Why are we scared when buying female clothing?

[Valarie]

My Texas girls know about the deals that H-E-B have so you can appreciate this. I was at the store a few weeks ago and went through the cosmetic section, and saw there was a coupon for already reduced price wet n' wild lipstick (got it for .59) then found that my favorite brand of pantyhose, reg. price: $4.39 had a $2 off coupon so I got two pairs. I was fine the rest of the time doing the shopping while my wife was at work. When I got to the check out the butterflies hit. I was not with my wife, what if someone asked me who this was for and they escorted me out of the store for being a pervert! That didn't happen, instead the sales girl was blown away by the price I got for the lipstick, and said she would have to get some latter. Money speaks more, these stores could care less who buys what, as long as you spend, spend, spend.

[Wezzcott]

When I was younger, I used to very scared when buying women's clothing. I was scared that someone that I knew, or a friend would see me and tell everyone. It was so bad to the point where I would get shaky. I was always worried about what others would think, and now I just don't care. I think it was when I got married years ago and wore my wedding ring, it kind of gave me the confidence to buy the clothes. My logic was if anyone I knew seen me that knew me would just think I was buying the clothes for my wife and would just look "normal". These days, if I see something I like when I'm out and about, I just buy it with confidence. I also purchase a lot online as well.

[gillathome]

i usually find it a little bit scary, but i think a two-week old beard makes it easier. after all, it can't be for me, can it? and this time of year makes it easier

[Susan.]

When I was a young and married it was not a big deal to shop for clothes. But now that I am older and longer married it is much harder.

[Billiejosehine]

I remember the first time when ventured out to buy clothes and felt very uneasy and concerned what others were thinking. But as went on I continued to go out and buy clothes. Each time I went my confidence grew and told myself that it was not that bad. Now that I am married it seems a non issue for me to venture into the women's section especially the lingerie area. If I do have issues I use the excuse that it is for my wife. One time when I was at a store browsing the lingerie section, I saw a female worker at the end of the lingerie aisle who gave me a weird look. As I turned around and continued to browse I over heard them making comment on their headset how there was a guy in the lingerie area and for other co-workers to keep an eye on them. Why did matter to them that I was in that section. I find it quite rude for them say something like that on their headset.

[Jessica giovanna]

I feel bad for the girls whom can not feel like they can go out....going out en femme and shopping has never been an issue, neither in drab as well....just went out today and bought new undies and bras....heck...I even struck up a convo with a gg regarding my taste. I understand the fear, but try and work it out.
But remember....not all of us want to go out and we all have to understand this as well...
Kisses-ms g

[karens70]

it still freaks me out, the internet is my friend although the other day I did go into a shop and buy some heels. At this time of year its much easier, I made myself feel better by walking into the shop holding a roll of Christmas present wrapping paper I just bought, and then produced from my pocket a print out from the website of the shoes I wanted with the size scribbled on as if my other half had sent me on a mission. This was at Nine West, the woman behind the counter went and checked in the back and brought them out, she cracked a joke about me wearing them later, she was just being fun, but then she said "the number of men I have had in here in the same position over the past few weeks is unbelievable" (not buying size 11 I thought! :-) )

its ridiculous that I felt I had to create this whole scenario, to put on a show, but I sure felt better about it. I am sure it will change with time...

Just for info, the shoes are the gorgeous ones that are shown in my profile photo! Nine West Martina very classy

[Adriana Moretti]

thanks to the confidence gained by chatting with all you beautiful people here i have no more fears of buying anything in public.

[grace7777]

When i first started shopping for female clothes I would do it in drab. Eventually i started to shop en femme and now I almost always shop en femme.

When shopping in drab I liked stores with self checkout lanes. Once when shopping I had pantyhose which would not scan so the person overseeing the area asked me if I needed help, so i handed her the item telling her it would not scan and she ended prup having to enter it it in manually. She then smiled at me. I think she knew they were for me.

