My mom is part of a support group and shared this message her friend wrote. I thought I would share it with you all.
Trans 101
Our sexuality (yes, we are sexual beings) has 3 main components. The first is our physical sex, which is usually determined by the doctor or midwife checks to see if we are an innie or an outie. The second is our sexual orientation, or who we are attracted to, boys or girls. The third is our gender identity, whether we feel masculine or feminine. An easy way to think about this is that our physical sex is what’s between our legs, our sexual orientation is what’s in our heart, and our gender identity is what’s between our ears.
While the three of these components are related, and they do communicate with each other, they are each independent. One does not determine the others. A person can be an outie, be attracted to innies, and feel feminine, just as another person can be an innie, be attracted to other innies, and feel very masculine, or any other combination of the three.
Something also, that we need to remember, is that we live in an analog world. Nothing in nature exists as either/or, everything is on a spectrum. This includes our sexuality. Some people, born with ambiguous genitalia, or both male and female genitalia, are sometimes referred to as intersex. There was a prominent case a few years ago, of an African runner that was disqualified from running in the Olympics when she failed a drug test and was accused of using testosterone, charges that she flatly denied. Upon medical examination, she was found to have female genitalia on the outside, but internally she had partially developed male sex organs.
Most people are attracted exclusively to either men or women, while some are attracted to both men and women. Of the latter, some may be more attracted to men than women, and others may be more attracted to women than men.
Likewise, some people feel both masculine and feminine, some more masculine than feminine, and others more feminine than masculine. While I cannot speak personally to sexual orientation, I do know from personal experience that gender identity can be fluid. There are times that I feel more masculine than feminine, and other times when I feel more feminine than masculine. Generally I have no control over this, it is not dependent on how I’m presenting, nor the situation I’m in. I have been in jeans and a t-shirt, sweating and getting grimy while working hard doing very macho work, and suddenly felt very “girly”. There have been times when I’ve been dressed to the nines with a nice dress, hose and heels, and suddenly felt very macho. A specific incident happened as I was getting ready for the Women’s Retreat before the GCN Conference. While putting on my makeup I suddenly felt very masculine. I had this sudden bit of apprehension as I realized that did not pack any guy clothes. Even if I had, I was going to a women’s retreat, and couldn’t very well go as Xxxxx. When this happens, when my outward presentation does not match my inward feelings, I feel out of balance.
The term transgender is a very broad category that refers to anybody whose inward gender identity does not match the physical sex they were assigned at birth. Within this broad category there is a broad range of people:
Transsexuals have a gender identity that is the opposite of their physical sex. They may be birth assigned as male but identify as female, or birth assigned as female and identify as male. They may or may not have the need or ability to transition (change their body to match their gender identity through surgery or medication), or they may partially transition.
Dual genders or bi-genders identify as both masculine and feminine. They may or may not partially transition, and may present as either masculine or feminine, or both simultaneously (androgynous).
Gender queers may identify as dual/bi-gender, or they may identify as genderless.
Crossdressers present, either occasionally or more than occasionally, as the gender opposite their birth assigned sex. They may or may not identify as dual gender, but generally have no desire to transition. The term “transvestite” is outdated and often has negative or insulting connotations.
Drag queens and drag kings are entertainers, often professional or semiprofessional, that perform while presenting in the gender opposite their birth assigned sex. They may or may not identify as transgender.
As you can see, there is considerable overlap among the transgender sub-categories. This is largely because many of these terms have been developed by people within the transgender community. There has been precious little research of the transgender community, and most of the terminology has literally been “made up” as we try to figure out and put our feelings into words. For this reason, the definitions that I’ve used may be different than those used by others. There are many more terms that are being used within the community or to describe segments of the community, some that, I’m sure, I’m not aware of, some that are just confusing
I hope this helps you to understand, that I didn’t muddy the waters more.
Grace,
xxxxxx
