I'm dying to go out dressed. It is all I think about.
I'm dying to go out dressed. It is all I think about.
I am out and about on an almost daily basis. I'm not out to neighbors but I have no problem leaving or returning to my residence. Being out is a large part of my existence. I strive to blend in and view each days outing as a small validation that I am doing something right. I guess to some degree I have succeeded. In four years of almost daily outings I have never had an incident where I was openly challenged. I'm sure I've been read but so what? They don't bother me. I'm now at the point where I go almost anyplace I want, en femme. To those of you considering the big step I suggest you move ahead. Pick your challenges carefully. When you win you will gain confidence and composure. Confidence is what it is all about. It is the most liberating experience of my lifetime. Good luck.
Susan in Phoenix
MALE BY BIRTH.......
FEMALE BY DESIGN
It's extremely important to be able to go out as Marisa, it's part of my need to keep some semblance of balance in my life. To be someone as special as I am and not be able to express myself is just not possible anymore... Being out, is being out!!!
Cross dressing for me is a private affair. I have ventured out fully en femme. The first and only times I interacted with people was at Halloween. Twice I dolled myself up and wnet shopping in the evening. Many years later when my wife was away visiting family in the mid west I went out for evening strolls. I was dolled up. I loved the feeling of the cool fall air caressing my legs. It was fun for awhile, but, the desire subsided. I am content to seek the peace and tranquility of my home and back yard. I do much of my chores totally en femme. Being en femme has become so relaxing and natural I don't even notice I'm en femme. I will say, if I was five foot six and not six foot even, I would venture out more openly.
Can't tell you how many times I got dressed and then chickened out. Getting some makeup dress and accessory help from g&g friends helped my confidence. The first few times I was read I thought I was going to die - but I didn't.
Most people are pretty polite and if you are dressed well enough that they can't be certain you aren't a woman, they will usually treat you as one. Guys generally ignore you unless you are pretty or have big boobs, some women don't notice, some notice and will smile or be friendly, some notice and don't approve but don't say anything.
If it's daytime,clear sunglasses!
Right now it is private for me.
I have only been out once en femme.
Today I bought some makeup and a bra.
Looking forward to going out soon.
Its a defining point in the evolution the facet of my life that is Caden.
Omg today was my first time out and I loved it. First I took my dog for a walk, no one noticed me. Then I went out just by myself, I walked to downtown. While walking a lady yelled mam at me, then asked where a bus stop was. I was so nervous about my voice, I did the best I could and didn't say much except that I thought it was down that way. Well she said okay and continued to walk. A lot of cars passed me, no problems. There was people walking to but no one noticed. I stopped to look at myself in a window and It felt so good to see myself as a girl. It felt so great, now I just want to go out more. It made me feel so happy.
Shawn I feel ya girl, I felt the same this past week in my first outing, I never realized how liberating it was going to be. I don't have lots of chances to go out and not sure how often I will be now that I did it it was a wow moment
So happy for you
Thanks, I've got the walking fem pretty much down pat. just need to work on my voice. But I just can't wait to go stores like Walmart and do some clothes shopping, get the makeup I want and just have fun. Everyone I've told said they had no idea I was a CD. That makes me feel great too
I wish it could be an integral part of my life, but work and other related things prevents that. What has happened is going to anime and other nerdy conventions has become more important to me, because cross-dressing as female characters isn't that unusual and I don't have to worry about running into people from work xD
I've found it more important than I first thought. Not something I can do every day or week, but I find I must get out from time to time for the fun of it and to see friends I have made during my journey.
I'd love to go out in public. It's a dream, but I sometimes think I'm a couple of life times away from being ready.
i have gone out, and it was both scary and exciting. I think that it may happen again,... someday. Right now, it is not that pressing of a need, but I know it can be. I read all your adventures and take pleasure in all of them. Its great, just not for me right now. Why? i have no idea. i am totally content staying at home and in the back yard.
I have gone out a few times, the experience was exhilarating. Enchanting, very enlightening. Every year there was a GLBT celebration at the park near where I lived. (within walking distance). The participants would march down the main street from the courthouse to the park. It put a smile on my face to see the parade. I would think to myself, I should get dressed up and join them. I never had the courage to do so. I eventually did and wow, I never felt more alive than that day. All I was wearing was a leather pleated miniskirt, suntan shade pantyhose (they were low waist kicks, those were the best hose I ever had), a bra, mens shirt and docksiders. I wanted to wear heels but the grounds were not suitable for heels in most places. Best of all the police where there on patrol so I felt safe.
