Vietnam and a bad first marriage. Put my early CDing on hiatus until the mid 70s.
Vietnam and a bad first marriage. Put my early CDing on hiatus until the mid 70s.
When writing the next chapter in your life, start with a pencil and eraser - my first page as Miki is full of eraser marks.
In '68 I was 14 and I had a strong infatuation with breasts and wanting to get those pants off a girl but for a different reason and didn't cross my mind to wear them.Now I wear them so as Bob Dylan said "The times They are a Changin'"
In 68 I was...just a youngster... OK I was 12 and still wishing I could wear what the girls were wearing. I had a "secret" stash of my moms cast offs. She is the one who put them in the back of my closet, I think she kinda knew.
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
1967, age 15, first time out and about. My aunt (very Bohemian and with money/kind of a contradiction) fully encouraged my feminine side. Simple outting attired in slacks/blouse with fully on lingerie and simple maryjanes for shoes. Into to NYC for a little fun with Aunt and my older sister. Will always cherish that special day and have not looked back......
I remember 1968 like it was yesterday when all my troubles seemed so far away, the "white" album was released, when RFK was shot,waking up on Christmas morning with the toy, "give a show" projector by Hasbro, and the sonic boom bazooka by Hasbro. Back when I used to talk about the very first Christmas when the tree was all silver, back when I crawled under the house after the blood beatings from my father,back when death was a better deal, back when Tara came into my life and whispered to me for escapism.
But I guess I was lucky, I sort of grew up , er normal, now I'm one of those cross dresser kind of people, but with all the pain of 1968, I wouldn't have missed it for the world. I still stand tall and proud. So many that grew up like me now lay in their graves.
Last edited by Tara D. Rose; 06-05-2013 at 08:18 PM.
'68? I was in Viet Nam. Khe Sanh till April then rice patties till December. USMC 0311.
In 68, I was busy getting ready to be born...
The late 60s were a time of big transition for me.a At age 15,I had my first drink,cigarette,and experience with a girl all between September and Christmas of 69.Things got a little confusing after that,but at least I had just enough sense to say no to drugs,which were the big thing at the time. One of the few things I did like about the 60s were the womens styles,especially hair styles. But at that point in my life I could only be a girl in my fantasies.
In 1969 I was 10 years old and no inkling whatsoever about crossdressing. I did like the dresses and tights that my sisters and the other neighborhood girls were wearing but it wasn't about wanting to wear the clothes. It was more admiration of how lovely the girls all looked. My coming of age was early to mid 1970s. And that's when the dressing up bug bit me!
-Audrey
Hi,
Age 21 was nearing the end of my apprenticship in the building trade, was two years in the cabinat makeing & french polihsing shop. then 4 1 / 2 in the building & joinery. 6 1 / 2 years apprenticship. quite enjoyed most of what i did & still do. timber was my thing. clothes held no interest to myself male or female so was shorts & shurts or tee tops, really did not like clothes yet had to wear something.
Over all i enjoyed my life then & my birthday party. that mum put on for myself, so yes it was good. some really good years,.
...noeleena...
For me, 1966 to 1972 were a wonderful time, and a terrible time, at the same time. In 1966 I was 11 years old. I still didn't have testes, so I looked very feminine. I was the same dress size as my mother, so I could dress up in her clothes. She would even take me shopping and have me help her pick out clothes for her. She usually bought what I liked best. The big give-away, which I didn't realize at the time was that she bought a pair of Go-go boots. She couldn't actually wear them because her right ankle was the size of a grapefruit. She was buying clothes for ME. She would also tie her pantyhose in a loose knot, indicating that I could keep them if I wanted. More and more she was tossing them after one wear, which meant that they didn't have any runs. I did the laundry and washed/folded the clothes. Mom would also mark the clothes that "Didn't fit right anymore", which I could also keep.
At the same time, she didn't want to try and get me support for transition, because it was unknown in those days. The movie about Christine Jorgensen didn't come out until 1970, and Myra Breckenridge came out as a book in 1968, but the movie didn't come out until 1970. I think Mom read the book, maybe because she knew I was transgender.
In the 1960's the "therapy" accepted by most mental health professionals for transsexuals was electro-shock and lobotomy. Mom had first hand experience of this and would have done anything to keep me from having to go through that. Being inter-sexed may have also made her more curious about the book as well. Even I thought, and even hoped that I would never have balls. I even started having really severe cramps, followed by bloody bowels, almost like my body was trying to have periods. They were so painful that I usually work my parents up because I was screaming in pain. It took Darvon to be able to get through them until the laxatives took effect.
By the summer of 1967, they came down. I was very upset. I was still hoping for a miracle. My voice started dropping and I couldn't sing soprano anymore. I buried myself in technology - electronics, ham radio, rocketry, and chemistry. I avoided boys, because they were becoming much more violent. I'd stay in clubs until well after school let out, so I wouldn't get beat up on the way home.
