"Vaginas are overrated!"

[DebbieL]

I suspect that your friend was trying to tell you that she could accept you as a woman whether you had one or not. For those of us who have wanted one all our lives, it's nearly impossible for us to even consider going through all the steps of transition then not completing the process. However, to a woman who has had one all her life, and may even be a bit of a tom-boy, it's just how things are. She might even wish she had your equipment.

As for difficulty achieving orgasm, that starts long before SRS. The testosterone blocker tends to make it nearly impossible to have erections, and certainly nothing useful for intercourse. It's still possible, with the right kinds of stimulation mentally, physically, and emotionally, to have orgasms, but it takes a while to get used to not ejaculating. Eventually you dry up and can only have dry orgasms.

There are some who remain she-males, often for financial reasons. Back in the 1980s, they could do the vaginoplasty, but the clitoris was purely cosmetic and non-functional. I remember seeing "Sulka's Wedding" and realizing that she did not have a clitoris. I saw an interview with Shannon where she discussed her transition. In those early days, they would not knock you out completely, because they needed to figure out how to connect the nerves correctly. Apparently, it was extremely painful, and the recovery took much longer than it does now. As surgical techniques have improved, so have the options and the quality of the finished product. There is still a painful recovery period, and after-care can be painful at first, but it seems to be worth it.

[PaulaQ]

"Only thing I ever prayed for that I got."

My friend is just a gem. Aside from a restaurant, she owns a clothing store. She wants me to come shopping in there next weekend. She and my waitress (who also works in the clothing store), were already thinking about stuff to put me in.

And I think Debbie L's observation about her is spot on. She said very much the same thing tonight.

[Jorja]

Paula, I think you had better watch out for your credit card balance.

[PaulaQ]

Jorja - tell me about it. Sephora killed me today. That look of "we love you!" is so close to the look of "we want your money", idn't it?

[Debglam]

Think different sized dildos....

http://www.vaginismus.com/products/dilator_set

Oh my!

Too short reply yada yada yada. . .

[Michelle.M]

Think different sized dildos....

http://www.vaginismus.com/products/dilator_set

Oh my!

You have no idea. That big one is like having a baseball bat stuck in your hoo-hah.

[PaulaQ]

I just use my boyfriend who has a very active imagination and who pays strict attention to details.
...
You have no idea. That big one is like having a baseball bat stuck in your hoo-hah.

One could draw inferences about certain features of your boyfriend? Ultimately though, as long as "tab A" fits into "slot B", it's all good...

Just sayin'...

[whowhatwhen]

Why use a dilator set when you have everything you need at your local farmer's market?


*runs*

[Beth-Lock]

Yes. The grass just seems greener. Dilations, (always remember to call them 'exercises' or something, in public, as Frances posted once), are just one part of the high maintenance, more complex female body thing.

I suspect that your friend was trying to tell you that she could accept you as a woman whether you had one or not. For those of us who have wanted one all our lives, it's nearly impossible for us to even consider going through all the steps of transition then not completing the process. ...

You can opt to get the vulva without vagina.

There are some who remain she-males....

This is usually because they feel that sex with male equipment is better.

In those early days, they would not knock you out completely, because they needed to figure out how to connect the nerves correctly. Apparently, it was extremely painful, and the recovery took much longer than it does now. As surgical techniques have improved, so have the options and the quality of the finished product. There is still a painful recovery period ...

Pain never bothered me much ... I was lucky. Medical techniques have greatly improved. But for one moment, the evening after the op, I screamed in pain, the only time I have screamed as a adult. No big deal though. Sort of makes a funny story in retrospect. Women do scream in childbirth too. But I do not feel so good down there, just naggingly uncomfortable, a year after op. I hear from my (private) coach, that there are many cases of probs after SRS, some involving complete failures of sex change. It is definitely not without risks. As a result, the opinions expressed will vary, some have had a good experience with SRS, others not so good, and for others, it solved nothing, and they are still dysphoric/suicidal/depressed/financially wiped out, and so on. What you say, depends on what your personal experience has been.

Why use a dilator set when you have everything you need at your local farmer's market?

They could have designed the dilators better too, but as with the veggies, it would create a likelihood of infection. For about six months after SRS you are very, very vulnerable to infection down there. Even when you use a public rest room, take out your sterilizing wipes and go to work, before you sit down. That was what I was taught.

[donnalee]

How many times have you read that "present" already?

I did read the original (English translation - Illustrated) some years ago, but age and an inherently inflexible body have limited any practical application in most cases.

