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Thread: Halloween is not your salvation

  1. #76
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    @Stevie - Its halloween! Free pass day. Some people might suspect, but unlikely they would assume the worst, and even if they did don't let it stop you if you want to do it. And what is the worst anyway?

    Last year the mayor of the town I live in did drag, I ran into him at the grocery store and everyone was getting a good giggle our of it. But he is still mayor, no one cared the next day.

  2. #77
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    Quote Originally Posted by dawn03 View Post
    As an adult, I actively dislike Halloween... I hate the constant interruptions from kids trying to extort candy. I usually go out or turn off most lights and pretend I'm not home.
    Wow, what a fuddy duddy. Party Pooper.

  3. #78
    Silver Member Tina_gm's Avatar
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    Arbon that wouldn't be Mayor West would it? who looked at himself in the mirror and said "my God, I am a woman" (referencing to family guy btw)
    Chickens should be allowed to cross the road without having their motives questioned

  4. #79
    Transgender Member Dianne S's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MysticLady View Post
    Wow, what a fuddy duddy. Party Pooper.
    Hey, it's what I grew up with! There are plenty of other ways to have fun.

  5. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tamara Croft View Post
    Cus he has nothing better to do...

    We have tones of men who dress as women here (England) for halloween, no one cares, no one is talking about it, people are having parties and having a good laugh...
    Indeed, in my earlier post about it depending where in the world it is done, I had in mind England, and even more specifically, the once famous professor and novelist Kingsley Amis, crashing an Oxbridge faculty party with a friend, both cross-dressed. He annoyed the up-tight, had a lot to drink, and enjoyed it as an outrageous prank. Maybe he was trying to get even for his disappointment that his fellow professors were not serious enough about English literature to engage in enough well-thought out conversation on academic subjects. Or maybe the man who called Jane Austen's genre as amounting to the "pornography of money" was just a rebel.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bifrost View Post
    I've always found that dressing for Halloween so effectively that you pass as a female to all but those who know you well is a hoot. That said, I've been out for years, so when people comment on my look, that it's a little "too good", I nod and smile and explain that I had to try to tone it down from what I was wearing Tuesday.

    Of course it can arouse suspicions if you do it too well, or"just happen" to have a full outfit of women's clothes when you are a man, so you can cross-dress really well as a woman. I got asked at a costume party before I transitioned, where I got the clothes. I sort of fibbed a little and said, "from here and there." But i could point to the fact that some items were men's clothing, that just could look like women's. The theme was a beach holiday in the south, and the few other guys who dressed contented themselves with a men's Hawaian shirt and sunglasses, or something like that, though the women who dressed, got into more elaborate costumes, (but not cross-dressing).
    . . It was the first time I had dressed really in public I think, at least in front of people I knew, and my nerves ran riot the whole week before, and I was going to call it off, but eventually went anyway. I huddled in the car outside for a few minutes before going in, watching others arrive first, and when I did go in, I was wearing plain beige women's slacks, which, when I saw nobody seemed hostile, I took off in the bathroom and revealed a shortish white skort. During the party I was really amazed at how I sat with some male acquaintances, dressed like that and straightening out my skirt once in a while, and talking completely normally with them about such things as cable tv, etc., and nobody in that church choir seemed to think anything was amiss! The minister who had poor eyesight, seeing me across the room, did not recognize me, asking who the woman was. It was a hoot!
    Last edited by Beth-Lock; 09-20-2013 at 04:34 PM.

  6. #81
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tamara Croft View Post
    We have tones of men who dress as women here for halloween, no one cares, no one is talking about it, people are having parties and having a good laugh...
    I think the UK is more progressive than your more puritanical cousins, the US. You certainly have much better insurance support for transition than we do (and I'm guessing your anti gender discrimination laws are better too), and I'm wondering if this makes a difference in how people in the UK generally see TSs, which then extends to CDs.

    Also, the guys you speak of who get a good laugh at the Halloween parties ... are they dressing for real like the CDers here would be, or are they doing it on a lark with big inflated boobs, platinum wigs with beard showing, etc? Men in the US do this too and they also get laughs if it is obvious to others that they are making a parody of CDers.
    Reine

  7. #82
    Platinum Member Eryn's Avatar
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    I think that we all go through similar experiences. At first we are scared to death that some random person might twig to our secret passion of CDing. We're so focused on it that we think that everyone is similarly focused. Later on we figure out that not everyone is playing "spot the CDer." and relax a bit.

    I don't dress on Halloween simply because I don't want to do a "drag" portrayal. I prefer to dress normally and that doesn't make a good costume.

    Wear a dress for Halloween and somebody is likely to say "Getting a little girly there, sport! Sure you aren't liking it too much?" If you respond with vehement denials you come off as insecure and suspect. Brush such questions off with humor and confidence "You're just jealous of me looking fabulous!" and you'll be fine.
    Eryn
    "These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
    "She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
    "Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]

  8. #83
    Nondressing CDer ReluctantDebutant's Avatar
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    At first I was going to wholeheartedly disagree with the OP based on my own experience going out fully in DRAG for Halloween. I went with a large group of friends to a public place. These friends have seen me go all out on my various wacky costumes in previous Halloweens. I guess I would have caught some suspicious eyes had I done this by myself out of the blue. I guess if one wants to go out but keep their closet secure establish a pattern of off the wall costumes for 2 or 3 Halloweens prior to going as a girl.

