Okay..So I am a Cross Dresser.. What next?

[Lucy_Bella]

Is this were you fit in right now? You finally accept the fact you wear clothing made for women..Are you still in doubt ? Do you still have un answered questions about yourself because it has grown to be more than sexy female clothing?...

Been there myself... It's natural to question it and rest assured your are a normal cross dresser ..

Why Lucy ( insert real name here) how can you say that? Easy , as a life time dresser that spent most of my time suppressed I can honestly say "it's not all about the clothing"...The clothing is only the start and yes it grows, oh how it grows!! Starts out small but you build on it and even set "bench marks" ( next time I dress I am going to try this) .. We actually even dare ourselves to advance our dressing desires like Dare Devils we find it exciting to push the limits...But soon even such advancements get boring but they become a must to complete our ventures, they play their part for us to feel complete, but never had in the past.. Why?

That's a damn good question ..I have zero desires to live my life as a woman but I'll be dammed if I have a over whelming desire to look like one, in private,for my own un known reasons..It's just something I feel the need to do and it's not only looking, yeah I want to feel like one ( or know what it's like to feel like one)..Why?

Looking back at all my stages and how they have progressed to date I am not complete, or shall I satisfied until I go all out ( " all out " would be for me ..Hair,eye lashes and sexy clothing) without that and complete it does nothing for me.. So why has it grown to this..? What I have noticed was things have changed from my earlier days of dressing..I have grown from the desire of feeling Femme to looking Femme and in that progression I do things now that emulate a more natural feminine look verses the feel ( although the feel is still there in some aspect it's not as important).. Why?

Because of several reasons...I love the feel of long soft hair on my bare shoulders ,I don't like my face all greasy feeling from the crappy makeup ( I don't use it any more except the eyes and I have changed my soap to soften my facial skin and close my pores ),I don't like the feeling of some Bra around my chest but love the sensation when soft clothing hits the breast area..Explain that? I do not like having bad tasting lip stick on my lips but I like seeing my lips with color and feeling soft( lips gloss)..I love the feeling of soft smooth sexy clothing against my abused and tough skin especially after I wear rough hard material on my body all day in heat that would smoke a Salmon to perfection..

I keep my weight down and take care of myself to fit into sexy little outfits ,I watch what I eat ..I take care of my skin now so I can appreciate the fabric and how it feels..Cross Dressing is really good for me now that I look at it differently ..I can knock ten years off my age and be in great shape because of the force driving it..Yeah I knew I could find a use for it...Doesn't mean I have to like it but if I have to do it I'figure I'll make it useful..

[Sonia_cd]

Thank you for posting this! The conflicting thoughts you have voiced in your post are almost identical to the one's I've been having off late. Is it about the clothing or is the clothing an external manifestation of something internal? If it were just the clothing I should have no desire for makeup, wigs, jewelry, et al. If it were just the clothing, wearing one or more pieces of feminine clothes should satiate the impulse/desire. If it were just the clothing, using perfumes would be unnecessary. Clearly it isn't just about the clothing. So if not, what is it and how far might it go?

Don't get me wrong; I have no desire to be full time nor do I desire men as a woman might a man; and nor is it merely a desire to create an illusion, an art form so to speak - so where does that leave me aside from very confused and very happy all at once

And this leaves me with the nagging question of where it will finally settle? What sort of gender interplay will be the balance? Or will it always be a pendulum that swings erratically between stereotypical conformity with gender roles; one in public and one in private?

I hear you girl and if you have an insight into your own feelings that might benefit us all, please continue sharing.

xoxo...Sonia

[Beverley Sims]

Just remember what ever you achieve out of crossdressing, it is a healthy and mostly gratifying past time.

You are still finding your own limits, likes and dislikes to your own little phenomenon.
It will come to you one day in a blinding flash.
For now don't overthink, overanalyse, just enjoy what you have been doing, and keep on doing it.

[UNDERDRESSER]

It's interesting to read posts like this, not because there is much resonance with my own point of view, but because it clarifies what I'm not, and thus, narrows the answer to the question, "What am I?"

I also am more conscious of keeping myself in shape, and that's partly to do with how I can wear certain items, I actually now use more skin products and the like, because again, how I look is becoming more important to me.

