Need Advice - Ref: New Employment Start Fresh and Transition - Thank you!!

[Jordie]

Hello dear friends,

As I continue with this transition process in order to live a much more authentic, peaceful and happier existence. I find myself in the middle of a situation where I need to make a final decision and I just needed some advice.
I have all my government documents changed about two months ago and they all show the proper gender marker. I am very happy and satisfied for that. I am done with all DMV, Court name changes, social security and all that "good stuff"!.

Lately I have been doing some research in regards to finding new employment and I have contacted this recruiter in NYC ( I live in Queens NY) and provided him all my information and proper resume. I do have a Senior Management Position in my current company and the job is really, really flexible schedule wise. I have been working for them for over 14 years. I do work from home 90% of the time and I only need to go to main office and sporadic meetings of about three hours a couple of times a week. The rest I can work whenever I want, provided there is an internet connection. (I love libraries, Starbucks and Panera bread places, they all have wifi). Unfortunately my current job will not be the right environment to transition and though I know others who have done it in the same industry (Construction Management), my company is simply the wrong company to transition. The question I have is that if I get a new job to start fresh and as a female, once I get the offer, the new employer will probably call my previous office and find out about my male persona, also, I am afraid once they run a background check (that is if they do it), they might find that I had a male name recently changed. Am I wrong? Can you please input your experience or advise as per how can I do this in the most confidential manner? Do you think I have to disclosure my trans status to the new potential employer?
Some of you will still insist to try to transition in my company, I don’t mean to be rude, but please that is out of the case, believe me, I tried, so don’t waste your time providing this kind of input. I want to know safe ways to transition to new companies without much history disclosure.
You advise and proper input is highly appreciated.

[Angela Campbell]

I have wondered the same thing. All the reference jobs on a resume will have the previous male name and the companies will not know about the change so how can you provide references of experience? I would guess that if all the experience is with your present company if you change your name and all with them then they will have records under your current name. Companies usually do not give much more info about an employee other than the dates of the time period worked and whether they gave a notice when they left. I doubt they would mention a transition. If this is impossible with your current company I also await to hear what some others may be able to tell us.

Ellen

[Badtranny]

There is no easy way.

Your past isn't far enough in the past for it not to come up in pretty much every instance through the process. If you don't want to transition at your current job, then transition at the next one, but there is no way to avoid the transition that I'm aware of. This is what I keep talking about, it's a public experience. At some point you're going to have to own it.

Haven't you spent a lifetime running already? Aren't you tired of being ashamed yet?

I wish you the best, but I wish you courage first.

[AllieSF]

I think that you should start your transition where you are currently employed. You already have a good job, they legally cannot fire you for transitioning (I know they can find some other reason), and you will have your current income while you look for a new company. If you have or will legally change your name during that period, your records should at least carry the correct name, maybe with an asterisk mentioning the previous name, "*previously known as ...." . That notation may also show up in your credit reports too. While doing that and seeing how it goes, you can also be looking for that next job, that may, or may not, be required sooner rather than later. Depending on your age, you may also want to change your legal name on your college transcripts if that is possible so that someone checking will also see your correct name there too.

Now, as some say here, starting a new life with a new job and maybe even a new location works for some. However, you have special talents, the industry and professional workers are somewhat small in size (I worked in construction/project management with very large companies most of my professional life). That being said, truly hiding your previous identity and gender may be somewhat difficult. You need to be ready for someone, like your new employer, or old one for that matter, to eventually find out. You can only change your personal history so much and a transitioning male in that industry may make for some interesting gossip. I will let others here who have or are transitioning to add the "Just own it" comments. I wish you the best of luck.

[Gerrijerry]

As a person who has gone through what you are asking about. You really have nothing else you can do with the new company. You will need to go to the personal office and tell them that you transitioned so that they can if they want to get a work history from your old name. The new company BY LAW will not tell anyone that you have transitioned in the new company. It really is no big deal in NEW YORK City. That is where I transitioned also. I was treated like any other woman. The only difference between us is that I stayed in the same company just changed departments to where I was not known. It was a large company that I worked for. Enjoy your new life. I was finally at peace with myself. When I retired last year I moved to another state and have never had any problems. I just blend in with the other woman.

[Kimberly Kael]

Two possibilities leap to mind. As Gerrijerry mentioned above, it's not necessarily a bad idea to let the recruiter at the company you're applying to know about your trans history. This reduces any concern that somewhere down the line, someone will find out and jeopardize your position. The HR department in any large company exists largely to protect their employer from legal action, so they'll know your medical history is (a) confidential, and (b) not something that can be used to make hiring decisions.

The other possibility is to contact prior employers and ask them to change their records. You'll be dealing with the HR department so the same general rules apply. Just because you wouldn't feel comfortable transitioning there doesn't mean they can't act professionally in other ways. When I transitioned, I came out to as many former colleagues as I could find in order to simplify future conversations along these lines.

When I embarked on my last job search, the advice I got was almost invariably of the "hide your past" variety. Instead I ran the risk of putting myself out there, nothing glaringly obvious on my résumé but knowing that it would be easy enough to discover. Much to my surprise, it was the people who DID know my history that I found most interested. I eventually wound up with offers from three employers, all of whom knew my trans history. It's not always necessary to take a stealth approach, depending on your industry and skills.

[Janice Ashton]

Hi Jordie

If it was me making an application for new employment I would commence my CV with a heading paragraph such as:

Please see my formal Curriculum Vitae presented to you in my new name (enter here your new female name) previously known prior to my gender reassignment as (enter here your old male name).
I am hopeful your company may extend to me the courtesy and confidentiality my application may receive.
If I were to be considered for an interview with a view to employment, the task of researching my employment record with past employers under my previous name may cause some confusion? Therefore I would be most grateful of an understanding of my present gender and that my skills and work experience are at the forefront of your enquiries.
Thank you for your understanding relating to my application.


Not sure if this may help but it could be a start?

[Amy07]

Jordie, what matters is the work that you have done in the past. Seems to me you are successful in your projects, so do you best to push that forward. You make the company profits! Your gender should not matter at all. And, if you change jobs, you take what you know about the other company to the new one. In heels!

[KellyJameson]

I'm not sure about construction management but I recently started sending out resumes to companies in my field who hold federal contracts.

The government tries to encourage minority hiring and strongly discourages discrimination and I'm hoping this works to my advantage.

At practically all levels of government from city, county, state all the way to the federal level construction projects are given to companies partly based on compliance.

Find out who these contractors are and apply to them.

[Kimberly Kael]

If it was me making an application for new employment I would commence my CV with a heading paragraph such as...

There's a fine line between being open and honest, and giving the impression that your transition is going to be a distraction from the job you're applying for. They want you focused on the job, so your résumé should reflect a focus on what matters to them. If you make a big deal of your gender identity then you give them an opening to perceive it as an issue. YMMV, of course, but I tried to acknowledge the fact in passing instead of opening with it.

[CharleneT]

If your current employer hasn't already had a problem, why are you assuming they will when things progress farther ? You have a lot of time in with them, I'd try and stay there.

As for the "history/herstory" problem, there is no solution. The internet makes it a rather simple affair to find out about name changes. Seriously, a $5 search will turn up the name change and why. But ... if you are valuable to the company, chances are good they will not care.