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  1. #1
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    Halloween is not your salvation

    It's that time of year again and the Halloween threads are starting. For the lurkers and newbies, I offer this advice.

    I know there are some, perhaps many, who think Halloween is a perfect chance to dress publicly as a female of some sort and yet stay closeted. Wrong. You are kidding yourself if you think that anyone will consider it just a costume.

    100% of your friends and strangers (even kids on the candy hunt) will think you are a closet cross dresser or more likely gay. Unless you dress Monty Python-esque and in a group, an obvious joke (and even then it is a close call), you will not get the benefit of the doubt. Men just do not dress as women.

    So, dress as you like and have fun but suck it up and realize what it means. If you honestly think it will be perceived as a costume, don't do it. It's not a costume, it's a statement.

  2. #2
    Transgender Member Dianne S's Avatar
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    Funny, but I've never really been much into Halloween. Where I grew up as a kid, Halloween wasn't celebrated. Only when we moved to Canada was I exposed to it, and by then I was a bit old to have good kid memories of it. As an adult, I actively dislike Halloween... I hate the constant interruptions from kids trying to extort candy. I usually go out or turn off most lights and pretend I'm not home.

    I agree with Jenniferathome: If you crossdress on Halloween, people will be suspicious. You're basically outing yourself.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by dawn03 View Post
    As an adult, I actively dislike Halloween... I hate the constant interruptions from kids trying to extort candy. I usually go out or turn off most lights and pretend I'm not home.
    Wow, what a fuddy duddy. Party Pooper.

  4. #4
    Transgender Member Dianne S's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MysticLady View Post
    Wow, what a fuddy duddy. Party Pooper.
    Hey, it's what I grew up with! There are plenty of other ways to have fun.

  5. #5
    Junior Member Dannigurlfriend's Avatar
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    You it's odd but I have never even considered dressing on Halloween. But I would agree that getting dressed and using the holiday as a way of going out most likely isn't the best idea.
    “All men are liars, said Roberta Muldoon, who knew this was true because she had once been a man.”
    ― John Irving, The World According to Garp

  6. #6
    Member tiffanyjo89's Avatar
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    I actually think you bring a valid point up, but I think it depends on how seriously you've done costumes in the past, if you've done guy's costumes.

    If you are a person who goes to conventions and participates in the cosplay community, then being a girl (in a girl costume, not just a "everyday girl") on Halloween with shaved legs, serious makeup, and other things is normal. If you are an otherwise "average Jo/e" who is the type to buy a costume off the shelf and put it on the first time the night of a party, then you probably would draw attention to yourself if you show up in a skirt and have your legs shaved.
    I'm a guy who likes girls, I just like a little more about them than the average guy.

  7. #7
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    I disagree 100%. 'Normal' guys do not dress up as women. Ever. Not even as jokes. And unless they're professional swimmers, NO GUYS shave their legs. As kids, when we played football and taped our ankles for extra support, a lot of us shaved up to the knee, but that was it. NO FURTHER. And we let it grow back right after football season. There will be some professional actors who try it to see if they can 'get away with it', or maybe to see just how good their acting talents are, but there's no way 99% of them will ever pass. And we don't, either.
    If you want to be out, be out. But don't kid yourself that you're fooling anyone.....other than yourself, of course.
    Last edited by Tamara Croft; 09-19-2013 at 03:30 PM. Reason: you do not need to quote the previous post, read the rules
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  8. #8
    Member tiffanyjo89's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sometimes_miss View Post
    'Normal' guys do not dress up as women.
    Yes, 'normal' guys don't.
    But the people I was referring to are the ones who go to things like Comic Con and spend hours and days designing costumes. Many people do genderswapped versions of the costumes, and there are people who do full on cross-gendered costumes.

