About acceptance

[Dani0948]

After reading a few recent posts about acceptance, I wondered if there might be some comparisons?
Think about the last time you saw a young man with his pants hanging down below his backside. How did it make you feel. Disgusted,, shocked, thrilled, bored, happy?
I often wonder "Who thinks that look is attractive?"
I wonder if we are perceived the same way by the general public?
I'm all for live and let live, but I still think some things just look wierd.

[docrobbysherry]

I don't wear my pants that way because I think it looks ridiculous! If I did wear them that way? I would be embarrassed and ashamed of how I looked.

Which is EXACTLY how I feel about how I look when I go out in public dressed!

I've gotten used to the ridicule and unacceptance of the muggles. But, I can't seem to get past my own!

[Persephone]

Dani,

Are you perceived that way? Or do you just feel that you are? We are sometimes our own worst judge of our own acceptance.

Yes, double-takes, distain, they can happen. But they also offer an opportunity to figure out why they are happening and to make changes so that they happen less and less often.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Marcelle]

Hi Dani,

Funny you should mention that as I saw a young fellow at the bus stop the other day and he was wearing a pair of skinny jeans with the crotch riding about knee level and baggy boxers showing to the world. I thought it was a bit comical to be honest but to each their own. I am sure I get quite a few similar thoughts when out dressed.

Hugs

Isha

[Barbie Anne]

Still trying to figure out how they do that? Safety pins?

As to the subject of the post, you bring a good point. Our tastes colour our perception of the world, and to each his own.

When I was a kid rainbow suspenders and bellbottomed hiphugger jeans were worn by straight guys. I still wear them but I'm never getting an afro perm in my blonde hair again

My point is Our parents griped about what we wore and their's them so forth back to antiquity.

[AllieSF]

Yes, I think that sometimes we are perceived that way. To me it is like, "I don't like that look, but I respect their right to present that way." That is how I approach that. Since I have been dressing my level of tolerance and acceptance has significantly improved. I am also more protective of the rights of individuals to present and act as they like, even if I do not personally like it, and I defend those rights when necessary, even on this site where you would think that we would be much more tolerant and accepting. Go figure!

[Allisa]

First PULL UP YOUR PANTS !!.Okay got that off my mind.

Lisa

[Jilmac]

I wouldn't wear my pants that low because I don't want to flash my panties to the world.

[Helen Grandeis]

It is always better to be classy than trashy. As a CD it is usually our goal to blend or pass at least at a distance. You don't want people to linger their attention.

[busker]

Ten years before its time, a fashion is indecent; ten years after, it is hideous; but a century after, it is romantic.
JAMES LAVER, attributed, Business Wit & Wisdom
well,who knows about the "romantic" part. Indecent and hideous work fine for me as a description.

[Kristina_nolagirl]

I find it amazing that crossdressers can form a negative opinion of the way anyone else dresses. It was once said "Exactly what you put out is exactly what you can expect to get in return." Show love and acceptance for everyone and only then can you legitimately expect it back.

[Tina_gm]

Basically true Kristina, who are we to judge when we are "different" than most. On a personal level, I hate the low pants look, but then again, I can despise certain looks GG;s have, CD's have.... all personal preference for them and for me. If they are happy with how they look then ultimately that is all that matters.

[Angie G]

Attractive not in the least. As for what others think I don't know.
Angie

[Tracii G]

I'm over the droopy jeans thing I learned not to judge a person by the clothes.
I assume the fad will go away soon enough.

[FemPossible]

I've had several conversations about people sagging pants their pants in various Facebook groups. My stance is that it's their right to wear their clothes however they want to. It's a free country. I always compare them to people who have their actual naked butt showing. No one seems to bat an eyelash at those people but don't you dare show your boxer shorts. What sense does that make?

[Beverley Sims]

If something does not meet your dress standard ignore it and them.
There are more things to worry about, like if your own wig is on straight and you look like a lady.

[sometimes_miss]

After reading a few recent posts about acceptance, I wondered if there might be some comparisons?
Think about the last time you saw a young man with his pants hanging down below his backside.

