" a rose by any other name ..."
" a rose by any other name ..."
[SIZE="4"]Jilly[/SIZE]for today and tomorrow
I have always been very happy as a fem in a male body it gave me the best of both worlds, I have my children a wife and sex as a male or female ,I became a cross dresser at five years old and have never regretted it for one second, I could become boy or girl at my choice as I got older my dream was to be a she male but due to meeting and falling deeply in love with my wife it dropped to the wayside until years later she confessed to being extremely bi this allowed me to explain my needs at witch I found pleased her as she could have both with me male or female and it has been great until now, but now my life in the middle lane is coming to a end due to prostate cancer and lumps on the testicle and surgery seems the only option, this will leave me with no choice but to become female, so I feel cheated as I was happy being both, my wife is content at the thought and has been of great support and all she wants is me by her side in the years to come ,I feel lucky to have such a fantastic partner and im making the most of what time I have left as a male if it has to go then it will be well used before it gets the chop, and I adopt a female role permanently and still have a life ahead of me and no doubt will come to enjoy my new life with my partner as much as my old one
Dear god, I blame the internet. At first, (as in, before I was exposed to the internet) I just considered myself to be your basic freak-of-nature kid who liked womens' clothing. However, with the internet, and my chance to be a woman in various online games...well let's just say from then, things started falling into place.
Hi Helen,Originally Posted by helenscotlanduk
Thank you for your post. I found it very interesting and the thought has crossed my mind re: prostate cancer that it would be ultimate irony to contract a male disease the treatment of which is feminisation.
I assume when you you say you were left with no choice - you mean it is the most palatable option.
Anyway best wishes for your treatment and you future life as a female.
Fiona xx
Originally Posted by Sophie62
Hi Sophie,
You raise a number of issues in your post. I'm not an expert but there is nothing in what you say that would suggest you are TS. However, you allude to the theory that for many CD/TVs it was very much a dynamic and developmental process. It seems to be that the more we self immerse in cd-ing and female activities - then the more the female personna grows.
So far as sexual arrousal is concerned, a large percentage of the respondents to my 'rip off' of the 'Is It Sexual?' poll on Roses Forum said that the sexual arrousal component of dressing diminished as their female personna developed.
Happiness? There is no doubt that at the TS end of the spectrum there are those who are grossly disoriented and unhappy in their birth gender and simply can't function in that state. However most of us can function in our birth gender to one degree or another. We are also on a rollercoaster and if the only 'highs' [in every sense of the word] are clearly indentified with time spent in female mode then I think you are on the road to TS. But then for those of us, who are part timers, there is an element of 'vacation euphoria' - where we go to wonderful place and love it so much we want to live there permanently.
Gender specialists? - I think any psychs who are members of HBGIDA [Harry Benjamin Gender Indentity Dysphoria Association or something like that?] will have experience in treating GID.
Thanks for your post Sophie.
Fiona xx
Last edited by FionaAlexis; 04-12-2006 at 12:56 AM.
Hi Miriannah,Originally Posted by Miriannah
There is no doubt the internet has brought us together as never before - and has given us the opportunity to have a female ID irrespective of how we are dressed during communication.
Fiona xx
CD or TS I've been dodging that question for years. Anytime it surfaced I would bury it as deep as I could. I've always been extremely self consious in my male role and never fitted in. In the last two years I've been dressing more and more in Fem mode. About the only time I dress as male anymore is when I'm at work. No I don't always wear dresses I dress as most GGs do, at home everyday fem outfits (shorts, jeans, sweatpants blouse) . When I go out its either Fem jeans and blouse or skirt outfit. My daughter in law took me out the first time, and I was scared to death. After that i started going ut quite a bit. I get read fairly often because I dont really pass and I know it, but it doesnt bother me, At my 10 am counselling appointment this morning the counseler asked several pointed questions. among them when are you most comfortable, as male or female, easy answer there. Female how long have you been crossdressing? easy since around 6, which role is easier to interact with people, again easy FEM. and then she asked whether I was really a CD or TS. I dodged that one for then, but I haven't been able to get it off my mind its after 3 in the morning and I'm still struggling, with all the burried memories and feelings. I've dodged the question for so long that I'm truly afraid of admitting it, and what the consequences will be when I do. I know the answer but knowing and acknowledging it are two different and seperate things.
"In case you never noticed the path you never chose has Chosen you." (Jason Mraz)
I 'm a closeted transvestite. I say that because I know this is about more than just cding for me since I experienced the desire to become a girl long befor I ever crossdressed. Tucking has always been the most important part to me because it gives me a feeling of peace to know they are gone. Up until now I have been able to put this away and live like for normal male for periods of time, but it is always there waiting for the opportunity. Now that I am older I know if I were left to be me all the time I would take this much further, definately to at least HRT.
Marina 12's comments also make sense to me. I am not attracted to men so maybe it is all about the "ultimate blast." Except the yearning started so long ago.
Last edited by Star; 04-12-2006 at 01:35 PM.
Hi Bonnie,Originally Posted by Bonnie Jean
You touch on a couple of issues that I find interesting.
First I can understand the struggle to decide whether you are CD or TS. But the fear of deciding you are TS seems unfounded. Surely accepting that you are TS does not automatically mean you have take the transitioning route - if that is what you mean by the 'consequences'. You still have the freedom of choice - its not an 'OMG I'm TS - book me in for my SRS' kind of situation or do you feel it is?
The second is, and I think this applies to a lot of us, that, even if you don't really pass - you still feel more comfortable as a female. That would seem to suggest that the 'brain sex' is strong to the extent of ignoring or over coming physical shortcomings. Does that make sense?
Fiona xx
Hi Star,Originally Posted by Star
Well you would seem to be TG? And you probably always were?
Fiona xx
Hi Fiona,
I suppose I am looking for answers like so many others.
Star
Last edited by Star; 04-27-2006 at 10:22 AM.
No the consequences I meant are from my family, very conservative, and some very religeous, with narrow view points, they would fit in reel well about forty years ago. I've talked to them since I posted that and I got 2 supporting, 2 said dont talk to me again and 1 thats its up to you but. Yes your answer does make a lot of sense.
"In case you never noticed the path you never chose has Chosen you." (Jason Mraz)
Thank you to everyone who participated in this thread. I think its was one of the most informative and interesting discussions I've been involved with. I think every TG has a unique perspective of where they are, how they got there and maybe where they are heading.
Fiona xx