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Thread: giving up crossdressing\purging

  1. #1
    Aspiring Member tiffanynjcd24's Avatar
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    giving up crossdressing\purging

    In general, I had read articles online that mtf crossdressers stop dressing up for good being that they are not passable, they feel that no transwoman or genetic woman would want to date a crossdresser due to the fact they are attractive to regular men and that cross-dressing is addictive. Moreover, mtf crossdressers purge their female clothing items because they feel ashamed of themselves and the fact that they cant be their true selves around others.

    My question is has anyone thought about giving up crossdressing for good or realize that crossdressing a part of you?

  2. #2
    Dreams can come true Dana L's Avatar
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    It's true the harsh reality sometimes can make us come to the logical decision to purge and get on with an atypical male life. Crossdressing is part of us we can't turn it off forever. Even if you don't dress anymore you'll always wish you could and end up being unhappy for it. It's like Brett favre trying to retire.

  3. #3
    Aspiring Member tiffanynjcd24's Avatar
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    That is true, I know for a fact that crossdressing part of me for rest of my life. My only thing in which I express it so many times, is to find a mtf transgenders or a woman to accept my crossdressing.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Tiffany,
    Dressing is just a part of me, I am lucky that I am a slight build and fair complexioned.

    Most purge when some other interest comes along and they think it will all be redundant.
    When the other interest wanes, they then regret their actions.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  5. #5
    Aspiring Member tiffanynjcd24's Avatar
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    I understand and i glad you accept yourself

  6. #6
    Member Allison_Leslie's Avatar
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    well honies I look at it this way, I did my time married 8, almost 9 years.. and I can't turn this off now that Ive crossed from CD into Trans-G at least WANTING to get the op.. but even as I can't afford it until a new career comes along, I figure its better to walk through a jungle full of briars than it is to fly easily over terrain the WRONG way.. so I for one will weather this storm and go the distance and one day I WILL be a full female, I have promised myself at least that much.

    I don't care what others think really honestly was raised to fear nothing. I don't even fear death or persecution, I laugh and carry on... and it intimidates the snot out of all those who can't handle one who questions something as final as their own gender. .but I DO. And I offer this : DO NOT PURGE.. .. if its in you, its going to still be in you even if you're pretending its not. I will die happy and with one who loves me or I will STILL DIE HAPPY and alone, doing MY thing.
    --------------------------------------------
    With Love and Affection, Allison Leslie

  7. #7
    Aspiring Member tiffanynjcd24's Avatar
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    I agree they should be happy at all times

  8. #8
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
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    When younger, I gave up cross dressing for ever many of times! Well ''forever'' didn't last very long! When I finally realize it's who I am I quit trying to quit!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

  9. #9
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    I've stopped dressing several times for years at a time. However, I've always had it in the back of my mind. There were times I just wasn't able to easily get back into it, living arrangements, relationships, etc. I've absolutely thought about getting older, and if it will affect my desire to dress, I envision Lilly a specific way, I don't know how I'll feel when she can't fit that picture anymore.

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member ShelbyDawn's Avatar
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    I have given up completely and purged everything twice in the past couple of years and now I am sitting at my computer on this forum wearing panties, hose, bra with forms and a very cute shorty lace nightgown, so I'd say yes.
    After a couple years of therapy, I have come to realize that this is just a part of me and always will be. I just needed to find a balance in my life where my CD does not cause issues in other areas; i.e., when I go camping with my son's scout troop, the nightie stays home.

    When the next urge to purge comes along I plan on following the advice given by some very wise ladies on this forum and just box everything up and put it in the garage because I know I will need it all again and it is really expensive to start over.



    Shelby

  11. #11
    Silver Member
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    I enjoy crossdressing and do not wish to give it up. I feel I am fortunate to be a crossdresser. It is an important part of who I am and what I do.

  12. #12
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    Hello, I too have managed to stop for many years having dressed mainly in stockings from the age of 14-15, now I'm in my 40's I feel the need to go further, having acquired heels, dresses and other underwear, I'm looking at wigs and makeup to get the complete look, I think it will always be a part of me to dress from time to time getting more frequent and more complete.

  13. #13
    New Member ColetteB's Avatar
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    Well, I'm 6foot2, 295+ pounds, and rather hirsute, with a full beard. I doubt I could ever pass even if I tried. Unless passing meant "broad shouldered lady who should've played football in high school."

    But I'm not going to give it up. Besides, I happen to have GORGEOUS natural long hair (which random cashiers will compliment me on), so at least I've got that going!

    I will also endorse an anti-purge. I miss still my first bra. :-( Though I probably would've stretched it to death after this many years.

  14. #14
    Member XemmaX's Avatar
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    i did try a few times and always came back to it.