One time when shopping en femme I heard a male SA complaining to a female SA about there being a crossdresser in the store. The female SA said she did not care and had no problem with it and the male SA said nothing more about it. I continued shopping and had no problem and bought an item and was treated courteously by the cashier.

Two of my favorite places for shopping are Marshalls and Burlington Coat Factory. It tends to be hit or miss but when I hit I have gotten great clothes ar great prices.

Sometimes when shopping en femme I have had female SAs compliment me on my outfits.

[Lisa.Stevenson]

In a larger city like where I live now I have no problem going into any store and buying female clothing, makeup, or whatever really. Back in my home town was a totally different story. the population is only 5,000 people so you always tend to feel more.. recognizable so the few times I did buy female clothing there I would do the old "make up a derpy excuse that you just happen to say out loud near the cashier" routine. Those were the days..

[Ellie52]

Sue, I'm not scared anymore, I don't give a damn what people think anymore. When I arrive home with new shoes or a skirt/suit my wife just raises her eyebrows or says that's nice dear. I am on the road everyday so have a great choice of areas in which to shop. Ellie

[Tallulah Rose]

I started buying things in my teenage years, before internet shopping became a thing. I learned pretty quickly that I had nothing to worry about. Shops want your money, that's all.

I always shop in boy mode, because girl mode is strictly indoors for me. I enjoy shopping with my wife, too and we both buy nice stuff. The only slight complaint I get is from my wife, when I'm just a little too indiscreet by talking too loudly about how I would 'totally wear that!' in public. Oops.

I feel positively wonderful if I'm in the lingerie department, even if my wife is doing the shopping. Being surrounded by such lovely things, I love it.

I'm not gloating, though. I understand we all have different fears and this can be a big thing for some people.

[Kim81]

I'm not scared of buying female clothes but if its for me then I much rather have my SO blessing.

[Karen__Starr]

I felt uneasy back in my early teenage years but after several outings it was no big deal. Still remember purchasing foam breast forms and bra in male mode (was about 12 years old) but from what I can remember drew no undue attention.

[Edm_Jamie]

It's like when you ask a kid "what are you doing" and just by the reaction on their face, you know they were up to something wrong even though you have no idea what they've done. So when I shop in drab mode, it's important to not think you are doing something wrong, otherwise if a shop clerk asks if you need any help, you don't want to end up dropping everything and running for the door!

[suchacutie]

As fate would have it, I was married for 33 years before Tina arrived so I had a long history of buying anything and everything for my wife. I had gotten some strange looks perusing in the pantyhose/stocking aisle at times but I just stared back in righteous defiance at the time. If an SA asked if I needed help I would take the help if I needed it. When I did accept assistance they were universally impressed that I had the nerve and ability to shop for my wife for anything and everything.

Transferring that now to Tina is easy unless I need to try something on. With shoes we keep to the "no-fly zone" since it's clear they are for me, but SA's have always been very helpful. For clothes I just shop in a store with a mens changing room.

Outside of trying things on, it's all a matter of confidence from what I've experienced.

[pernille d]

Like everyone Else says shopping in drab becomes easy ... Changing areas Can still be a problem as i find they are staffed by the new Young workers that have just started and there Always hard work ... Humor and boldness is the best approach.. The Other thing i notice is. Men buying for there female half. Go to the clothing guess the size and take the style to the checkout ... Shop assistents know whats up When a man looks long and hard at things and uses time to decide is this the Right colour for me .....its a dead giveaway and so is looking through the lingeri sales section :-).

Worst thing for me is is fear of work colleges seeing me shopping .. Never happened before but happened twice in an hour in the same shop. Talking to a sales assistent becomes easy after talking to a College and hopping they dont ask about the skirts in your basket. ....

[EmilyS]

Lord I've never had a problem buying female clothing. I've bought many a clothing gift for my wife. Buying female shoes on the other hand used to give me pause. I've gotten over that though.

