This holiday season, especially Christmas is a double downer for me, and a few others, too. For one, am isolated for being a dresser, and, the other, because I don't celebrate Christmas, and isloated. I feel like the oddest person in town. Any one else similar to me?
Alice you dont have to celebrate christmas. Just do your best to enjoy the holidays.
I go with Shelly on this one. What other time of year (In Western culture) can you find that most friends, neighbors and strangers try to put their best foot forward? Try to love their fellow man or woman? Put aside, even for the moment, hate, envy, grievance and the like, in order to offer a loving face to another? Savor the best in man while you can. Does it really matter which religion, or two, promulgated this joyful period of the year? Accept the best that our world is able to offer.
Julie
Not a CD or a TG but an Athenist
I don't celebrate the winter holidays for several reasons, check you wikipedia on thm , and it is putting way too much unecessary pressure and financial stress on the masses, and road rage, and impatience, and family stresses. I am glad i don't have to partake of it anymore, and have peace.
Well then in that case, Alice, Shelly and Julie, happy December 25th to you all. And may all your December 25th's be merry.My wife and I do xmas decorations and enjoy the day with each other but we've created our own traditions for today. And none have anything to do with mainstream tradition.
Peace to all.
Carla
I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!
I understand how you feel Alice I don't celebrate the season as it is but do honor what it stands for in a religious sense.
Alice, you are definitely not the odd one, just look at all the post on this site. There are many like you, including me. Keep you head up girl! The Holidays will be over soon!!
I have never celebrated Christmas and even as an adult, it still feels a little wierd. This was my SOs first Christmas without family. So, we followed a time honored tradition in my ethnic group: went to the movies and had Chinese food after! It was a lot of fun; no commercialism, no running around to family celebrations, and lots of time to just be grow ups.
Like you, Alice, I do what I want to do and it makes me feel great.
Susan GG
Though I celebrate Christmas, I use it as a time of reflection, thinking about the year gone by. Think about the good things that has happened in your life. Think about the fact that you're here today. That's something to celebrate.
I'm getting better with age. I may have started late, but better late than never!
"Don't let anyone define who you are".
I celebrate christmas only because I have my family with me. None of the family are believers, and I think most of us simply consider it to be a marketing ploy in the guise of a holiday.
BUT!, we are happy together. We share gifts, hope for a better next year and wish we had the wherewithal to solve every problem in the world - but we don't, so we simply try to do what we can.
When writing the next chapter in your life, start with a pencil and eraser - my first page as Miki is full of eraser marks.
I prefer solitude. I enjoy holidays with immediate family, but not visiting or interacting with family I have not talked with very often...to me, it adds too much stress, pretending to be nice and it is not really the time I want to catch up...I feel bad sometimes ignoring people, but I feel worse when I interact and either their expectations or mine are not met...so I'm telling people I'll get back to them sometime in January.
Chickie
There is good advice here. First, there are many different holidays that happen this time of year. Christmas has both a spiritual and a secular side to it, Winter Solstice, Hanukah, and more. Second, you can celebrate whatever your friends are celebrating, and you can make it your own "inspiration" season. Some people will greet you with Merry Christmas. You don't need to celebrate Christmas to greet them back the same. I greet my Jewish friends with Happy Hanukah, even though I don't celebrate it. People who are your friends will not be upset if you greet them Seasons Greetings, Happy Holidays etc. The important part of the season, is just spending time with people who are important to you. No need to push limits, argue particulars, its a season of love. whether family, friends or just people who inspire you, celebrate life.
I come from a mixed religious family and as such have lapsed in both domains. For me the holidays are just that . . . time to share, enjoy family and friends and for one small microcosm of time bask in the nice side of human nature where everyone is genial and kind (well not everyone but for the most part some). As far as feeling pressured by sales gimmicks and "buy, buy, buy" this time of year, I just ignore all that do what I have to do and get back to those great meals, parties, family and friends.
Hugs
Isha
This was my first Christmas totally alone. DIDN'T LIKE IT. I was divorced 3 years ago and she isolated me from all of her side of family, except one. This is my ex-sister-in- law, now considered my sister. She lived here for two years, due to necessity, and now she has remarried and moved across this great state of ours to be with hubby. Can't find fault with that.
Last Thanksgiving I dried myself out and had been sober until now. Also came out to my world as transgender, quit smoking, started therapy and am now on hormones and blockers. I wasn't sober yesterday and I looked like a chimney, my own pity party. Now that the hangover is gone I am putting my foot in the stirrup and getting back on the horse again. I've worked too hard to be where I am and this, hopefully not happen again. I don't mind living alone, but what I can't stand is being lonely. I am going to take steps to remedy this in the future. Life is just too great overall to allow this set back control me. Attitude adjustment is in the works, a new year is just around the corner, and I am really looking forward to it.
Best to everyone for the new year
Bobbi
This time of year can be an emotional train wreck for all of us.
Think of happier times and shed the blues.
Alice! You can do it.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
Make it celebrate Alice Torn day, get a gift for your self or a lot of gifts for your self, open one each day.
I totally clbrate the season and revel in the chance to share with family and rekindle relationships with those I seldom see. The holidays, whatever significqnce to different religious groups, and despite the commercial excess, remain mostly about sharing love. The adverse conditions..financial stress, depression or rage you refer to are the product of people putting the emphasis on something other than that.
Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.
Eleanor Roosevelt
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