  9. #84
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    I dressed as a girl 3 years in a row. I have since told a number of people who saw me dressed up. Some of the people were surprised. They never would have guessed I was a crossdresser, even after seeing me in a skirt on more than one occasion. The one person who said they had already suspected, saw me dressed on a non halloween day outing. They saw me dressed in January, and they only suspected. You never know what goes through somebody else's minds. Just relax and get out if you want to and don't worry about it.

  10. #85
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    I am not going to agree or disagree, I am going to say that when I went out as a girl everything went just fine. I dressed as a bar wench (in a long dress not the short ones). My sister-in-law did my make-up. We went out to a party that was mostly people that my wife worked with, but I still knew alot of them. I have had a couple of comments over the years but nothing bad. This outing gave me the confidence to go out a few years later when it wasn't Halloween. I had a guy I didn't know come up to me and look really close, he didn't make up his mind I was a guy until I spoke to him. And prior to the party we stopped at a store to get drinks and I passed there too. It took me a while to put it together but now I can go out and pass pretty well, my confidence came from that Halloween.

  11. #86
    The Girl Next Door Sally24's Avatar
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    I have to disagree with the assumption that "normal" guys do not dress up at all. We have gone to a number of parties with males in female costumes. No one questioned if they were a CD. Boys in my school dressed up for plays. Many of us dressed for Greek week skits. And entertainers have done it forever! It's pretty common for boys and men to be interested in women's clothing and the whole "I wonder" thing. If you want to go out on Halloween, don't go as a female........go as a female character. Wonder Woman, Fairy Princess, Scarlett O'hara.........

    And have fun!!
    Sally

  12. #87
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    I think the first time you go out dressed on Halloween, no one will think you'e a crossdresser.

    But, they will always remember the time you wore a girl costume, and if you dress as a girl a second time Anytime in Your lifetime, you'll be made.

    You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  13. #88
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    Okay first of all. Whether it was meant to or not the original post came off rather strong. Secondly. I agree and disagree. If you dress fem once, or even occasionally then you may be alright. If you do it year after year like I do then you have 99% likely been made. Also, if you wear a feminine costume you have a good chance of someone catching on. My friends are not dumb, and this will be year 7 of nothing but female costumes for me. You know what, they are still my friends. No one has ever come out and asked if I was a CD, and I do not offer the info. As I see it I (publicly) do what I like to do once or twice per year at Halloween. It is no one else's business but that of my wife and mine. And as an example of how my friends think, both face to face and on FaceBook, I get messages through much of the year stating that they are anxiously waiting to see what I come up with next.

  14. #89
    I am Ana, hear me roar! 27th Jennifer's Avatar
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    Well, you have to start somewhere....

  15. #90
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eryn View Post
    I don't dress on Halloween simply because I don't want to do a "drag" portrayal. I prefer to dress normally and that doesn't make a good costume.
    My SO also lost the taste for dressing on Halloween. She felt that she was dishonoring herself in the sense that her feminine self is not a costume nor does she want to turn herself into a costume ... her feminine self is part of who she is internally.
    Reine

  16. #91
    Silver Member Sherlyn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ReineD View Post
    My SO also lost the taste for dressing on Halloween. She felt that she was dishonoring herself in the sense that her feminine self is not a costume nor does she want to turn herself into a costume ... her feminine self is part of who she is internally.
    I do not understand this thinking at all...Di and I look forward to having a fun night out ...We are going as a Gatsby girl and a Flapper..I do not feel like I'm dishonouring myself by turning into a Flapper for a one night yearly celebration ..nor does Di .....its just fun ...sometimes I swear some of you just get to deep down in the serious side of life over nothing ..wearing a costume on Halloween should just be fun ..Sher is Sher.... even on Halloween..... in a costume...no dishonour to myself .. !!!
    Last edited by Sherlyn; 09-21-2013 at 08:15 AM.

  17. #92
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    I have to agree with Sherlyn and other on this one. If I am guy and I dress up like Superman/Batman/Zombie or whatever I am not dishonouring my "male side" I am still me costume or not. If I am Isha and I am dressing up as Supergirl / Catwoman / Female Zombie or whatever, I am not dishonoring my femme side any more than I am dishonouring my male side. I am still me costume or not.

    If a GG dresses up in a female costume . . . is she dishonouring her female side/spirit . . . not likely . . . she is having fun and enjoying herself.

    In the end, it is Halloween and it is supposed to be fun. What's next? I can't wear my sexy Female Elf outfit on Christmas because I am dishonouring the "female elf" side of me?

    My two cents.

    Hugs

    Isha
    Last edited by Marcelle; 09-21-2013 at 10:18 AM.