When I was 13, I went on a youth group retreat, and rode with 2 other girls. We had so much fun together that I felt like one of the girls again. We did songs, giggled, and just had a wonderful time together. When we went swimming, they didn't want anything to do with me (because they wanted REAL BOYS). I went to the car, locked myself in, and went to sleep. It was July in New Mexico, with temperatures soaring to 100 degrees out side, and I was in a car that was sitting directly in the sun. I almost died of heat stroke.
That fall, my mom made me go out and socialize with kids my own age, for at least 1 hour a day. I couldn't do homework, ham radio, or read books until I did it. A neighbor boy invited me to his youth group functions. I was already a Christian (sprinkled, dunked, and saved). I finally got into a bible debate with the youth group pastor and ended up being literally thrown out of the group. The kids weren't even allowed to look at me, let alone speak to me. The choir teacher heard me yelling at them and convinced me to audition for her choir. She discovered that I had nearly a 3 octave range, from Low C to A above Middle C. She told me I was a Bass. I wanted to kill myself right then and there.
At this point, I turned to a rowdier group. At 13, I was smoking pot, getting drunk, and taking antihistamines, all at the same time. I started smoking a pipe (easier to switch to pot), and even made my own wine. I even had a still at home. The summer was really bad, and I really began to think I might be an addict. I also tried to kill myself a few times with drug overdoses.
In 9th grade, 1971, I started choir. It gave me a feeling of belonging. I ended up in a show choir as well. I loved the friendships, and loved having these new artistic friends. By February 1972, I had made All City choir and made friends with a bunch of kids from the inner city school. They invited me to some parties, then I invited them to party with some of my friends. I even had my first kiss. I was even invited to some "necking parties". My girlfriend was surprised that I could bring her to orgasm, but even more surprised that I was too ticklish to touch "down there". Eventually she started dating one of my friends, and she introduced me to several of her friends, who all wanted to date me at the same time. I guess that because I was "harmless", and gave a lot of pleasure, I was "safe" and could be shared. In many ways, I was "one of the girls again".
That summer, I got a job and was working a lot of double shifts. I passed out when I let out the dog. When the doctor told me not to drink for 48 hours before the test Monday morning, I thought "Better get really loaded Friday night". As a result, I was incorrectly diagnosed as epileptic (was actually drug detox). It meant I couldn't drive (I would have been the first of my friends to drive), swim (I could swim 100 meters under water), or fly (I was taking ground school and was in aviation club).
I turned to drugs again. I got more popular because when I got really loaded, in combination with my epilepsy drugs, I could match up the boys and girls at a party such that everybody had a good time. I usually blacked out and work up in the coat room, kneeling in front of the bed. Memory did eventually return as I let Debbie out. During the black-outs, Debbie took control, and she was a ****, giving lots orgasms to any girl who wore a skirt and heels to the party.
Debbie had a dangerous side too. She often tried to commit "suicide by Redneck", "suicide by biker", and like. She could be a real bitch and seemed to enjoy verbally castrating men publicly. The lesbian would come out.
Later, my Sophomore year, I did the musical, meeting others in the choirs, theater, and so on. I had studied people since 8th grade, and this made that study more organized and effective. Theater and choir activities also got me out of the drug scene.
Most of the seventies were something I was happy to forget. Fashion was terrible, girls wore "prison shirts" (blue denim), and blue jeans, and "Clutter Boots" (also known as "Waffle Stompers"). Politics was wierd, with Watergate, Ford, and Carter. And the economy was pretty bad as well.
Theater was not only an escape from reality, but I also found out that most of my male friends were gay. I found that I could act "Nellie" and people would accept me as another gay choir-boy. I never quite trusted them with Debbie, and I really wish I could have told them. There were times when all I could think about was how much I wanted to tell them about wanting to be a girl. Something told me that if I told them, they wouldn't want to be my friend anymore. When people would ask me if I was gay, I would laugh and say, "yes, I'm a Lesbian", which was actually true, but they always assumed I was joking with them. When I did show up with a girl-friend (from another school), they were in shock. Then they started talking with her and found out that we weren't "getting it on" and they decided that I probably was gay. I did take that girl to prom. I was a Junior and she was a Senior. After she graduated, she joined the army and I just hung out with the kids who thought I was gay and liked me for it.
From 9th grade to early 12th grade was a crazy roller coaster. There were periods, especially 16 and 17, when I was so suicidal that I would try to kill myself at least twice a week. On the other hand, when I was in a show, I was as happy as I could want to be.
Facebook - Debbie Lawrence
Web - [URL="http://www.debbieballard.org"]DebbieBallard.org{/URL]
See also:
Open4Success
In 1968, I was wearing an olive drab suit, wearing a steel pot, and carrying a rifle. Wasn't thinking anything about cd'ing, just thinking of a hundred ways of staying alive.
Jodi
is this some sort of clever trick to get me to reveal my real age? Not gonna work!
