A little dose of reality

[kimdl93]

For the past few weeks I've been staying in an RV park...figured it was cheaper than paying for motels while I work out of town. A couple of evenings I've taken walks around the park, just to get some exercise. I was always dressed properly, but it seems I've attracted more attention than I wanted.

This evening I took what has grown to be my usual stroll and just as I was approaching my RV a car sped up and a spotlight shown on me. It was clearly a patrol car. Needless to say, my thoughts were "Oh God, now what?" The officer instructed me to "get over here" and proceeded to ask why I was walking around the RV park at night, dressed like a woman. I explained that I just was out getting some exercise.

He then went to explain that some people had complained that a man was walking around dressed like a woman...checked my ID and again asked my why I did this. To that I could only respond it was a long story, that goes back to my earliest years. I added that I didn't think I was doing anything wrong, but certainly didn't want to offend anyone.

After checking my vehicle registration he went on to say that if people called in the future the police dept wouldn't bother me.

Well, I'm left feeling a bit discouraged. This is the very first unpleasant incident I've ever experienced and the world, at least for the moment, feels a good deal less accepting. I suppose the bright side is that the officer acknowledged that I hadn't done anything wrong.

Much as I hate to, I'm afraid I'll be confining myself while I'm here. I really don't want to offend or upset the other folks here - most of whom are older folks and probably not particularly open minded.

[Marleena]

Sheesh that really does suck! Good thing the police won't be bothering you anymore. You're probably better off going the motel route next time. Some people could easily have been "one people" though. All it takes is one to cause trouble for you.

[ArleneRaquel]

OMG ! Good Luck & Best Wishes darlin.

[suchacutie]

I guess I don't understand. If you are walking around after dark or near that time it would seem that someone would really have to go out of their way to clock you and then have the nerve to call the police. Rather amazing!

[MysticLady]

Much as I hate to, I'm afraid I'll be confining myself while I'm here. I really don't want to offend or upset the other folks here - most of whom are older folks and probably not particularly open minded.

I'm sorry too hear of your troubles Kim. You're right though, sometimes for others sake, we must not be ourselves, unfortunately.

. Some people could easily have been "one people" though. All it takes is one to cause trouble for you.

So True, it only takes one too ruin things

[arbon]

Your the one that should be offended!! Don't worry about those idiots you have the right to be you and dress as you like

[ReineD]

Well, I'm left feeling a bit discouraged. This is the very first unpleasant incident I've ever experienced and the world, at least for the moment, feels a good deal less accepting. I suppose the bright side is that the officer acknowledged that I hadn't done anything wrong.

Much as I hate to, I'm afraid I'll be confining myself while I'm here. I really don't want to offend or upset the other folks here - most of whom are older folks and probably not particularly open minded.

People fear what they're not familiar with, Kim. And most people, unless they've met a transperson directly, don't know anything other than the stereotypes. I'd bet my bottom dollar that if there was a block party where you had a chance to meet everyone, they'd immediately know that you're OK and no one would have called the police.

So it's not you, Kim ... it's the stupid stereotypes and people's ignorance. I wouldn't stay in from now on. You have the police dept's backing, so I'd go out there again and say hi to the neighbors if they're outside. Introduce yourself and say that you're there for a few weeks on business. Engage them in a bit of chit chat. And then all the mystery will be dispelled.



Also, don't forget. Only one or two people called the police. Not the entire community.

[AllieSF]

Sorry to hear that Kim. I think that the good thing is that your RV park seems to have good security services and the second is that the cops now will not bother you. Other than that, I agree with Arbon, that you should not feel sorry how those other residents think, unless there is some danger in them getting upset, like younger macho men and their biker babes. If most are of the much older generation, kinda like me, then I would just live your temporary life there as you have been doing, which is not bothering anybody by being obnoxious, loud or whatever, and take your walks, sit outside enjoy the evenings, and whatever else you like to do. They really need to learn how to live with your presence and not insisting that you acquiesce to their fears. Good luck.

[Di]

My heart sank when I read this....I am so sorry
Reine is right, it is because people are afraid of what they do not know.
Sucks but please do not take it to heart.

[abigailf]

Sounds like you handled yourself perfectly with the police. As far as anyone else goes, if you are not afraid for your safety then go out. If someone is offended that is their problem. If they ask you about it, then educated them.

Don't be discouraged. That actually sounded like a positive story though I am sure you were a bit nerve racked. The fact that the police recognized the situation is a good thing.

[TheMissus]

I think you could flip this and ask whether people would be equally concerned if you'd been wandering around at night in drab? My guess is yes. Any person wandering at night (without a dog!) is open to suspicion in this paranoid world and a lone man even more so. The CDing likely just doubles their concern as everyone here knows most people don't understand it.

