Why do i always feel sexual when i crossdress ???

[Laura Collette]

Cross dressing has always felt sexy to me. I only dress in private at home and when I have the time I love to just spend time as my female self. I get distracted and forget that I'm wearing makeup, then I feel my earrings swinging and my hair (wig) brushing my neck and just feel like an attractive woman, sort of a delicious surprise. My fantasies have been about having sex with a woman as a woman. More recently I imagine being a GG and having sex with a man. I love imagining the submissive posture and the opening I imagine a GG feels. I am heterosexual and married and have no sexual interest in men except when I'm Laura and then it's only a fantasy. When I imagine being attractive to men I'm telling myself that Laura is attractive and desirable, which makes me feel good about myself.
One significant fact is that my marriage is a celibate one for reasons of my wife's unrelated to my cross dressing, but I have sexual urges and have found that this is a good way to direct them while remaining faithful. I love my wife more than anything.
I think that men in our society are so strongly socialized not to be attractive or attracted to men that many of us "straights" have to get out of our male personae in fantasy in order to free up those feelings. I could go on and on but the short answer is yes, sexual feelings sure are part of the CD experience for me.

[Annaliese2010]

No there's nothing wrong with that IMO. I feel the same sexual explosiveness (who doesn't?) but I never fantasize about men, just other M2F transgendered girls and..well GG's as well. I'm a lesbian I guess huh? Anyways don't be confused, just do it. BE who you are. It's ok. Celebrate yourself (but be safe).

[kellibra]

krististeph... beautifully said. so true

[Barbara Dugan]

I love the sexual side of crossdresing..I have trouble believing that for some crossdresing is not sexual at all, perhaps not all the time but I bet on occasions you can't help it

[KaceyR]

Heavy analysis ahead...

My side is kind of half and half... started with a fetish attraction to lingerie and nylons/pantyhose.
But he other half is the adoration of girls' feminine side and their 'power' of expression altogether.
The sheer fact that they can dress up in so many styles and be free to be so expressive
(generally and emotionally) is what has got me into working to full CDing mode rather
than just underdressing.

While I've had my own stronger emotional/empathic side, it's not what I ever really "expressed" outwardly.
And in my life I guess I've been too "quiet" in social outings or too much "to myself" at times.
(probably why I've stayed single all my life).
I feel I can express that side more by being Kacey and CDing is allowing a good outlet for this.

But that fetish side's still there.. every time I put on the pantyhose or nylons.. gotta spend a few
seconds just running my hands on my legs for the thrill of the sensation.
(and then a bit of disappointment as I put my jeans on over them to head into work). Still feels good but..

Sometimes just feel so itchy to get out sometime and let my nylon'ed legs out for air!
But I'm too new yet at all this. Sometime tho.

As far as the full en femme fantasies.. I don't know. It's great to think of the the "attractiveness" you get
as a female. Half is the fact that you're what's attracting them, and the other half is the fact that you have
"the power" as a female.
I mean (and probably over analyzing again as I tend to do),
If I was an attractive GG out there, and getting hit on by guys (or gals), the few thoughts I can see in a dating situation is:
1: "I'm loving being able to attract the interest of people " (being wanted or being the attraction)
2: "I'm loving the power and control here...They are having to get _my_ OK for them to be with/near me". (in general, not even fully getting "into bed with").
3: "maybe this person can provide care/nurturing for me"
As a guy, I don't think these sides are thought of as much. But it's an emotional need.
Women by nature, are freer to act on these needs.
In general, guys operate in a more straightforward, logical way. We have the same needs technically, but repress them or hide a lot of them (or hide the public display at least).
But if they get more in tune emotionally then these things also can be recognized.. but without methods or natural ways to express them.

So this pushes into the fantasy side more. .
CDing does this, the feeling of attractiveness, of the power or control, and in the end the pleasure and nurturing that was gained as a result from "being a woman".

Myself, I can say I've had some similar fantasies. It's not all the time..but it's there.
My other thought on this literal sexual side gets me thinking of the fact that if one were to compare the "sensations" felt during sexual acts by a GG compared to a guy, they've got us beat. Potential sensitivity, length of reactions, sensations, all wrapped into and tied into their emotional being frankly kind of makes me jealous. It's a side we'll never experience ourselves. So that side of longing also fuels my own occasional fantasies. Possibly some of that is involved in your situation too.

Granted..I've also probably aligned more with being somewhat Bi as opposed to straight hetero (even before CDing recently). But it's a rough definition at best for me when I don't act anywhere but my fantasies. Overall, it's been the emotional linking that has the biggest impact for me for my fantasies..not the physical plumbing aspect.

