'm a cross dresser. It's because my wife cannot accept it.
I suspect the strain is Darla's marriage is caused by that TOTAL nonacceptance. I suspect Darla, like me,has not been militant and told his wife that he wants to wear a dress and heels in front of her.
If Darla and his wife cannot find a certified therapist in transgender issues to iron out the impasses, it is time to seek counsel of a good divorce attorney.
Am I going off focus or topic on this thread, Ms. Moderator? No, there are several postings on this thread raising the issue of deceit and concealment.