[Serana]

Maybe I can get my son to illustrate "Aunt Paula's Big Happy How-to Book for Trans-Vagina's (a post-op pop-up book)," or would that be wrong?

If you can get another hyphen in there you're onto a winner.

[Marleena]

This calls for the "vagina is 8 miles wide song".

Mods I hope it's okay to post or I'll take my spanking.

*Mod note* Search you tube - link not allowed by our rules

[TeresaCD]

I like that someone where you live, values the person that you are.
And that's special

[linda allen]

Dilation is once a week for 20 minutes for the rest of your life, not several times a day.

If I knew what "dialation" actually meant (to a MTF), this would be a lot more clear. I have an idea, but nothing more.

[MysticLady]

I would love it if HRT made mine even smaller, or if by magic it disappeared, but in the meantime the cost/benefit of owning a vagina does not add up.

The Words of a...............Savy Business Woman

[linda allen]

I wish you were here and I could show you my set of four dilators, (progressively wider), in basically a show and tell, though after show most people do not need to be told much. They are solid plastic and look like very simple dildos. They are inserted into the vagina to a depth of about 5 1/2 inches, (the full depth of the surgically created vagina), and held there for about 5-20 minutes each, according to the specific, printed instructions you have been given. You lie on your back in bed, knees bent and pointed skyward, a hand mirror in your other hand, to see what you are doing down there. You are given a specific schedule for how many to use and which sizes, and how long for each, plus how many times a day, by the hospital. The purpose is to keep the vaginal vault, (cavity) from closing.

Thank you. It's kind of what I thought but thanks for the details. I can see where that could be pretty inconvenient, especially if you're working or travelling.

[kellycan27]

Slightly off topic, but do you get an instruction manual when you get one? I'd definitely want to be sure I used mine properly!

There are apparently instruction manuals for girls. My wife went through a book with my niece as my niece hit puberty "You and Your Vagina". It had a page with instructions to get a mirror, so you could look at your vagina. My wife was really embarrassed by the book, and especially that page. Seems like something like that for us would be real useful. Especially if it had friendly somewhat pastel tinted illustrations.

There are some things that they don't tell you like... Water can get up there whilst swimming and it comes back out at the most inopportune times.... a cough or sneeze can cause you to wet your pants slightly. LOL

No naked sky- diving cause you're liable to whistle on the way down. ( ok... I made that one up)

[MysticLady]

No naked sky- diving cause you're liable to whistle on the way down. ( ok... I made that one up)

...................

[whowhatwhen]

Is the depth of the vagina related to the size of the existing penis?
Neat stuff those things seem, but then again I've not seen one in the wild either.

[Frances]

^Regarding Depth. Yes and no. Donnor material (penis and scrotum skin) has something to do with it, but also pelvis size and width. The skin used is stretched out.

Even if an apendage looks small, there may be enough donnor material anyway. In extreme cases, skin from the thigh can be used. Some surgeons use a portion of the colon.

[linda allen]

................. No naked sky- diving cause you're liable to whistle on the way down. ( ok... I made that one up)

You didn't make that up, I heard that one in junior high school.

[Sejd]

Seems to me like an impossible question. I have two trans girlfriends. They both had the sex change operation. One told me that if she had known how it would feel to get old, she would never had gone through it. The other one just had her operation last year and although she had high hopes it would change everything, it did not change her situation at all and now she has to deal with the medical cost. Personally, I never think about my penis as a male thing and I always have sex imagining I am a woman. That leads me to think that we are all different. For me it just seem to work out fine in my head, for others it doesn't. So there you go. Is it the solution or is it not? I guess it is a very personal decision which cannot be decided as an either or.

[kellycan27]

I don't think anyone can judge whether or not having a vagina is overrated unless they have lived with both sides of the issue. Anything else IMHO is speculation. Personally my intention for SRS was two fold. I wanted congruence, and I wanted to someday marry and have a family. Both have come to fruition and I couldn't be happier!
"I've got a band new pair of roller skates.. You got a brand new key, I think we should get together and try them out you see"!

Linda

Every party needs a pooper... That's why we invited you!

[PaulaQ]

Personally my intention for SRS was two fold. I wanted congruence, and I wanted to someday marry and have a family. Both have come to fruition and I couldn't be happier!

I guess I'm only wanting a vagina for congruence. Who knows if I'll ever even use it for anything? Right now, my libido == 0. Hoping to have one again, of some sort, one day.

[whowhatwhen]

I'm just speculating but the best thing about a vagina would be that it's not a penis.