I Was From 6 To 16. I Was A Very Small Boy. Got Caught By Mom Wearing Her Swim SuiT. Got Threatened So I Hid Better. When Playing With My Brothers When Home Alone I Was always The Girl In Moms Clothes. Had A Chance To Visit An Older Female Cousin And Managed To Be Left Alone In Her House All Day. Talk About A Fox In A Henhouse!! Dressed All Day In Everything She Owned And It All Fit Perfectly. Panties, Bras, Blouses, Mini Skirts, Shorts, Shoes, Cheerleading Uniform My Oh My To Have Those Feelings Again! The Fear Of Being Caught, The Drive To Wear Everything. ThE Overwhelming FemiIinity. Mmmmm What Memories. Hugs Riki.
We are very close to the same age. I loved the Psychedelic music that was out in '68! Garage Rock with special effects. I was a novice at getting into my mom and sister's clothes. It was exciting but I was so afraid of getting caught. There were panties, bras, slips and even wigs! I tried on a dress first around 1966. It was '69 or '70 when I told my mom I wish I were a girl.Originally Posted by Cheryl Ann Owens
I often reflect back to a time, probably 1968 when I was 15. I so wanted to go all out to CD but I was very limited. Yes I could put on a pair of my sister's panties and a slip, maybe a dress when I was home alone up to a couple hours after school. I remember studying the beautiful wigs in that thick Montgomery Ward catalog trying to figure out how I could safely order one. NOT! One nice highlight was the impending wedding of one sister. Mom was tailoring another sister's bridesmaids gown and needed me to put it on and stand on a stool so she could do the hem. I SO wanted to keep it on! LOL!
So pick a slice of your life (if you lived the era) and let's hear about it. Even if you weren't from the era, what was your experiences around those teen years?
Cheryl Ann
Ah, to be young again. In 1930, at 5, I had my first experience --- trying on my mom's bra when she left the Mt. Marcy Hotel room in Lake Placid. In 1937 put the black tights I wore in a school play into my locker instead of returning them --- felt so good. By 1941 wore all my mother's clothes and her fur coat to take a night ride in a family car (had my learner's permit) --- only time I was ever "out". By 1968 a whole life of experiences had gone by from a war, through college, to motion pictures in Mexico, to Canada, from coast to coast twice ---all the time taking notes (for future bio) and some of the time collecting and purging (3 or 4 times). By 1968 married and living in New Jersey with my stash in the front of my Volks bug as the engine was in the rear. And in all that time I knew I was some kind of a pervert and the only one like that in the world. Now, alone with a large wardrobe but with many maladies putting my CDing on hold until, I hope, will be able to enjoy them again. Ironic isn't it? So, getting off topic, enjoy while you have health and youth.
This OP just depresses me more, sorry.
Julie
I don't have any specific memories of 1968 because I was only 5 years old, but about 4 or 5 years later was when I first started having the desire to get into the box that was in my Mom's closet that had some of her old clothes. I would try on the mini skirts, blouses and cardigans and then look at myself in the mirror .. all of course when I was alone in the house, which unfortunately was not that often.
Last edited by Rachel Morley; 06-08-2013 at 11:42 AM.
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The River City Gems - Northern California's largest and most active crossdressing & transgender support group!
Was 15,and would wear my sisters clothes any chance I got. Too bad she wasn't a cheerleader,because I wanted to try on one of those outfits in the worst way.
Interesting and very touching bio Julie. Wishing you the best with your health.
worried about the draft and all the boys coming home in a box...soon it would be my time to go
There were no crossdressers in the 60's - we were referred to as transvestites - ick. My playground was my sister's and mother's closets; I had long straight hair which was cool and in style as a guy and needless to say was otherwise perfect. Mini skirts were all the rage - I fondly remember Mary Quant! It was difficult to get out of the house in the middle of the night fully dressed but I did so, so many times. Wish I had then all the make-up and wardrobe skills I've acquired with time - so be it. If I could transport myself back to 1964, and date my theater teacher, I would! I think he may have guessed my inclination to all things girly...
Kay
The late 60's isn't a time to look back to with fondness. Give me the Eisenhower 50's anytime. Anyway, in 1968 I'd been secretly dressing off and on for over 10 years. I was out of the Air Force with my first real civilian job and not much opportunity to dress. During a 3 week business trip I remember having fun styling my hair to look feminine. Had I known all the tricks I've learned since (many from this site) I would have been doing a lot more on those frequent business trips.
Remember it well. The bad part was, like others here, had to deal with the draft so I joined the Navy. The good part was being stationed in Hawaii.
Bodysuits with hip hugger bell bottom jeans....
I was also 15 in '68. It was a real roller coaster ride. There were the wild fun times and also the bad...broken home, identity crisis, out of control behavior, downward spiral into substance abuse. The details are already spread across the posts before mine in this thread.
I just wanted to mention the first thing that came to mind when I saw the thread.....Maidenform's " I Dreamed......" advertising campaign!
Two Spirits
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