Can someone explain to me how a person can decide to get rid of all his male underwear, and still claim he won't ever want to transition? He marks the anniversaries of purging all his guy underpants (1 month! 6 months! 1 year of wearing only panties!) -- how could that not reflect a deep-seated desire to get rid of all his male clothes and live full-time as a woman, even if he's not ready to admit that to me?
Because this kind of obsessive and compulsive behaviour that some cross-dressing individuals seem to have isn't necessarily related to a mismatch of one's (birth-assigned) sex and the internal sense of gender identity?
Hello JessM.
Though I have not purged all my male underwear, I can say that I tend to have more boy shorts and other panties than boxer briefs. I am fully comfortable with being a male who likes to wear woman's clothes at times. Speaking for myself I just like the way some of the panties and hosery feels.
Dana M
I never purge anything...
Mine all wore out and got used as oil rags in the garage.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
purging male underwear, or clothes and not wanting to be a woman... speaking for myself, as i did purge all my mens underwear a year ago, ive come to the decision its just clothes. how can what i wear determine what gender i am? Just because i choose to wear panties 24.7, that doesnt make me a woman. In fact, its made me realize i am my own man...
melissa
I think Zylia's got it with her usual Sidewinder-like accuracy and subtlety!Originally Posted by Zylia
I'd suggest the purging and time logging is more of a totem than anything else - something that can be focused upon as an affirmation that the CDing is complete - but that doesn't mean it goes any further.
I'll sail right into a southerly gale here by saying that I like my boy boxers...)
Katey x
"Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear" Stefani Germanotta
Ditto Melissa
Barbie
I can't explain it because that is what happen to me, the only thing you can do is keep talking to your SO he may not understand it now either but it does not mean he is going to transitions, not everyone transitions. Together you have to look at this as a journey and decide if you are going to take it together, either of you know what the outcome is going to be.
It's a very long distance from secretly only wearing women's underwear to fully transitioning. A *lot* of CDs only wear women's underwear. Hey, if you aren't going to wear them, why keep your male underwear around? It frees up drawer space for panties, if nothing else.
The thing is, and this is a point I make a lot, the positive signs you see like this, the gender variant behavior, are only the tip of the ice berg. It's the stuff below the surface that you generally can't see that leads us to transition. I didn't transition because I had this fantasy that dressing as a woman is super fun, so being one - WOW!!!! No, I transitioned because if I had to look in the mirror one more day and see that ****ing man look back at me, I was going to blow my goddamned head off.
Have you talked to your spouse about why he wants to do this? Unless the reason is something along the lines of "wearing only panties provides me a tiny bit of comfort in my bleak existence as a man", you probably don't have too much to worry about yet.
I can understand your concern over what is an escalation of your spouse's cross gender behavior. But the reality is that someone can get pretty darn girly, and never really fully transition because they just aren't driven by the horrible negativity that is severe GD.
Do you see any new negativity in your SO?
do they still make "tightie white-ies"?
I haven't worn "male" underwear in going on 36 years. Yes during that time I transitioned but came back to the dark side as well. Just kept wearing panties. Besides being more comfortable, why would you NOT wear panties?
While I haven't purged the male underwear and have been wearing panties for about 10 years now there are times when I revert, such as hospital stays, and certain medical procedures where explanations would be needed. I'm not looking to live full time, but I do prefer to wear my feminine clothing as much as possible. It's self-expression for me, not an inner desire to transition.
I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !
Well I threw out most of my Male undies years ago when I retired.
I keep only 1 or 2 in the drawer for toes Doctor visits when needed.
It is Panties for me all the time, And love it.
Rader
I don't get it either Hon. Personally, even though I like to dress, I like my tighty whities. Ain't gettin' rid of them, no way, no how. I think maybe it has something to do with trying to convince himself of something. Myself? I'm a guy and that ain't changing anytime soon.
Second star to the right and straight on till morning
Thanks, everyone, for the helpful replies. If it were just about being practical, I'd understand it better, but who celebrates anniversaries of clearing out drawer space. Zylia's comment about obsessive behavior rang true to me... that helps quite a bit.
I stopped wearing male underwear last summer, I was getting a rash around my waist and on my left hip, a result of the elastic, I guess I'm allergic to it. Nylon bikini panties work just fine and the rash is gone! I still have the tighty whities but haven't worn them in at least six or seven months, I suppose when I go for my annual physical I'll put on a pair.
Hugs Bria
Male underwear, I haven't worn any in over 30 years. I don't want to transition.
purged my last mens under wear about one year ago when I got the courage to wear panties to my female doctor. She said i am not the first guy to wear panties no problems.
.
I was down to a single pair of tidy whities when I needed to wear all male for a couple weeks. Now I have a bunch of them that have only been worn once. I wear one pair to the doctors, but otherwise it's all panties for me. I'm not interested in transitioning but have worn panties for over 50 years.
Jess, you're off the track on this one. Underwear is hidden by our outside clothing. The fact that we wear female underwear is just an internal thing. For me, a visual admission that I am a cross dresser and NOT in hiding anymore. I purged all my tightie whities two years ago. I'm a dude, through and through.
Now, if he is dressing 24/7, then you might be on to something!
This thread got me thinking,,, I do still have MALE undies in my drawer and I just went to look at them. I guess it's been quite a while since I have wore them, The elactic on all of them has gave-out!!! I guess I should just throw them away. I do have a big assortment of (panties) but I just call them undies. I just wear my undies everyday just like any other (person). Just went to a Dr. appt. yesterday and picked out a very plain pair of black undies, Dr. and nurses didn't even miss a beat. I Don't have any plans to transion at all. I just like my cumfy UNDIES!!!
Is it at all sexual in a thrilling sort of way, or was this the root that has now morphed into wearing them for comfort?
Don't most men associate sexiness (or sensuality) with women's panties?
Reine
Have been doing a lot of research online recently for styles that fit better and ran accross an article that mentioned a new fashion trend that started in Japan but is spreading world wide........Sexy lingerie designed for men. specifically hetero men.
There was a link to this site and I put it in my favorites
http://www.hommemystere.com/
Read some of the customer testimonials from women that buy these items for their men.
Finally some acceptance
Maybe should post this in fashion and shopping section but thought it was germaine to the conversation.
For some CDs it might not have anything to do with their internal gender. For others it does. But at times like these it helps to remember that gender is not a binary. If you were to grab one of his old T-shirts and use it as a night shirt, would that mean that you wanted to transition to male "even if you don't want to admit it to yourself" ?
Celebrating getting rid of men's underwear could be as simple as celebrating freedom. If someone had feared "getting caught", perhaps just for regular embarrassment shame, perhaps because they grew up in an environment where being found to have worn panties would have been a major crisis or cause for a beating, then finally getting to a point in one's life where one could wear what one liked would be a cause for celebration. Hypothetically, someone might not even care much about wearing panties but might choose to continue wearing them as a symbol of freedom. If that were the case, then any pressure to wear something else would likely result in a push-back: "Ain't nobody gonna tell me what I can or cannot wear!".
I no longer own any male underwear and have no intentions of ever transitioning. I have no idea when I got rid of them; I do not mark it as some sort of major event in my history. I just looked at it sitting in my drawer and wondered why I am keeping it if I never intend to wear it again.
I find it interesting that so many people are uncomfortable at those of us who are happy being somewhere between the two binary genders. I am a blend of genders, some male qualities, some female; if I change my bits I will just have different outer bits, but inside I will still feel the same, sometimes male-ish and sometimes female-ish. But 100% me.
Mine wore out around 20 yrs ago and were taking up space in my pantie drawer. Out they went and never replaced them.
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