Shortly after that I came out to my ex-sister in law. She said wear what you want when you come over, we don't mind. I must have had 20 outings including Halloween. Basic men's tee shirt, short mini skirt and heels. Those times were great and I was able to go in public as me without hiding who I was. I was not trying to pass as a woman, I just wanted to be me. I had shoulder length hair so no need for a wig. Now I barely have any hair, may consider it now.
I have no idea why just this year I have wanted to go out, but this forum has given me the courage based on others experiences. I have only gone out fully dressed and in makeup/hair in my car, but have gone shopping partially with light makeup several times. I can't explain it, but being in public is extremely gratifying. Acting as a woman just feels wonderful. When ma'amed at a drive through I was on top of the world. When I was ogled by a man, I felt like a REAL woman, although I have no desire to really be one. Adventure? Excitement? Alter ego? All I know is that it is something I wish I had the courage to do many years ago. For you young girls, if you feel like doing it, don't let your fears hold you back, but be smart in how you do it.
I LIVE for being 'out', and I can't imagine not being able to. Originally being from a small island in Florida, going 'out' was usually out of the question. Moving to New York City is the best thing I ever did. It took me just a short while to realize that NOBODY CARES! People have been nothing short of accepting and complimentary! People hold doors open for me, guys (and ladies!) send me drinks.. it's just wonderful! In the beginning, I wouldn't venture out alone, only with girlfriends or in a group. Then one night I was in a position that I had to walk 10 blocks through Hell's Kitchen to meet up with my group. Since that night, I have NO problem being out alone, in fact, I prefer to be alone, as by myself I do not attract any unwanted attention. In the beginning, I mainly went to gay dance clubs as I figured that as 'part' of the LGBT community, I'd be most accepted. The truth is, that's not really the case. I've never had any bad experiences, but I have noticed that many in the lesbian community (in these clubs) seem to feel like we're somehow competing with them, and the gay community (again, in these clubs) are just not interested, usually, in someone who is presenting as female. I always, or usually, felt accepted, but I've found it much more fun and rewarding to just primarily stick with more mainstream places (restaurants, clubs, bars, theatres, museums) and I totally love all the positive attention that I receive from the public!
It's a big ol' milestone for sure. Maybe the biggest since "Maybe I'll try this on..." lol
Facebook me if you like, just mention you're from here.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
I started dressing properly when I was 19.. and one year later, I already had the desire to go outside of my student-room. Thankfully, I had a very supportive girlfriend and that helped me take the first plunge. Because yes... for most of us who get to this point that they want to experience more than the comfort and safety of their homes, it will be a plunge! And you can be fully prepared and take all precautions, but that first time will be an explosive cocktails of excitement, fear, anxiety, joy and other feelings. Whether is this ends up leaving a good aftertaste and an increased desire to go out more.. that's up to each person.
The most important thing (imho) is.. do you really want to go out? If not.. that's cool. Don't feel pressured by others who do go out.
If yes.. then be sensible and be realistic. Don't go to any places or cities where they are not accepting of LGBT people. Dress sensibly if you want to blend in.
Be prepared to get read.. because most of us will get read. Because of the face, the body, the movements, the voice, whatever.
Only you can determine what the risks are if your friends/family/co-workers recognize you.. and if these risks are acceptable. That's why I don't go out in a couple of cities because of the large number of relatives. At this point, it's still better for me that my family doesn't know.
However, most of all... if you do decide to go out... try to enjoy it! The first time.. all that adrenaline surging through your body... there not quite a feeling like that!
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For me it's vital to the dressing femme experience. It took me a long time to pluck up the courage. I would stand with my hand on the door handle for an hour with my heart thumping. Then I would only go out really late when it was dark and there was no one around. Then I would go around the block, then I went to a CD club and after that experience when I met so many nice people (and really enjoyed being chatted up by men) I never looked back. It seems like a lot of trouble to go to the expense and time to dress then not go out. Each small step creates confidence and it gets addictive. I always want to out do the previous experience. My next aim is to go out in the day time. Was thinking last night as I was walking in London in the rain with my cute brolly up, a rainy night or day is a great chance for someone who isnt too confident or might not think of themselves as passable yet to go out as the umbrella covers your you from the neck up to passers by.
I'm to scared to venture out right now,lol
I find it very important and as others say there is a thrill element to it. But mostly gives me a chance to more openly express myself and let the woman in me be free. I don't go out every day or even weekly, but when the chance is there I may get out several times in a month, plus I go to DLV where I can dress openly 7/24 for a week. Very liberating.
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