2nd court audience, my voice passes on the phone ...

[bas1985]

Hi,

Just some updates. Today I have had my second court audience for divorce. I seem to have obtained shared custody even if for these initial months I will continue to see the kids only sparingly. Things should improve somewhat during spring 2014, that is the milestone that should start me into HRT... funny coincidence.

I have come out to my lawyer. She says that she sees it as a "no issue", but has warned me to keep things hidden until the divorce has been settled because she fears not of the kids but of the other part which may manipulate my being trans to alter the shared custody.

That is only part of the journey... in any case the judge has obliged me and my ex-wife to go to a family mediator which should help us in dealing with the separation. I hope he may help us also in the future when I come out, but I am not sure; in any case I am developing a net of trusted people (my lawyer, my psychologist, and maybe also the social worker) which have at least a "partial" come out. This for me is important, really important.

You say that do not transition unless you have to. Well, I HAVE to, but if I have to choose to transition or losing the kids well, I probably would delay the transition... but I don't really know how, because I am starting to change... literally.

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This introduces my latest days experiences.

My voice is changing. During the last days especially on the phone I get many "Mrs...", not from people who know me, of course, but by strangers, usually market research, or interviews.

I go to the phone, say: "Hello?".

"Hello, am I speaking with Mrs. ****?" (my name).

At first I corrected them. "No, I am Mr. ***". "Oh, sorry", but in these last
days I tried to "stay in the part" and said: "Yes, I am Mrs. ***".

Today I spoke for about five minutes with my feminine voice and I passed completely, the poor girl on the other side continued to tell me: "SignorA..." (Mrs in Italian, Mr is "SignorE" a very different sound, it cannot be mistaken.

My problem seems contrary to most MtF who pass completely visual but fail to pass orally. I seem to pass almost 100% orally on the phone but people continue to "sir" me on daily life. Well, I am not even on hormones and I have short hair...

In any case I continue to experiment with different looks and hope that sometime I will get a "signora" also in the street and not only on the phone.

Thank you for listening!

[Leanne2]

Your English is quite good for someone raised speaking Italian. Yes, you are progressing well if your voice can pass as female on the telephone. Most of us can't do that. Good luck with your court dates. Keep us posted with your progress. Leanne