I'm working on this as well. I've got shoulder length hair and I'm gradually trying more feminine styles. I want to try and incorporate more feminine things into my everyday, but I live at home with conservative parents that I'm not out to so everything I do has to be very gradual to not rock the boat.
There are a lot of good suggestions here. For example, I've wanted to carry a bag of some sort for quite some time. I wonder what I can find that is inexpensive enough for a proof-of-concept, and not obviously girly?
Thanks for the ideas.
Best wishes
I'm surprised someone before MsVal hasn't bought up bags/ purses up to now ! With all this talk of wearing girl pants...surely someone found out - the pockets are minimal and really just for show !
You can buy a medium size bag for laptops etc . for under $30 at Target..I got a decent faux leather "saddle bag" with all sorts of pockets and I take it everywhere. Lot of them being worn by students and execs here in Toronto !!
Now ,I need a larger size ....us girls lug a lot of stuff around..
Linda
twitter : @ lindaesj
Having worn women's past for the past few weeks, I'm finding that With some brands I can't use the pockets to hold everything. Luckily I do have a laptop bag from work that I can use. I also often wondered why GG's always put their cell phones in their back pockets, now I know why.
This sounds a lot like how I dress. I find women's tops sometimes hard to fit, but I wear women's jeans all the time and my shorts are all women's. I even wear nylons with the shorts sometimes. For shoes, Bass pennyloafers are very unisex, but I also wear ballet flats and mary-janes. Never had any issues.Originally Posted by Dana L
I have totally incorportaed the female /male look. I have very very few male clothing. I shave all over, pierced ears with small hoops, lip gloss, thin arched waxed eyebrows, arylic nails with a light pink varnish. I wear skinny or, boot cut very tight junior size jeans, or jeggings or leggings or yoga pants in male mode, of course, panties, bra, ankle braclet, wear girly perfume.
I do this a lot. Helps me to maintain a bit of sanity actually. I also live in a smaller town and have to be careful with it though.
Just recently we made a trip to town with me in my Gloria Vanderbilt bell bottomed skin tight jeans and a woman's tshirt in neutral color. hanes her way no show ankle socks complete with that pink stripe at the toes and a pair of nike slides. Hair down and brushed out. Slowing losing the baseball cap and pony tail look here
Nobody noticed at all.
I just have to be careful not to go too far and my wife is constantly helpful, checking me on the way out the door to make sure there's nothing to overt lol. We're making a trip to a larger city for the day in a couple months and I already have plans to show my toenails and color NOT CLEAR my fingernails. Maybe my girl slides instead of my mens.......She's cool with me being myself, it's just that where I live it's a lot like Kate.....small rural town, and while I don't care, I want to spare my wife the grief of being taunted or possible violence from the redne**s here.
Oh also I've started carrying my national guard cammouflage book bag as a purse
Barbie
Bags designed for men are all over the stores now, ostenibly for laptops, but with pads and tablets taking over many of the bags are now getting much smaller. Calvin Klein stores carry a large selection, as do most designers. DSW shoe stores always have them, and as mentioned before, Target has a line of inexpensive messenger type bags that are great. I saw one there yesterday that was obviously designed for a pad, but was indistinguishable from a purse. I have several that I use almost daily, from a wonderful leather bag fir my laptop to a tiny canvas one I use with a mini ipad. I love my bags...tee hee.
Thanks for the lead Samantha. I believe a weekend shopping trip is in my future.
Best wishes
MsVal
Anytime, Val. If it helps, the small ones I sae were at the Target in Troy by Crooks and Maple. Good luck!
Ooh. Good post! Generally speaking, in my day-to-day, my attire is a mish mosh of men's and women's clothes and accessories. It helps being a "punk" and working in the arts -- there's alot of gender blurring. Recently, I have some pads that round out my lower body and have gone out with them on, just to see how it would go... My head is shaved, but I had an oversized knit hat on and some light foundation to conceal my 5 o'clock shadow... it was an exhilarating experiment! some people interacted with me as though I was female, while others treated me as a somewhat femm guy... I definitely plan on doing this more often!