    Like I said, it's up to the person in this case. Most people don't put that much effort into costumes, so they would definitely attract attention putting together even a slightly passable presentation. For those who are known to put effort into buying just the right things for a costume (I'm not doing Spock unless I can find the right color for my shirt and make the ears look just right) then going full on as a girl, wearing a girl's costume (not normal girls clothes) could work. For those (and this is probably about 75-85% of people) who would just buy those cheap vampire teeth and just have a black cape to be Dracula, but nothing else, except for maybe a layer of white makeup to take the color out of their face), then yes, you would definitely attract attention.
    I'm a guy who likes girls, I just like a little more about them than the average guy.

  9. #9
    Swans have more fun! sandra-leigh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sometimes_miss View Post
    I disagree 100%. 'Normal' guys do not dress up as women. Ever. Not even as jokes.
    Unless they are participating in cancer support activities. Or are participating in Take Back The Night. Or are participating in ****Walk. Or came through the British boys school system, where the women were always played by men (which there is hundreds of years of tradition for, because in a number of European countries, acting on stage was prohibited for women.) Or they are part of an all-male sketch comedy or improv act.

    Quote Originally Posted by sometimes_miss View Post
    And unless they're professional swimmers, NO GUYS shave their legs.
    Unless they are bicycle racers. Or are speed skaters. Or are wrestlers. Or have medical problems with their legs. Or are models.

    I shaved my legs a couple of times, for cross-dressing reasons, several years ago. My wife noticed quickly. No-one else said a thing, never a question.

    These days I do not shave my legs because I simply have so little hair on them that it would almost be pointless. It just happened that way. There might be a relationship to HRT, but I do recall that it was getting fairly sparse even before that. No-one asks, no one stares, no one cares.

  10. #10
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    I partially agree. It's easier to get away with it if you dress as a female character than as "a woman". Then, it's just a costume, not an excuse for CDer to dress up. Fine line, most likely. Shaving the legs "for authenticity" is a hard sell.

  11. #11
    Member Christie Camelle's Avatar
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    Oh! Don't dress as a zombie! People might aim for your head! Have mercy! Do not dress as Frankenstein (or his bride)! They will grab their pitchforks! They might burn you at the stake of you dress as a witch! And whatever you do, do NOT put a star on your Christmas tree this year! That is a dead giveaway that you are from space! *rolls her eyes* Hell, just tell people you're dressed as a crossdresser for Halloween!! LMAO!
    ” I'm hell on heels, say what you will ”

  12. #12
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Maybe dressing on halloween is more about sticking one foot out of the closet - a way to show that you do have an interest in CDing without making an actual statement. Someone told me long ago that's it's better to joke about being kinky than to keep it all pent up inside. So why not let a few people see you dressed one day of the year when others are wearing costumes? Will people talk? Wonder? Assume? Yes, they will. But for some of us it may be a way of testing the waters. I don't see myself dressing on halloween, but I'm pretty sure those that do know what they're getting into.

    Oh, once I wore a blonde wig with a monster mask. I wonder if I outed myself? haha

  13. #13
    Member Christie Camelle's Avatar
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    From my experience, this is not always the case. Like Tiffany said, it also depends on your past costumes. I have been Freddie Krueger in the past (complete with clothes that smelled burned), the Joker (perfect Heath Ledger scars), and the 7-Up Spot. Everyone I know knows that I plan Halloween costumes a year in advance. I dressed en femme last year. No costume. It was a hit and no issues or questions from anyone except "wow" and "how did you do that?" I had zero problems from strangers. It was amazing. It's Halloween, not confession. Relax and have fun with it!
    ” I'm hell on heels, say what you will ”

  14. #14
    Aspiring Member vallerie lacy's Avatar
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    Even an attorney will tell you, if you can get an answer without a retainer, that dressing up "a la drag" for Halloween is only circumstantial evidence in the case of John Doe vs crossdresser Lori Ann. If you have the wish to go out dressed, than screw those who label you. You're dressing for Halloween not xmas dinner at Aunt Sylvia's. Have a good time and remember to let any smart ass remarks roll off you as water rolls off a ducks freshly waxed bill or beak or ass.

  15. #15
    Wayfarer EmilyPith's Avatar
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    Good points all around, I think.
    Proceed with caution.