[immike]

I find it easier to purchase womens clothing online,where you can stay anonymous.I buy skirts,tops,pantyhose,heels online&
have it delivered to my place,where I live alone

[Rachel_B]

When I first started CD back in my teens, I purchased everything online for the most part. When I got older though I ventured into stores and if asked about the items, I would always say they were for somebody. A couple years ago, I started buying bras at Victoria's Secret and would always say that they were for somebody until one day I mustered the courage to ask a SA what color bra would look good on me and since then, shopping there has always been fun(granted most of the time I present myself as female). There have been issues with going to a store to try something on before I decided to buy. I went to a Maurice's one time in guy mode and asked if I could try on a skirt and the SA said that I couldn't and needed to buy them and said I can return them if I didn't like them. I went back to that same store a different day dressed as female and was allowed to try them on there. Another store I visit to drool over clothing(its expensive) is White House Black Market and there is a SA there that honestly believes that I am female and made a comment that she loved my blue eyes and that she hated blue eyes on men.... all I could think was "If she only knew the truth".. I seem to be getting off topic alittle. When I finally started to really buy female clothing, I wasn't scared because if I could ask a Victoria's Secret SA about what color a bra would look on me, I knew everything after that would be easy

[JackieMilton]

In the beginning (3 years ago) i was nervous about buying panties and intimate clothing. But after while it got easier. I have found some stores are easier than others. One of favorites is Maurices, the girls greet me by name, help find the right outfit and color, make sure every fits just right. another is Victoria Secrets for panties,lotion,body wash. they know I am buying for myself and assist me selecting whatever. I have found if you aren't nervous or act like it is a big secret, no matter where you will treated right. I fitted for a corset in Fredericks by not 1 but both clerks, course i was a thong at the time so that may be it. How many senior citizens wear thongs?

[Janine cd]

I was apprehensive about buying feminine clothes until I went to a Penneys store a while ago and bought an assortment of bras on sale. The salesperson asked if I had found everything that I was looking for and I assured her that I had. When she was ringing up the sale , she commented that I had selected an assortment that would look lovely on me. I thanked her and was very proud of my response.

[suzanne]

How I wish this wasn't an issue! Shopping for femme clothes, on a scale of ten, is a twelve. Shopping for male clothes is a one. I just want to get in and out ASAP. Ten minutes is too friggin long. In my favorite women's store, an hour goes by in a flash. The SAs in that particular store all know my by my male name, and I go there dressed in either femme or drab, doesn't matter. They now tell me that when I pop in to shop, they mention it the next day to those co-workers that werent there. Their response is like, "Darn! I missed him!". When I want to try something on, my SA immediately takes my selections to "Start a fitting room" for me while I hunt for more. When I go in and try something on, she offers her expert opinion about how well it works on me. The rest of the staff always wants to see how I look and they now treat me like a friend, not a customer. As with any female customer, some things work, most do not, and sometimes, nothing works, but you have to try it on to be sure. IMHO, there is no substitute for this part of the process. On line shopping is out of the question for me.

My wish for all the girls in this forum is that you all find the courage to shop that one first time. You will be very quickly put at ease and soon find yourself wondering why you ever hesitated. Just go in there and be ready to answer the question, "How can I help you?" Try responding with "I want to find a dress in size (your size here)". Remember, you have just as much right to be there as any female customer. Its really that simple and easy. Please go!

[Dana L]

For a second I get nervous but then I start looking at all the clothes and forget about it. I've shopped for my daughter and my wife so many times I just tell myself it's no different. I still prefer my wife to come with. Although I take my things over to the mens section to try on. Placed under a mens shirt or pants as I walk in the dressing room. One time I picked out this cute outfit and we were right next to the womens dressing room. There was no one around so my wife said just go in. So I did, the outfit looked great. My wife said let me see, there's no one around. So I came out. Just then a lady walked over, I thought I was going to die, when she looked at me and said oh that looks great. After my heart started beating again I thought, wow that wasn't so bad. Still and all I'll take my selections over to the mens dressing rooms from now on. I'm a whimp I know.

[Daphne Renee]

I used to be a very nervous. I remember buying a bra once at wal-mart. In my mind I thought someone is going to figure it out.. Now I just buy whatever I want. The price is what scares me now.