Last edited by Felicia Dee; 04-27-2014 at 03:39 PM.
I have not tried any of that but would love to some day in the near future
You can find matte finish topcoat, google or ebay. Few people notice nails, and it is quite okay for men to get manicures, if it is a little un-masculine.
Earrings are fine. Leave the left (or right) one in in male mode, add the other in female. If anyone says anything about both being pierced, I offer this advice: " So what? "
I love wearing my female ski suits when I go out to use the snowblower: At night, 1-2 hours in wearing them outside.
This was one of the main reasons I wanted to join the forum.. to find out more about this very thing.
I'm a big dude.. 6'2", 240#. Beard. I will *never* pass.. but I still love women's clothing. Its so much more interesting than men's clothing.
Under my pants & shirt at work I have been wearing panties, funky socks, & a camisole. I have pierced ears, do nail polish and use mascara. I wear skirts around the house because I like them. I don't usually wear those outside, though.
I have 'dolled up' more when my wife & I are going out to a concert or something, but I'm still treading the line between the gender identities. I can't see myself going all the way over.
I feel like a woman in a *nice* male body.
I think more people notice than what some here may think, but I do think that most do not care, or have anything to say about it. They are likely afraid of the answer, and as many have stated it is a neutral style, so they may think you are wearing women's clothes and are not sure, so they may also be afraid to ask out of fear of offending you. In the larger cities, nah, no one gives a crap, they have seen it all already.
Chickens should be allowed to cross the road without having their motives questioned
Hey Billie: In public I usually wear women's pants (3/4 length and tighter than men's or way looser) - at home I wear skirts and dresses. I wear make up that is obviously there if you want to look but is actually quite subtle. I wear mascara, lipstick, blush, a tinted moisturizer and I do my eyebrows. I do my nails with clear varnish. I wear my hair long or in a bun. I often wear women's blouses. I wear tights and stockings and, of course, panties or shape wear and a bra. I have piercings and tattoos. I'm not trying to pass as a woman. I'm not trying to pass as a man. I am wearing clothes that reflect the way I feel, which is non-binary or genderqueer or just plain queer. I am constantly amazed by how very little people care how I present myself. People take whatever cue they perceive and make an unconscious judgment about gender. Every now and then people think I am a woman because of the way I dress or because of the way I talk and act but mostly they use male pronouns when they describe me or talk to me. I suppose I would rather they did not identify me by gender at all but I understand how ingrained this is and hard it is for people to just look at each other as people or just the gender we present or don't at the moment. That's OK. The way I see myself has very little to do with the way other people see me. I've never been so happy as I am since I stopped trying to be what I thought other people wanted me to be. Wear whatever makes you happy! Most people could really not care less what you look like. And if they think you are funny, weird, ridiculous or a scandal, well that's their problem, isn't it?
I had my ears pierced but I wear "male" earrings in public. I wear women's panties most of the time and I wear women's jeans when jeans are called for in male mode. Not the skinny jeans or the ones with designs on them, just plain jeans but from the women's section of the store. They don't look different than men's jeans except they stretch and fit a little better.
There's a point where wearing obviously women's clothes or jewelry will have people wondering if you are gay or something else. That may bother you, it may not. It may hurt you in your career or it may not. Each of us has different circumstances.
I pretty much dress like that all the time now. Wife approves, which is a plus. I also get complements on my attire from men and women alike. I even dress like that at church, and we go to a pretty conservative church. Daviolin
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A CD AND HIS WARDROBE, ITS A BEAUTIFUL THING.
Since writing this thread, I have been making subtle changes each day and I pretty much wear women's attire that is gender neutral all the time. I have also gotten rid of all my men's clothes except a few items. Most people haven't noticed and if they have have not said anything. Those that do, don't have a problem and are supportive. I actually got both ears pierced and wear earrings in both all the time even at work and have not gotten any problems. The only person who has a problem is my soon to be ex wife.