    As an aside, Is this just costume to you, or are your drab clothes the costume?



    I for one want to be the bunny girl from the first episode of the Walking Dead.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Emily

    We're the ones who start little fires, yet they burn out
    But when they're on the rise, we can't help but shine

    And when the wave approaches, take our ashes to the ocean
    Who cares if hell awaits? We're having drinks at heaven's gate

    "Modern Jesus" Portugal (The Man)

  16. #16
    Silver Member Sherlyn's Avatar
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    Did you have a bad experience on Halloween Jennifer.? ..your kinda knocking down something many here look forward to ...someone here for the first time reading this may react and be afraid to do something they have been looking forward to... cuz they are in the closet.... and to them its a chance for some fun ..it's Halloween ..everyone can be who they want ..who cares ...ya.. you might get a laff ...and on the other hand if you pull it off well with pride of who you are... you may just get a compliment..its not the bad..roll the dice ...

  17. #17
    Girl about Town Jodie_Lynn's Avatar
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    Wonderful. Next you're all going to tell me that the Great Pumpkin doesn't exist either!
    Before you can love another, you must first like yourself

    I Aim To Misbehave

    Labels belong on BOXES, not PEOPLE!

  18. #18
    Silver Member Majella St Gerard's Avatar
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    I have dressed up as Dracula many times for Halloween and nobody has ever accused me of being a vampire. I have dressed as a woman twice in 50 years, the first time when I was in my 30's, I just dressed up as a woman no real costume, I got lots of "looks". The second time was when I was 49, I wore a French maid uniform. I don't care what people think, if I did I wouldn't have worn the outfit.

  19. #19
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    No Sherlyn, never had a bad experience. Never dressed as a woman for halloween. But those few rare guys who did, were always talked about in exactly the way I described. The point is, you don't need Halloween to go out. You're proof of that as am I. In fact, a "woman" is not a costume! I think expectations can run so high because this odd event seemingly provides some cover. It doesn't cover cross dressers. And as I wrote in the original post: dress and have fun. But be prepared or as you stated, "..roll the dice ..."
    Last edited by Tamara Croft; 09-19-2013 at 05:58 PM. Reason: you don't need to quote the post, next time it gets deleted

  20. #20
    Silver Member Sherlyn's Avatar
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    But I'm wondering Jennifer... you say a few rare guys who did ...that's rare ???..lol ...I think not ....sounds like the few can control the many ..in this case I think not .....and of course roll the dice

  21. #21
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenniferathome View Post
    Never dressed as a woman for halloween.
    That's interesting. Never did it but knows all the bad stuff that will happen if you do.
    Many of us did it, had a great time, and lived to tell about it.
    Stated with authority, having done it.

  22. #22
    Gold Member ~Joanne~'s Avatar
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    I disagree all the way around. I refuse to believe this at all. Halloween is the perfect time for a closeted girl to test the waters. If nothing else, just to get out of the house for a bit. Personally I go out a few days before halloween and not much has ever been said but if it ever did, it's my crutch. On halloween I prefer a female costume as this year I hope to do batgirl. If we do anything at all this halloween , we should at least have some fun.
    Flip Flops were made for Beaches & Bath Houses, We have neither in 2017. Lose the flip flops!

  23. #23
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    your really ruining it for a lot of people.

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    Quote Originally Posted by arbon View Post
    your really ruining it for a lot of people.
    Yep, reality bites. But if you are prepared, the bite is not as bad.

  25. #25
    Administrator Tamara Croft's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by arbon View Post
    your really ruining it for a lot of people.
    Cus he has nothing better to do...

    We have tones of men who dress as women here for halloween, no one cares, no one is talking about it, people are having parties and having a good laugh... you need to stop ruining it for people and those agreeing with you, stop being sheep... baaaaaaa........
    Administrator

    Missing my Libra babe Sherlyn, I hope she's rocking up there with the angels
    Missing our Rianna, doesn't seem right, gone to early, hope she's partying with Sherlyn

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