I also find people in RV parks are super paranoid as they don't who their neighbors are.

Maybe just keep to daylight hours?

[Marcelle]

Hi Kim,

I am so sorry to hear what happened to you. I can only applaud your courage for going out in the first place (I have not presented publically). The others are right, it is just the narrow minded opinions of a few who don't understand or are more likely too afraid to understand.

You did a brave thing by walking around, hold your head up high. You are an inspiration.

Hugs

Isha

[Amy R Lynn]

That would make you want to take a step back for sure.

Reine always has such great advice! You can almost be certain that it was probably one person. No one else would call security or the police if they saw someone walking around. Why would they? You were just taking a walk. I'm very certain that most people would not think a thing of it.

I agree I would not let that stop you. Good luck, and do be safe out there!

[kimdl93]

Honestly, if I "flip this around" I would think nothing of anyone taking a walk on the lighted driveways of an RV park, at 8:15 pm, particurly, when the daylight temp topped 100, regardless of how they were dressed...dog or no dog. Walking laps is hardly what I'd construe as "wandering in the night" either.

But perhaps taking a walk is inconceivable and highly suspect to the average resident of this RV park- I've encountered three (3) people total in perhaps a half dozen walks at 8-8:30 pm.

[Jenniferathome]

Kim, you can't stop small mindedness, but now you know the cops won't respond so keep on walking. You may actually change some minds.

[Chickhe]

I would not stop. Doing so confirms to the person who reported you that you did something wrong. I wouldn't push it, but go for another walk and look for the person who watches you then quickly pulls the shades closed... then visit them the next day to introduce yourself.

[Lynn Marie]

Sorry Kim. A dose of reality for sure. You're such a sweetheart, it's really a shame that it had to happen to you. Time for a new dress and a pair of matching pumps. You're a lovely lady, old folks tend to be afraid of everything.

[Beverley Sims]

People in parks seem to always want to check out the new neighbor.
Why can't they just mind their own business.
Sorry it happened to you, it does set things back a bit.

[noeleena]

Hi,

Iv been around a few camp sites worked in one plus Jos & I for a year, and our daughter & Dejarn, so i know what its like i would do the rounds every day / night though the difference we were in charge & the word ill use is ... we knew ... every one,

Now wether youd do this is over to you knock on every door if you like & say hi & you walk around the camp each night so they will know you, , it seems to me those or some are older so think as they do , who's this out late or when ever / time what's this person up to. so preempt thier concerns about you, or something along those lines.

...noeleena...

[monalisa]

I think my heart would have stopped when the policeman called me over. Seems like there is always someone to complain about something and certainly you weren't bothering anyone. Maybe it was a jealous wife and thought you looked too good.

[Angela Campbell]

After checking my vehicle registration he went on to say that if people called in the future the police dept wouldn't bother me.

I might have asked why he was bothering me now. There is no law stating how you should look or dress.

[linda allen]

Kim, I'm sorry this happened to you, but the bad part is over now so there's no need to stop walking. The police won't be back. If any of the residents still have a problem with you walking, they will have to just suck it up and close their curtains. It's probably just one person anyway.

As for the police, they got a call, it's their duty to respond to the call. He could have been a little nicer about it perhaps, but he didn't know what to expect.

And of course, this is a "dose of reality". Any one of us could be in the same situation - asked by the police to identify ourselves and explain why we are males dressed as females. It's not against the law (that I now of), but it's unusual. I think Kim's explanation was appropriate and it left the officer satisfied that she wasn't some pervert out to pick up children or someone who had disguised himself to commit a crime.

[Amanda22]

Kim, I imagine it was a really bad feeling to have a spotlight shown on you and called over to the squad car. I'd have had a lump in my throat the size of a baseball. My take on this horrible experience is that some (how many is debatable) people think crossdressers are very apt to be criminals. A year or two ago I attended a film presentation shown at a local church. The short film showed the daily activities of a crossdresser and did a great job presenting the "why" of CDing. The film was shown by the church to serve as a topic of discussion. I and my wife were amazed how many of the viewers thought that if the person in the film crossdressed, it was likely they justified molesting children. It was shocking. Yes, they were ignorant and uninformed, but I think there are people who think someone who crossdresses is also a criminal. Has anyone ever seen this type of response? I live in Chattanooga TN, by the way.

[Karren H]

Personally I think its time to ramp it up and put on a show every night!... Over the top..... Assuming you can make it around the park in stilettos..... gravel drives usually cause me issues....

[Amanda M]

Nasty event Kim! As far as those who were offended - sod them, to put it as politely as I can. Please, please don't give into them. If they try to complain again, and if the Officer speaks to you about it, tell him to charge them for wasting police time!