But you should accept the rope that is thrown thrown and/or warn others not to go there...
and again you make the assumption that the SO knows...you don't know they know. Main point here is that they should have the right to be in on the decision early in the relationship. Meh so few here can see the other side, they see what they want to see and they think they know what the SO would want. Think for a minute, if your SO controlled everything assuming they knew what you wanted...
OK doesn't matter, the ground has been covered, the quicksand pit is there and the signs have been posted. I assume you know not to walk there.