Hi all, this is an add on from my earlier post. I'm looking to ask my mum (who already knows I crossdress) if it would be ok for me to dress around her.
I have a good idea what to say to her, but I'm even more nervous then when i told her Im a crossdresser.
Any ideas on how to get the convo flowing? I'm really struggling.
Thanks
Danielle x
hmmm... I would 1st attempt to open up the conversations about CDing. You say she knows you do. Maybe just start talking about the clothes you like to wear, ask questions about where to find certain items, how to save money etc etc.... It may take awhile, and TBH, you are lucky that your mom knows and is ok enough to have you live there and give you time to do so. Don't push too hard, just gently open up the conversations a little here and there. I would imagine that it may be as difficult in some ways for a mother as it would be for an S/O.
Chickens should be allowed to cross the road without having their motives questioned
This is something I wish I would have been able to do, but never did. I'd keep it real simple, just say something like, "Mum, you know I like to dress up. I was wondering if you'd like to see what I look like, it's absolutely fine if you'd rather not." See how it goes from there. Best of luck.
Christen x
“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing
and rightdoing there is a field.
I'll meet you there.” - Rumi.
How about "Mum, would it be ok if I crossdressed when you're around?" - asked in a tentative way... Seems like the simple approach is the best one for you, unless there's circumstances we're not aware of which might affect this.
Do it when she's not pre-occupied, maybe over a cuppa at the kitchen table during a quiet moment. If you can't bring yourself to ask the exact question it might help to ask her if you can ask her a question. That kind of leads you into asking the real question and allows you to gauge her mood and likely reaction.
Good luck! I hope it works out well. Be gentle with her!
Best Wishes for Personal Peace & Happiness
-
Helen Grandeis
Megan got it right. Simple an direct. "mum, what you think if..." "Mum, how would you feel if...." It'll be ok
Dani, just do it. She loves and accepts you unconditionally... Peace. Mel
It sounds like you are nearly ready to do it so try "Mum, do you mind if I wear a skirt this evening?"
I asked my dad if I could wear my leggings at his house. He said " whatever makes you comfortable"
So I did.
See all my photos, read many stories of my outings and my early days at
http://rachelsauckland.blogspot.co.nz
You can always hold something up and ask an opinion of her.
"Do you think this would suit me?"
If she says yes, go from there.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
Hello Danicd1,
I am just wondering if words are actually necessary at this stage as I am not a great one of asking things myself so I would be inclined to start by wearing something quite simple and the judge on the reaction and atmosphere that your mother gives off , I just find that sensing something tells me a lot more than words do but in the end it is how you best deal with things within your family that matters so if you think you should ask first then by all means do that .
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Joanne
Rather than starting with a request for her permission ("May I?"), it may be helpful to preface the talk with a statement that you would like her approval to dress around the house, thereby putting your desires on the table before getting to her approval. Absent that, your desires would likely only be stated in a defense.
Best wishes
MsVal
Direct but delicate........"Mum I'd like to thank you for your discretion, in washing and stowing my girl things. Would it be allright if we had a talk? And if so is there anything you'd like to know?"
Let her lead it from there, Mothers are fantastic creatures of love and understanding. She'll let you know what her comfort level is if you ask her. But definately acknowlege that you know that she knows that you know...etc. and that you're appreciative!
Barbie
Danielle - you've made one big leap of faith in letting your mum know - and the next one is probably just as big (or bigger, if you were feeling as I'd feel..!).
Rather than straight in with 'choice of dress' or 'opinion of leggings' - it might be a start to ask her if she's had any further thoughts or has any further questions for you, about why you do it, or how you feel about it. And also to ask how she feels about it.. She may have unanswered questions and I'd think it was better to get them aired before approaching the actual dressing question.
Once you're through that (and you might be already..) then I think there are plenty good suggestions here
Good luck - deep breaths - hold your head up and be confident!
Katey x
"Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear" Stefani Germanotta
consider yourself lucky already....i live with mom (for now) and while I am bumming a free roof over my head I figured it's best not to mention it . You are in a good place .
Hi girls, thanks so much for all of your responses, I'm currently waiting for my dad to not be hanging around for a bit. (He doesn't know, or I think not lol)
I will keep all you lovely people posted, fingers crossed :S
Danielle x
Good luck! ^_^ I hope everything goes well.
Good luck luv.
Just ask. She seems quite supportive. There's no reason to beat around the bush.
Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.
Eleanor Roosevelt
Posting Permissions
