No axe to grind or point to be made here mods, but I wonder how many of our forum users would just LOVE to be able to join the FAB section? I know I would - but that´s probably because I´m more comfortable around women anyway!
No axe to grind or point to be made here mods, but I wonder how many of our forum users would just LOVE to be able to join the FAB section? I know I would - but that´s probably because I´m more comfortable around women anyway!
If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got!
Nosey!!!
I can certainly see why many would like to be able to join, even if only to be able to read the posts in the FAB section. Would enable many to get a better understanding of what their wives/girlfriends are thinking. Maybe those who have wives/girlfriends who are also members allow them to read the posts in that section. It wouldn't so much help me though, as a gay man my partner isn't "female at birth". Hmmm, maybe a GAB (gay-at-birth) "hidden" section for the partners of gay crossdressers... I jest, there's probably just not the demand for such a section at all!
One thing I did think about reading another post today, is that once joined, we can't delete our own profiles. I wonder if this applies to the GG's on this site. And if it does, whether that puts off some GG's from joining. It's different for us CD's (etc), as this is a lifelong situation for us, but for women that isn't the case - for example a relationship with a crossdresser may end, and so they no longer have (or desire to have) any connection to this "community".
Another thing I wondered, is how many posters who identify themselves as "female at birth" are actually men. A common thing to occur on online forums directed solely at women. I hope that for this site, the answer to that is very few, and it most probably is. Dual accounts (sock-accounts) are easier to trace these days (IP addresses being one way I know about).
I respect that this forum has very strict segregation regarding who can post where, but having been a member a somewhat more open transgender support forum (the speaking of its name may be frowned upon here, I don't know) where the users are encouraged to mingle, it feels a tad restrictive. As Jenni says, it would allow for better dialogue between the two camps, and less of an enforced divide.
There is the MtF section where anyone can post and discuss things. What you need to realize (and after being here awhile you will see it happen in the MtF boards) is the GG's tend to be targets for angry TGs. The FAB board would not be a safe place for the GGs if CDs were even allowed to read what they post. Sure we would all like to read what others are saying about us but you know that the responses often get a little hot and off topic.
FAB should remain GG and SO only. The rest of the board members will have to live with the lack of knowing. In all the years I have been here the "dialogue" on CD topics has never been civil. In fact I think it drives GGs away because they see that they are a minority here. So many times I have seen a GG try and pour their soul out on the MtF boards only to get slammed by members, especially when they are still working through the shock of discovery.
No, I like that this forum has places where some can go where the general membership cannot bring in cyberbombs.. Safe Haven, The GM forum, Religion and FAB have to stay cloistered so people can freely express themselves. If GG/SO wants the opinion of the general membership, they can ask in MtF or Loved ones.
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
A person should wear what he likes to. And not just what other folks say. A person should be who she likes to. A person's a person that way!
~Marlo Thomas~
In my not so humble opinion, all of the GG's who join crossdressers.com have already proved themselves to be extraordinary people because instead of running for the proverbial hills when they find their partner is a cross-dresser or is transsexual, they come to this site to learn and also to see what they can contribute.
There are plenty of places where everyone can mingle on this site. This forum being a good example, also Loved Ones, the Lounge, Media and the Transsexual Forums to name but a few. Why do you begrudge the GG's a safe place to discuss with other equally outstanding women?
As far as I know, there are very strict checks to prevent men gaining access to FAB and equally stringent penalties for anyone found to be cheating on the rules of that forum.
I find that there is already quite good dialogue via places like Loved Ones and most people in this part of the site are even happy to let a TS like me join in.
I think that it is healthy that, in addition to the open forums, we have a few spaces where people can discuss things in a little more confidence (e.g. the GM forum for MtF cross-dressers).
Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.
This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any
Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist
Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity
I will say this much....my wife loves the FAB forum....her responses there to a question have been better than they were here
With all due respect, we are all adults here. Sitting at our computer screen, it's as safe as it can get (in the context that we're talking about). We all know enough about the internet, about how anonymity can bring out the worst in some people, and we all know that the best thing to do is not to respond to such "angry" people and just to take what they say with a pinch of proverbial salt.
Having said that, I actually think it's a good idea to have a female only section, and I applaud this site (the administrators, and the moderators) for making that work. I would imagine that there will be a number of women who, upon finding out that their partner is a CD, does want to learn more about it, does want to speak freely with other people (women) in the same situation, without being (for want of a better word) bombarded with posts by CD's who can themselves only ever really offer the perspective of another man's point of view. For such women, it isn't another man's point of view that they may be looking for, but the point of view of a woman's who's in a similar situation to themselves. That, and that alone, is reason enough to justify having such a section on this site.
Sort of defeats the purpose.
I know that maybe shortly before I joined here, there were some "posers" in the FAB section who were eventually exposed. This is why they began the verification phone call. The GG's really need a place to talk freely. We have plenty of sub sections we can discuss things in.
Second star to the right and straight on till morning
FAB is also a place where a GG whose spouse is on the forum can ask questions or work through her feelings without hurting the feelings of her spouse. She may desperately want to be in an accepting place, but if she can't express those doubts and fears without starting an argument, or destroying what little confidence her spouse may have built up, then it isn't helping the situation. I think that honesty is important, but I think it is also important to have a safe place to express those fears, or even to vent some frustration without feeling like one is going to be questioned by their spouse about those feelings. GM and FAB along with the other private forums serve an important purpose.
If you are a Genetic Female (Female at Birth) and would like to join us in the F.A.B. Forum, please follow the link.
F.A.B. Forum Access
In FAB? Me? Heck no. I'd rather not know or intrude.
Not me I respect the GG's here too much.
I value the input of GG's.
And I like that there are forums only for some. Too bad there isn't one only for MtF CDers.
Hi Amanda, Be careful what you wish for you may not like what you see , I don't want any parts of the FABs' forum.
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
Just so we are clear, the F.A.B. section will only be open for GG's
Administrator
Missing my Libra babe Sherlyn, I hope she's rocking up there with the angels
Missing our Rianna, doesn't seem right, gone to early, hope she's partying with Sherlyn
Sometimes I think we should be restricted to a CD only forum to protect us from ourselves.
I sometimes go to other forums for a visit, make a comment and just get tarred and feathered.
Does not go well with my new dress.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
The FAB wouldn't be so FAB if we where allowed in, we're not the only ones that need a place to talk. Wives, and girl friends are let in to our world, and then most of the time they are asked to keep our secret. So now we have them to talk to, but who do they have. We come here so we can talk openly about things we can't or won't talk about anywhere else, well they need that too. I'm sure there are ladies trying to understand their man, and they have questions, some they might not want to ask in front of their husband. I wouldn't want to be the one to Deny them that chance, I'm just glad they have come here looking for answers. there are a lot of places out there I wouldn't want my wife looking for the answers, because those sites don't represent me.
Magic is the art of changing consciousness at will.
Trust me. You would rather have your wives on the F.A.B forum here than on some of the other CDing sites that are just for wives. F.A.B is a place where we can discuss anything and everything with the security of knowing we wont be judged or whatever. This is the safest and most welcoming place for GG's/SO's of CDer on the internet. If it didn't exist your wives would have to join "the other site" that promotes breaking it off and running when you can. :/
Let me make it clear that I am NOT advocating that non GGs should have access to their most valuable part of the forum. I would NOT want to change that at all. Maybe I´m just nosey. Please read the heading of the post.
If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got!