Couda, woulda, shouda! I'm happy now and comfortable and have a bunch of clothes. As many of you did I threw alot away and restarted several times but have it good now. I don't know if I would be the same person if I had begun really dressing earlier. But! We just got a new house and I told my wife I wanted a vanity and a walk in closet for my stuff and I think I may get at least part of that if I share the space with her. I did say for her to keep out of my things and I would keep out of hers.
I would have transitioned as a teenager and lived full time as a woman.
Not done everything in my power to ignore how I felt inside pretty much the whole of my adolescence and teenage years, and 3 years ago when I couldn't ignore it any more just giving into it instead of forcing it away.
I would have gone through with the castration that I almost attempted but stopped due to fear of pain...
I wish I would have told my wife years earlier. She was very accepting (after a short time of worrying) and she says that we could have had a lot of fun if she had known when we were both younger.
Would have been more forward when men approached me. My one regret is that i shied away from lots of encounters
I would have tried to understand myself and be mindful what I was experiencing. Most importantly I would have been upfront with my wife early on; regardless of how very limited my CDing was back then. However with all that being said 20 years ago I didn't know what this CDing thing was or that there were other's in the world that had similar feelings.
I always managed to tell the women I was seriously involved with from about the mid-1980s onward. Looking back, it was a mistake to tell my mother. So I would not do that again. I have not purged since about '98. But the ones before that were costly. I don't know if that could be avoided given the same societal pressures, socialization. I think that just goes with the territory.
I had some really nice stuff that went down to the landfill though.
I would told all my wife's and made sure they knew Glenda was here to stay and not to try and change me before I married them. My wife knows but will not let me let Glenda out.
GLENDA
I FEEL LIKE A WOMAN
For me, I would definitely go back to my teen years and been more outgoing and express/explore my feminine self more.
I would have bought a house with more and bigger closets.
I wish I was not the closeted me that I was in the 1990's. So much denial.....not good.
What you see in my avatar photo to the left is who I really am.
I'm trying to get my head round what scares a woman so much about CDing I'll post it when I do. I told my wife at forty one after thirty years of solitary confinement. I sobbed my heart out but at the end it felt like a ton weight off my shoulders, I tried gently to bring her into my world, I tried to convince her that the clothes and her were very intimately linked. After I told her I fell deeply in love with her all over again but I didn't get the same response back. That began to hurt, I had stopped hiding and lying about cding and I wanted to share my renewed feelings for her. Sadly the solitary confinement cell grew again so here I am talking to people who do understand so we can help each other and I can share the funnier side of it.
YUP YUP YUP! What everyone said especially if we all could go back with what we know now...... we'd all be sitting "pretty". I would have told the wife when I proposed, OR I would have never bothered getting married.
Wish I had started dressing fully at a much earlier age. Wish I had started going out and actively meeting others much earlier than I did. Wish I had bought a personnel computer and connected to the Internet thing (BBS's back then) than from when I finally did.
Sarah[SIZE="3"][/SIZE]
"Sport is for men.......But Ballet is for women" ---- George Balenchine
wish I would have started earlier, and looked for a support group earlier on
Start dressing sooner. I would not have worried as much about what other people thought. I would have experimented, learned, developed myself better, deeper. I would have fully enjoyed my experiences and been more open to others. I would have dressed frequently, expressed myself more openly and confidently. I would have explored every aspect of crossdressing that intrigued me and develop a self awareness of who I am. I am still learning and growing. I wish I had allowed myself to start earlier.
I would have invested in skin care products sooner. I also would have kept my weight down. Things get harder as I get older.
A few years ago I fully accepted who I was. Once that occurred, I was able to live with peace of mind. It's allowed for a much more enjoyable experience. All the inner turmoil is gone. I wish I would have realized this acceptance a decade earlier. All the inner strife is emotionally draining and just exhausting. The continual cycle of purging/reemerging/purging is a waste of time and effort. I'm glad that's behind me now.
For Me. I should have started dressing many years sooner. I always had the desire from early on to dress but never had the nerve.
Also wish i could have joined this forum sooner.
Shelly
So many chances..one that sticks out is I wish when I was in high school I would have done one of those dress as the opposite sex days for school. As a closeted CD that would have been a perfect excuse to get my girl on
I'm with you, if realized who I really was at a younger age I would have liked to transition before puberty but I started to CD in my early teens while realizing that I was female on the inside. Right now, I am in the process of getting BA but thats probably for another thread.Originally Posted by LaraPeterson
Start on HRT 20 years ago.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Emily
We're the ones who start little fires, yet they burn out
But when they're on the rise, we can't help but shine
And when the wave approaches, take our ashes to the ocean
Who cares if hell awaits? We're having drinks at heaven's gate
"Modern Jesus" Portugal (The Man)
I'm also in the wish I would have started earlier boat but I was pretty clueless about it until after I started under dressing regularly and then started experimenting more heavily. Looking back though on things I did when I was younger, it's a wonder I never thought about being a crossdresser...
I think this captures it for me. The biggest difficulty was not being able to recognise my true self at an early age. I thought it was just a fetish and could be controlled or that being in the right heterosexual relationship would make all of these feelings and desires go away. Perhaps if I had been able to gain access to some good and thoughtful counsellor I might have been able to understand myself sooner.
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