Samantha: for my current job I have a laptop bag for my work computer. But I'm going to now check out the the places you mentioned to find what other bags I can use that look better. Thanks for the suggestion.
I underdress with bra & panties all the time, keep my legs shaved. I'm working half-time & in drab there. Other days I usually try for completely feminine clothing. I wear women's flip-flops to the shower in the men's locker room at the gym, wrap a towel like a skirt for shaving my chin. Pull on black or white panties under the towel, then women's jeans or pull-on pants. I put a sports bra inside a woman's polo shirt--sometimes with 3/4 length sleeves--& pull them on together in the locker room. Maybe nylon or unisex socks,& women's trainers. In cold weather sometimes a grey cashmere hoodie that looks like a sweatshirt, or a women's zip-up windbreaker. If I'm wearing black shoes, I keep all my gear--wallet, keys, pills, &c--in a grey canvas cross-body bag just big enough for my iPad mini. With brown shoes, I carry a larger 2-tone brown canvas American Eagle cross-body bag that's just big enough for a 15" laptop. From the locker room I go to the cafeteria for lunch & wi-fi. Always fish my credit card out of the inner zip pocket of the purse, & zip it back when I'm done. Have done this about twice a week for a couple of years, no problem.
Away from the gym, I prefer conventional bras, and have several that are unobtrusive under loose men's sport shirts or polos.
Often carry one of the purses to church, especially when using the iPad for audiovisual support in our morning discussion group. I may get a hug at church, so don't wear conventional bras unless I also wear a blazer. Wouldn't want to shock a nice old lady.
Always sporting a big handlebar mustache, don't wear make-up at all, except sometimes nail polish with skirts or dresses.
I have no qualms about wearing women's pants anywhere but work, but I'm a little squeamish about girl-side buttons on shirts when I go to the zoo or museum, & might meet someone I know. Also I don't want to antagonize my wife, who knows, doesn't accept, prefers to remain unaware. I do wear my least-obvious women's tops when she's around sometimes.
But I find women's pants unsatisfying. Skirts & dresses are much more fun!
Lainie
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever!
Funny thing but I was at work yesterday and realized that everything I was wearing was female. Nothing too obvious, but black venezia flare leg slacks, cotton button up blouse and a white cable sweater and low heel wedge ankle boots. I've worn a stud earrings (usually one in each ear) for a long time and never really been questioned.
There are a lot of things you can get away with just as long as it isn't way over the top. Makeup is tricky, most people do notice but most will say nothing. I wear a little bronzer some times and I've had some female customers ask where I got my "tan", don't think you're fooling many women, they can tell. I'll laugh it off as windburn or it's just my mediterranian affinty to the sun.
Last edited by Nikki A.; 02-28-2014 at 06:21 PM. Reason: Added a little more
Currently I only wear clear nail polish. Although my gf did pickup use polish for me to wear out in guy mode. Te only person who has noticed was my old partner at work. I told her I lost a bet. I've been trying to keep my nails nice and trimmed and recently got clear mascara and some powder makeup to wear out to nice places even in guy mode. As far as the earrings. I've seen a lot of guys recently with both ears pierced. I doubt anyone will say anything.
Penny loafers or wing tips (perhaps two tone) might be nice femme styles that could pass. Ballet slippers also.
Best Wishes for Personal Peace & Happiness
-
Helen Grandeis
the Adrogynous look is something I have ben doing for several years. Lady's jeans, with a top, depending on the weather, maby a sweater. Female shoes, loaffers, panty hose. Jewelry consist of anklet, bracelet on one wrist, female watch on other, neckless, ear rings, with a light make-up. Never have had a rude remark or encounter, however I notice that the younger girls do look and stare, but who cares. There are more things in this world to concern ourselves with than what kind or type of cloths a person is wearing.......
I don't mix and match my gender expressions. When I am girl I am girl when I am boy I am boy. I guess the closest I get is when I am decide to be Isha at home but don't bother with make-up (too time intensive). However when I am "boy me" it is boy clothes.
Hugs
Isha
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