Ok, Hope you got the bug of one of my favorite songs, the age of Aquarius....
So what is it with the people my age? why do we lose our ability to conceal our feminine sides? Ok, maybe I didn't hide it ALL that well, I would hear occasional comments, you smoke like a girl, that was kinda girly yadda yadda yadda. But not often. Sometimes it would slip through the cracks. Boy did I try everything in my power to keep it buried though and did successfully for the most part.
So often I read about people who are or were my age and that is when the reveal happened. I was married for 20x years.... it wasn't until I was 40x that I came to accept this about myself.
I am no different than many. I sought out a gender therapist, had 1x1 sessions and a 2 with my wife. Interesting suggestions as to the why now ?? was that either it was time for my brain to begin healing itself from all of the years of scaring itself over this. Another was that by finding my current wife who has made me more confident in the male part of me, it was ok to let out the female part of me... hmmm. Very possible. I can buy that.
Or perhaps one theory I have floating through the gray matter is that there is simply so much energy one has to fight against part of oneself. It would appear on average that one has about 30 to 40 years worth of energy before it is spent, and then somehow we have nothing left in the tank to fight this part of ourselves.
One last theory... T levels. I haven't had mine checked. But, of the symptoms of a low T-level, I don't have any. As a dude/dudette my age, I have plenty of energy, my physical abilities and sex drive have not diminished as like in the commercials. So, it is unlikely that I have a lower T-level. But, perhaps at this age, and which is not uncommon, there is a hormonal change. Perhaps just more E not a lack of T??
Any thoughts on this from those who are or have been my age when this happened-