  15. #15
    The non-GG next door.... Candice Mae's Avatar
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    I'm a TS and attracted to GGs only, so TSs are not only attracted to men. But you are probably right about them not wanting to be with a CD.

  16. #16
    Gone to live my life
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    Hi Tiffany,

    I have to echo the others, I don't think we can truly just "quit" as evidenced by the many who have tried an returned. We may be able to find something to fill the void (take our interest away) but this is mainly for the short haul then it is back to being who we were meant to be. I hid this thing for 31 years and emotionally it drained and almost ruined me . . . Isha is now out and has no desire to go back . . . I do not pass whatsoever when out and about but that would never be my cue to give this wonderful feeling of joy and freedom up. So we (my wife and I ) integrate her into our lives as best we can.

    Hugs

    Isha

  17. #17
    Martini Girl Katey888's Avatar
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    Tiffany - easy question to answer. Yes and Yes. Might thin but will never purge again - It is what it is, and while I enjoy it, and it hurts no-one else, it continues...
    Katey x
    "Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
    Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear"
    Stefani Germanotta

  18. #18
    Aussie girl Tasha McIntyre's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tiffanynjcd24 View Post
    In general, I had read articles online that mtf crossdressers stop dressing up for good being that they are not passable
    .

    I don't pass and never will, but I don't really care. My aim is to be myself and feel great doing it

    Quote Originally Posted by tiffanynjcd24 View Post
    My question is has anyone thought about giving up crossdressing for good or realize that crossdressing a part of you?
    Crossdressing has been, is, and always will be a part of me. I am beyond fighting my feelings so I just go with the flow now.

    Tash

  19. #19
    There's that smile! CarlaWestin's Avatar
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    I thought the ultimate purge was throwing out all your drab clothes. Someday! Someday!
    I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
    My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
    And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
    Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!

  20. #20
    Senior Member Krististeph's Avatar
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    I rarely take the time to try to pass, or even go out much, but crossdressing is a big part of who i am, for better or worse. I may occasionally stop dressing for a few weeks, but i'll never stop. I've purged twice when I was very young and didn't know much about what make people crossdress, The only purging I do now is to keep my wife from getting too mad about the space I'm taking up, and it's 'refining the wardrobe' these days, not purging. Although my eye makeup is getting old, I should probably toss some of that too...

    K

  21. #21
    Aspiring Member Julie1123's Avatar
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    I tend to start thinking about purging when I dwell too much on how crossdressing has made my life more complicated. Just need to find a happy medium. Hopefully that will come in time. What keeps me from purging is pretty much the cost. Have spent way too much to just throw it away and knowing that the urges will never go away and I'll eventually just have to spend more if I did purge.

  22. #22
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    My God, who hasn't thought about throwing in the towel??
    It's part of this journey. I did that buy/guilt/purge cycle for so many years I can't remember. It took a long time for me to accept ME and be happy being ME. I'm so glad I did as my wife accepted me and now I'm free to be me whenever I wish (which is much of the time). Right now she's working from home a few feet away and I'm completely dressed sitting here enjoying the forum and chatting with her as well. Life is wonderful once you accept yourself.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  23. #23
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    There have been threads in the past like this "Do you think you will ever stop CDing?". Many say that it is a part of who they are and they will stop when they "pry my cold dead hands..." etc. Surely, there are many, maybe most, CDers that this applies to.
    But there is a group of CDers who may stop CDing some day. For those who are totally or mostly driven to dress by the sexual arousal factor, as age takes its toll on the sex drive, the desire to dress may diminish or end. There may come a time when the payoff isn't worth the effort.
    "I still like women (or the woman I become), I just can't remember why" may be coming to some of us.

  24. #24
    Aspiring Member tiffanynjcd24's Avatar
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    Like i dont know when people like me dress up, to us we want to be happy and comfortable in our own skin. More over it give us a chance to expressing and exploring our trueselves. For me, i went two years without dressing up am i kind upset about it yes but same time i am trying to saving money for time being until i get a place. But i would hate giving up completely due to the fact im not hurting anyone and im trying to be myself. I wish i would have another crossdresser as a friend I can relate to and maybe be roommates(i live in nj where pretty much i cant be myself ). In addition, according to previous posts on here, i feel as its hard to find a woman or transwoman that are into crossdressers

  25. #25
    Silver Member Tina_gm's Avatar
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    I have thought about it a lot, but not as much recently. When I first started to actually dress and was out to my wife, I thought about it almost daily. I had many WTF am I doing moments, I should go back to shoving the damn thing back in its cage and trying to keep it as sedated as possible. I still do have those feelings once in a while, but not as often or as intense.
    Chickens should be allowed to cross the road without having their motives questioned

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