Cripes..I type a lot. Sorry... Now on to chapter 2.... just kidding

[boone]

I do feel same too. But I'm trying keep it secret for now.

[susiecd13]

I agree with that also. I don't get the chance to dress often but when I do I fantasize about being a woman and being treated like one.

Susie

[jennloves55]

That feeling seems to grow more and more as I get older. I have found that in the past few years I dream of having a sexual relationship while dressed. For me it would be with another CD or even two. Just the thought of our stocking covered legs rubbing together get me so aroused. I have yet to act on these fantasies but maybe someday...

[Emma500]

When dressed enfemme, I definitely start to fantasise about being a woman. From there it moves on quite quickly to start imagining that I'm with a guy, with me as the woman.

[nylon boy]

The first experience i can remember is when i was really young say 4 years old,running my toy car around the floor until it stopped at my ma's friends legs i dunno why but i ran the car up her legs of course innocently ! (needless to say she was wearing nylon tights/pantyhose) and a pink silk slip ill never forget the way it felt..!

It wasnt until i was 13 years old that for some reason or another while in the house on my own one evening i tried on a pair of nylons and thats when my addiction started....never not once since then have i been able to resist temptation to crossdress...99% of the past comments on this thread make so much sense to my situation....i think my adoration for the female form drives my need for my female alter ego and as long as i live i will enjoy Lexie as much as i can and i advise like minded people to do the same as its just who we are...dont surpress your feelings as it leads to sadness and frustration xxx xxx

[Wezzcott]

I used to dress just for the sexual thrill when I was younger. However now, yes it does still turn me on, but after I have been turned off.., I still love being dressed. So I think now, I just love dressing whether there is a sexual urge or not.

[Gillian Gigs]

Why do I always feel sexual when I crossdress??? Mainly, because for you it is a sexual thing. Pavlov rang the bell, fed the dog, the dog salivated, eventually the dog would salivate when the bell was rung, it's called conditioned responce. Not meaning to be crude but, get dressed, play with self, get the climax, and have the endorphins flood your body giving you a peaceful feeling. This gets ingrained within you until, now when you get dressed everything wants to progress to the point of having an endorphin release and we all know what has to take place to get it!

This is strictly my opinion, based on my experiences. If there is any conciliation for you in this, it is that as you get older the "foreplay" can stretch out at first into hours, then into days. I would liken it to instead of getting one big endorphin flood at climax, the endorphins drip into your system slowly over a long period bringing peaceful, relaxed, calmness. It really is the clothes that is doing it, because they are so closely related to the whole experience. You then reach a point after who knows how long where that slow drip is not enough, and you fall back on the old habits to get that flood!

Whether you call it endorphins, or dopamine, it is a naturally occuring drug produced by our bodies. Runners run until it kicks into their system. Thrill seekers get it from doing what they do, as in sky diving, bungy jumping, etc. It is also produced during sex. Aside; what would it be like having sex, while skydiving, what a rush!!! If you looked at it from the prospective that you were a junky, you would quickly figure out what was needed to get your fix. So why is CDing sexual for you, because you made it that way through your repeated behavior!

PS: don't beat up on yourself over it, as you have read, so have many others followed the same path also...me too.

[Blake Lively]

I normally don't dress a whole lot. But when I put on some thigh high stockings and my pair of high heels a switch just turns inside me. I feel so sexy. And the heels gotta be tall though. The ones I have are 6 inches tall. Anything less and the "switch" doesn't get turned. Love the feeling of the stockings on my legs as well. Can't describe it, just feels soothing to me.

Blake

[Confucius]

It is a neurological response. Simply put your brain is hardwired to interpret cross-dressing as actual contact with a female.

This is not just role playing. It is not in your imagination. It is a true biological response. Your neural synapses are connected in such a way that your brain releases dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and other neurotransmitters which produces sensations of well-being, pleasure, sexual gratification and bonding. It affects the reward centers of your brain, instant gratification, and thus it mimics the addiction response.

It has nothing to do with psychology. In fact, I'd say that psychologists have tried to classify cross-dressing as some sort of psychological abnormality and have got nowhere with it. They have tried to use psychotherapy to "cure" cross-dressers and got nowhere. That's because it has it biological origin.

The neurotransmitters your brain release are real, and quantifiable. People who do not experience the same sensations think that cross-dressers are all suffering from some sort of fetish where we use our imagination to construct a sexual substitute. That is so wrong!