  18. #93
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ReineD View Post
    My SO also lost the taste for dressing on Halloween. She felt that she was dishonoring herself in the sense that her feminine self is not a costume nor does she want to turn herself into a costume ... her feminine self is part of who she is internally.
    I don't get this thinking. I am a male internally. I don't see how dressing as a male character on Halloween (say, a pirate) dishonors my masculine self.
    I could understand not wanting to go out on Halloween "as a woman", but why not as a character, male or female?
    It's Halloween - it's about costumes and characters this one day of the year.

  19. #94
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    I don't see the harm. Many, many years ago i got an invite to a Halloween party. I decided i wanted to go as a woman. I hadn't dressed prior to that time since i was a young teenager. My wife didn't think anything of it except that I was really, really into it.

    We went to the party (yes there were people from work there). No one said i was gay, no one gave me a hard time, it was just fun.

    Afterwards i announced to my wife that i wanted to dress again. At the point i got the inevitable GG questions that we all get : are you gay, do you want to become a woman, etc? and that was sort of my start with dressing somewhat regularly.

    But my point is if you want to give it try Halloween is perfect! It may not be a salvation, not sure what she means by that. But i say if you want just go for it!

  20. #95
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    Men dressing as women on Halloween is not really a problem, regardless of if it's a campy outfit (ballerina) or "trying to pass and blend". Yeah sure some might think "Bill sure seems to pull it off well and know what he is doing" and MAYBE suspicious but ain't no one gonna make a big deal of it except maybe the NOSIEST pricks in the family or office who should be avoided anyways. Even then no one is gonna dwell on it.

    Though it doesn't happen much on the CD forums, it is pretty sad that some CD have their own version of discrediting.
    What next? Saying the GG's will out themselves as GG's if they dress like women and pass too well?
    Or what about men who dress like men? Will they get accused of getting turned on by dressing in men's clothes?
    It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.

  21. #96
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sherlyn View Post
    I do not understand this thinking at all...Di and I look forward to having a fun night out ...We are going as a Gatsby girl and a Flapper..I do not feel like I'm dishonouring myself by turning into a Flapper for a one night yearly celebration ..nor does Di .....its just fun ...sometimes I swear some of you just get to deep down in the serious side of life over nothing ..wearing a costume on Halloween should just be fun ..Sher is Sher.... even on Halloween..... in a costume...no dishonour to myself .. !!!


    This statement by Sheryln needs to be repeated again, WAY TO GO GIRL!!!
    [SIZE="3"][/SIZE][SIZE="3"]Stacy Lynn Coral[/SIZE]

  22. #97
    Aspiring Member Brenda Freeman's Avatar
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    I love dressing up year around when I get the opportunity . When I was young about 11 I could not think of a costume to wear on halloween and really did not plan to go out and my mom wanted to dress me up as a girl. I wanted to so bad but was afraid what everyone else would think (there were a lot of bullies in my neighborhood). I have always regretted that, I would have loved to see how I would have looked fully dressed with make up at that age, I probably would have not gone out but missed the opportunuity, My mom always wanted a daughter It would have been fun. So today much older and wiser? I dress up in costumes near Halloween, french maid,witch, saloon girl for me. I usually go to a tgirl friendly party and have a ball! No bullies. Have been to a bar LGBT friendly) on Halloween as a frenchmaid had so much fun. I get what others have to say pros and cons to each her own, but for me Halloween is fun. I have not dressed up when I am home greeting tricker treaters, I love watching the smiles on their faces having FUN!

  23. #98
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    "What next? Saying the GG's will out themselves as GG's if they dress like women and pass too well?
    Or what about men who dress like men? Will they get accused of getting turned on by dressing in men's clothes?"
    A quote from Nicole that puts a different spread on things.
    Food for thought there.

    This thread makes interesting reading when you read what Reine has to say and Erin and Sherlyn's replies.
    More food for thought.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  24. #99
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sherlyn View Post
    I do not understand this thinking at all...Di and I look forward to having a fun night out ...
    Quote Originally Posted by NicoleScott View Post
    I don't get this thinking. I am a male internally.
    My SO just feels differently than you both do. Maybe being gender non-conforming (outside the gender binary) has something to do with it. My SO identifies as dualgender. So to her, her feminine presentation is not a costume, is all. This realization only came about 3 years after she began to go out in the mainstream and interacted with people while dressed. So she sort of feels as if she is betraying her feminine self when she treats the whole thing like a costume.

    It's natural that not everyone is at the same place along the spectrum.
    Reine

  25. #100
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Sometimes I worry about u, Reine. Do u 2 ever really let go? Just blow it all out and really have fun?

    Quote Originally Posted by ReineD View Post
    --------------------------------------------
    Also, the guys you speak of who get a good laugh at the Halloween parties ... are they dressing for real like the CDers here would be, or are they doing it on a lark with big inflated boobs, platinum wigs with beard showing, etc? Men in the US do this too and they also get laughs if it is obvious to others that they are making a parody of CDers.
    I must disagree with u on this point. When vanilla men dress up as women it's to parody WOMEN. They aren't even thinking about CD's!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

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