Young males emulate those that they see as successful in achieving the goals they want. If an older male walks around with his pants down, and has girlfriends, has respect of his peers, then that's all it takes. The younger male will emulate that male in hopes of those goals. Then it perpetuates.

[Kate Simmons]

This only works if we are worried about what others may think. Obviously, many aren't.

[MsVal]

That is not a double standard. There is a very real difference between those that wish to make things better and those that want to make things worse.

Crossdressers invest considerable time, effort, and money, striving to meet some standard of beauty that will be appropriate for a venue. They want to enhance, not diminish the collective experience through their female presentation. Success, for a CD is being accepted as a part of the normal community.

The baggy pants crowd does none of those. They wish to stand out from the norm, they actively challenge authority, they seek to make every place a part of the depressed inner city. Acceptance is not what they seek.

Concerned parents are moving their families here, a little north of Detroit, in an effort to escape the social and economic problems of their old neighborhoods. They want their children to live in an environment that encourages self improvement rather than self abasement. The problem comes when a few of the kids don't get the message and want to bring their customs and culture with them.

Best wishes
MsVal

[NicoleScott]

One guy to another:
"You shouldn't wear your pants so low that your butt crack shows. You don't see me wearing my skirt like that."

[5150 Girl]

I agree with MsVal... I think there is a big difference between showing you underthings, and bending the gender norms... It's called UNDERwear for a reason.

[Caden Lane]

The inherent difference between the two is that while we try to pass, gain acceptance, to look classy, and we want to fit in. The "style" you refer to is an effort to thumb ones nose at society, show off and not fit in. Odd how one is embraced by youth for the most part and we are still shunned.

[UNDERDRESSER]

I find it amazing that crossdressers can form a negative opinion of the way anyone else dresses. It was once said "Exactly what you put out is exactly what you can expect to get in return." Show love and acceptance for everyone and only then can you legitimately expect it back.

Nicely said.

I try to practice this. I have got to the stage where I can live and let live, but internally I still think "That's not right!"

I just want to wear a skirt and stockings or other legwear. I am working on my own look that lets me a be a man, but presenting in a way that reflects what I want to be. For myself, there are looks that work, but I can't wear in public because it's SO DIFFERENT. If one can step back and view it unemotionally, you can say, "Wow, that really shows off his nice butt and legs!" Without the "OMG! Why the hell is he wearing that?!"

[Jaymees22]

If we want to be accepted, than dressing appropriately for the situation or place we are is the best bet. If we want to be noticed then dress to be noticed.

There are a lot of different theories on the saggy pants look and that it probably started in prisons, check out this http://www.snopes.com/risque/homosex/sagging.asp . I guess some people like it, as some people like cross dressing. Jaymee

[Kristina_nolagirl]

Jeeeeez....I'm amazed. I wear my pants low as a guy because it's a fashion thing. I don't want to look like a nerd. But it's ok for me because I'm a decent looking in shape white guy. All of you who are against low pants are clearly defining your disgust for low pants as in low pants worn by young black males in the inner cities of America. Please tell me when the last time you complained about an extra low top on a woman, or the new shorts that girls as young as 12-13 are wearing these days that clearly expose their butt cheeks. You don't!!!!!! And they are exposing actual skin....not the cloth of underwear. To be coming from this group who supposedly wants people to accept them for who they are is mind blowing to me!!!!

And don't even try to hide behind the "we do it in a classy elegant way" bs. Everyone of us knows that for every classy, elegant Trans person, there is 2 or 3 more gross ass hairy men in their wives panties posting pictures online which results in us all being classified as "perverts". That's unfair and hurtful but comes as a result of grouping all of us as "the same" which is exactly what you guys are doing for low pants wearers.

As far as I'm concerned, if you want to justify judging of other people by any means than you deserve every bit of negativity thrown your way. I'm not a religious person but I do subscribe to the 1 thing that every main religion in the world has in common which is to "treat others as you would like to be treated"