I'm in total agreement. Why do the CDers who dress for sex feel as if they are being judged negatively? It is what it is, and as Lori points out, just about everyone starts off that way.
Why does the term "fetish" (the non-talisman meaning) or 'fetishistic crossdressing' get people in a dander? I think it is because many of the members here also dress for other reasons than self-gratification, even if they occasionally still indulge in auto-eroticism. They enjoy being feminine. They enjoy the clothes. They enjoy being perceived as feminine. Some may even have developed a feminine identity.
Barring the transsexuals (which would be a different thread), do the CDers who started out sexually and who hate the term 'fetish' now prefer to believe that they were born with a propensity for femininity? Or is it because 'fetish' has been pathologised for many years, even if now this has changed? Or is it for deeper reasons - maybe there is a collective distaste rooted in our reptilian brains for any type of sex that is not designed for the survival of our species, which makes the idea of someone being solely aroused by the self, by an object, or by a situation seem as if he or she shouldn't be?
At any rate, fetish is not a dirty word in my book. It only becomes problematic when in very rare cases, it goes overboard and has a negative impact on a person's concentration, work, relationships, and/or socialization.