I believe it is actual a form of synestesia in which one sensory pathway leads to automatic, involuntary experiences in a second sensory pathway. About 95% of male population can put on women's clothing and feel nothing but silly embarrassment, however about 5% of the population experiences something amazing. Their neurons and synapses are connected in such a way to generate an entirely different automatic, involuntary sensory experience. Most likely this neurological pathway was developed during synaptogenesis of critical periods in infancy and/or adolescence. More research is needed, but it is real, and it is a neurological (not psychological) response.

[karens70]

It is always a sexual response for me. what I find is that the way I like to dress up myself (dress, skirt, heels...), is the same way that turns me on when I see a woman wearing the same sort of clothing. so there has to be a link there!

[Wildaboutheels]

Evolution 101, plain and simple. Like ALL creatures, we are only on the planet for one reason - to try to carry on our own DNA. [MOST] men's most basic programming is to impregnate as many females as possible which provides the best chance to carry on his own DNA. A MAN's VISION is what has evolved over tens of thousands of years which ALLOWS him to "get ready" with nothing more than glimpses of body parts. A man MUST "get ready" if he is going to impregnate a female. Female brains DO NOT WORK THIS WAY for their own protection which is why there are so few FtM crossdressers. Wearing/donning Male clothing articles does not "excite" them [the vast majority of them I am "guessing"] and does not allow them just one of many "easy avenues" to an O that almost all men have.

Very few here will deny/have denied [in numerous threads] having an O or 2 or 2 hundred or 2 thousand while wearing female clothing articles. Many here feel/felt guilty about it. Many here have more or less moved on from "it" and seem to be "relieved or happy" about it. WHEN someone started dressing is meaningless. Almost ALL here share the O/vision part of the equation and at least went through a phase of it.

Read enough threads, read enough responses, pay attention to the topics and look at what kinds of pics are popular [and get the most hits] and it's simply impossible to ignore the correlation of clothes/CDer and Pavlov with his whistle and his dogs.

HOW/WHY can folks wonder why CDing becomes addictive? Unless they are simply not paying attention.

A much simpler answer is that we CANNOT control our equipment and/or what "turns us on". Mother Nature simply won't allow it.

[laciewhite]

In my dressing, I'm emulating my dream girl. She's a turn on, that's why she's my "dream girl". She wears stockings, garters, and heels. That really gets my attention.

totally agree with this. when i CD i am trying to achieve that impossible dream girl image, which for me is a particular look associated with glamorous blonde porn models from about 20 years ago.

an image just got stuck in my head and, barring a few minor variations, i always dress in the same way.

and its a total sex/fetish thing for me. no apologies or excuses.

as soon as i've had my 'happy ending' i just wanna get back to being a fella again.

[skirtsuit]

Fortunately, there is much, much more to all of us than neurotransmitters and 'hard wiring'. My brain, if that is really were my mind comes from, is not 'hard wired' at all - and it is all mine!
Thank the stars that the allure of hosiery and other fem things is still with me and as strong as it ever was. If it wasn't sexual, I don't think I'd do it.

One of the things I find fascinating about about going out dressed as a fetish CD is that the public becomes part of the fantasy/fetish.
Best,S

[reb.femme]

I agree with Beverly..That it is natural .... But for the run of the mill cder ( non Trans ) we are men and men are sexually driven... I am attracted to the Feminine aspect of it ,I am and always have been attracted to very feminine women this is what still drives me...

Ditto to what the lady said. I love feminine women......it's always been this way for me. No sexual interest in men but whatever floats your boat is all that matters.

I'm still baffled by aspects of my life but I've given up trying to reason why, as my brain begins to hurt after a while.

Rebecca

[Lacyfem]

I was aroused the first time I put on my first pair of panties at 10. It's no different today when I can dress I definitely feel sexual which I think is natural. Lots of gurls have explained this quite well here so no need to repeat it. It feels good to feel fem and to act out sexually in my opinion. If it's not, then I'm a bad gurl. Thank goodness!

[JennyLynn]

You are so totally normal. Don't sweat it. It's not everybodys thing, but I get it and embrace it. Don't get too hung up on your sexuality. It's okay to want to be loved like a woman. Wish the same here!

[Karren H]

You could probably train yourself to not do that...... get a big hammer and every time you dress and..... whack! Help you develop a trained response to external stimuli..... probably be a lot easier to tuck too! lol

[lisagurl]

for me its very sexual also

[Melissa in SE Tn]

A most normal cd reaction. Enjoy your femininity. Karren , you continue to make me laugh. Peace, melissa

[Bree24]

I also get that wonderful feeling feeling when en femme. Try and embrace it and let yourself feel sexy and excited. I think it would be wonderful to have a man find me attractive and want me when I'm dressed. I don't want to be with a man, but have not been in that situation. Never say never, have fun and enjoy yourself for who you are