i can't buy my own (girl)cloths and wearing sisters cloths is violating her privacy and also i'm going to be very busy.
i can't buy my own (girl)cloths and wearing sisters cloths is violating her privacy and also i'm going to be very busy.
Hopefully only temporary.
We are still here for you.
Dana M
Life is not fair, in this present world. You have to do what you have to do. It is ok, and sometimes good, t abstain from it for a time, and forever, if you need or choose to. We must not let it run our lives, and it surely can! One day at a time, or minute at a time. Replacing it with other important things, is ok, too, for a time.
you have plenty of time, so focus on growing up, becoming independent and then worry about building a wardrobe!
Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.
Eleanor Roosevelt
When I was young there were many times when it just wasn't possible to cross-dress. I even went years without cross-dressing, but no matter how busy I was, it was still there. I believe our brains are just hard-wired to interpret cross-dressing as actual contact with a woman, and it responds by releasing neurotransmitters that give us feelings of well-being, pleasure, sexual gratification and bonding.
My advise to you is to concentrate on developing your social skills, self-confidence, and abilities. Learn how to hold conversations with others, talking about their interests, learn how to dance, learn how to compliment others. Reach out to others who need a friend. Date girls who never get asked out on dates just to develop your social skills. Tell girls that you think they are wonderful and just leave it at that. And finally learn to appreciate all the good things about being a man.
I think those things will be valuable to you all through your life.
That is your choice but it may be harder than you may think. Many of us here know that from experience but there are always exceptions.
Second star to the right and straight on till morning
Confucious , your advice is good, even for old farts like me. I needed that advice decades ago, and can still use it.
Confucius, who are you?
u know me more than i do myself....
thanks for the advice,
some wonderful things u said
Sweetie these things happen, there were times when I could not dress or I would tell myself I shouldn't. The important thing to remember is that you love who you are whether it is en femme or not because their is a lady in all of us you just have to channel that when you can't
"Understanding is the first step toward acceptance." Albus Dumbledore
Part of my journey was 'violating' the rights of other girls. I didn't like that part and don't do that anymore. Of course now I probably wouldn't find any clothes to fit that way anyway.
Hi Rah,
Probably easier to quit breathing, but good luck to you.
See all my photos, read many stories of my outings and my early days at
http://rachelsauckland.blogspot.co.nz
Rah,
I agree about your sisters clothes.
If you are going to be busy earning money you will then be able to afford clothes.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
It would be 100% impossible for any of us here to not have violated someone's privacy at some point in time in regard to wearing their clothes. ALL of us did it! No exceptions. How could a 5 or 6 or 7 year old go out and buy their own stuff? There may be a few exceptions today. I have seen a few shows on TV where TG children of 6 or 7 years old are being allowed to dress and live as their perceived gender. Their parents are supportive and have bought the child clothing that allows for this. But, even in these cases, at some point in time, the parents had to have seen their child's "interest" in the opposite gender clothing. So, we all have done it.
The only difference I'm suggesting to you as that no one told me I was doing that. That I was violating someone's privacy. I FINALLY realized that on my own. You just have the benefit (hopefully you see it that way) of the Internet and this forum and the years of experience that everyone on here possesses. We're able to suggest to you that this is, indeed, what it really is.
Hopefully, you'll be able to work something out that best for you and that works for you. Good luck.
Gonna be hard. I've been there, trust me. The urge and crave will kick in eventually.
see you soon....
Rah...don't worry about dressing in my mind. Yes, you may miss it, but its not the clothes that makes the girl
You may quit dressing, for now, but you will always be a crossdresser.
Hi Rah,
As many have said, this may be harder than you think. Just remember that supressing a desire can be very hard on the psyche, I put my desires away over and over again during a 24 year period before I decided to just live Isha as best as I can. The constant supressing caused great confusion, anger and depression until I could not take it anymore. If you can put CDing away with no issues than I applaud you but please be honest with yourself and if it is causing you emotional distress then embrace it. There are ways to enjoy what we do without violating your sister's privacy. Even if you could afford one outfit and dress on occasion, you may find this is enough until the time comes that you can express that part of you on a more consistent basis.
I wish you luck in your journey.
Hugs
Isha
Its always tough the first few years, when you are not independant, but look forward to the time when you'll be financially independant and will be able to buy your own things. It always kept me going when I couldn't dress.
Quitting is not going to be a problem for now. I would strongly urge and caution you if or when you enter into marriage or relationship to have the open conversation about this side of you.
I would make it clear about what you need to do or may need to do. Even if you seem to think the only amount of CDing you will ever need is to throw on a nightgown once and a while. There can come a time that you might want to go all out in public and I strongly encourage you to have this discussion so you don't have internal marriage problems over this.
Just look at all the problems the members have here.
Launa
rah,
cant or wont buy your own, dont know your whole situation but we're here to help.
dont think that any member here didnt think that they quit at one time or another only to be standing in front of mirror as a girl again.
see that you have been here for over a year, you must have learned to accept by now, if its finance you have thrift stores, privacy ive hid clothes all my life, shopping-buy most of my stuff while doing x-mas shopping. its for my auntie or my sister, gift cards are so cold and thoughtless.
but just dont make my mistake, be open to whomever you choose to live and "share" your life with, then you may do so with no regrets.
....Mykell
i dressed like a girl and i liked it!crossdressing...theirs an app for that
I "quit" for a period of about 10 years, maybe dressing three times total in that period, mostly due university and living at home while working. Also, I didn't fit very well in my sister's leftover clothes anymore, didn't have the courage to buy my own.
Now I dress pretty much every day.
Best wishes,
Kat
Confucius, this is such thoughtful and good advice. I'm a shy married senior and am taking it to heart (all except the part about dating!)
Second hand stores, especially charity shops like Salvation Army, don't care what you are buying, and prices can be very inexpensive.
One more thing. When one lives with family, or roommates, the desire to dress is far stronger, than when you finally have your own place. At least, that is how it has been for me, and some others on here. There is something about wanting the "forbidden fruit" , but, when we finally have our own clothes, and place, the desire is not as strong, and we can go days, or weeks without it! Human nature. Who can know it!?
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