I still feel a sexual component to it, though that shrinks all the time, and the reason for the sexual stimulation is changing. I find it gratifying that my GF finds me attractive, and likes my legs displayed in stockings, ( she loves, and is jealous of, the muscle definition ) A majority of the stimulation is that I can think of myself as sexy in some items of female attire. Not a sexy woman, specifically, but a sexy human.

I am becoming more and more sensitive to comfort aspects of clothes, and because of that, the technical performance of the fabrics. Seamless underwear, breathable fabrics, soft shell outer layers when the weather is less than Summery, that and fit, even of stuff that is not body fit. Suggesting and enhancing the best parts of my physique. "Comfort" physically, and emotionally. I am getting very good at wearing stuff that feels physically good, and learning to be more relaxed, and emotionally comfortable.

To me, it's about displaying my comfort and happiness with myself, about seeking approval and compliments, being seen as attractive, about NOT displaying typical male macho attitudes.

[Nicole Erin]

So you are a CD. "Now what?" is this -
live life

[Jaylyn]

I really have no desire to become a woman, but do have a desire to feel like one. Guess for right now the clothes and makeup is doing that for me. I do stay in shape more. A big plus. Wife knows and she approves and helps. This has made our marriage closer as she feels that it was a deep secret and I shared it with her and trust her to keep it our secret. It is comforting to me to know she has got my back. Another big plus. Where will this journey lead? Who knows? I just love it and being me. Lucy guess I will also like you make it as useful as it can be. Enjoyed reading your post. So I am a cross dresser.

[Edyta_C]

I think that for some of us, there is a thrill or adrenalin rush that comes with pushing the envelope more and more. Then it seems to want to push one to go out for more thrills. It is not a sexual thing just the rush that you get. I think that for a few especially early on there maybe a sexual component, but I think it more about a rush. I also think that for others, it is a soothing mellowing feeling being able to wrap one's self in the femme.

Hugs Edy

[Kristy 56]

Edy. I'm with you on this. Just coming back from a purge but know it'll start out simple,followed by more and pushing the envelope. Lucy, nice thing about this forum is that you'll find out that you're not alone.

[bobbimo]

Thanks Lucy
Very well presented.
I guess we all have similar thoughts when we first feel the feminine cloth.
I've learned its an artistic thing for me. Some days I feel like the male slob, and dont shave, a tee shirt and shorts are good enough for today or the next few days.
But then the light enters me and the beautiful dresses call to me. Its a labor of love to un scruff the man and see if you can make it look like a woman.
Its not often that I will just wear a sundress and no other femme details. Once I start its the bra, forms, panties and then to pick the right outfit for my mood.
At least I have to do mascara and lipstick for makeup, and I like to do up my hair but usually brush it back and let it dry naturally.
Whats next? Well I still have a part of my dream, where I go out into the world, running to the mall with credit card raised on high with my wife for a fun day of shopping.
It would wonderful to have a make over, and enjoy walking the world as Bobbi, shopping, dining, dancing, and just knowing that nice feeling that your inside and outside match.
Bobbi

[slamddoger]

so what next so what your next thing that you are go to do next

[NicoleScott]

Many GG's don't like the look and/or feel of makeup, so they don't wear any. And some never wear dresses, pantyhose, shapewear, or high heels.
Crossdressing isn't about feeling like you have to do something because others do, it's about doing what we like.
And, many of us really like the dresses, pantyhose, shapewear, and high heels.
We all do this for our own personal reasons.

[Brynna M]

What and why are two different things. It seems like you have pretty good handle on what you are and what you want. Your questions seems to be more about why you want it. I can share that sentiment. But i'm coming to the conclusion that why is practically speaking irrelevant. I have an impulse to crossdress that is. And it is not going away. The only question is what do I do about it. I still haven't figured that out. Why is a philosophical question for pondering over wine and sushi. "Why" is worth while yes but not worth any distress over.

[Lucy_Bella]

Why is a philosophical question for pondering over wine and sushi. "Why" is worth while yes but not worth any distress over.

So true, and this is the feeling of acceptance for myself...I know who I am ,I know why I do it and I know where it's taking me.. That's a feeling worth expressing