Feeling a bit discouraged and disheartened

[Camille15]

I have time for a day off work, so I'm planning to book a hotel room again for some private Camille time later this month. I thought I might even venture out a bit, perhaps past the lobby this time. Just dressing in my room seems less thrilling since last time when I finally got out a bit and actually felt like people thought I was a "just another girl" walking around.

Being Spring, I'm trying to put together an appropriate but passable outfit. The process, though, has left me discouraged. My wife doesn't wan't me to shave my chest, and I need to cover most of my arms and legs, which has been making it hard for me to find an outfit. I tried ordering this sweater, which I thought I could wear over a boatneck shirt. But trying it on just led to the shirt sagging and showing my chest (hair), and also the tightness of the sweater really revealed how broad my shoulders are. I also realized that wearing jeans just isn't a "go" for me. I need something more feminine looking (dress, skirt) to feel feminine and thus build my confidence. But my usual sweater dress & boots will be a no-no in April.

All this got me to thinking of what's the point in me going out at all. I don't want to be "that guy in drag", and I wonder who I'm really fooling besides myself. I'm putting so much effort and money into this, and the past day or so I'm wondering if it's all worth it. I don't plan to purge, but I do wonder if I should just stick to my hotel room and give up on the idea that I could go out and actually pass in public.

Anyone else ever feel this way?

Thanks,
Camille

[SheriM]

Sometimes the effort is not worth the reward and I don't put makeup on when at home and I don't usually dress just for an hour's worth of shopping. Those road trips are very nice though - when I can be a woman for 2 or 3 days.

SheriM

[Tina B.]

Sounds a little like cold feet to me, I know because I suffer from it myself. For me, I'm old and tired, and am glad to sit at home in a dress, but if it's really important, and you've already been out, enjoyed it, and the Villagers didn't come out with pitchforks and torches, what makes you think you can't pull it off again? As far as that chest hair, try a scarf. http://lifehacker.com/25-different-w...ide-1497868372 Try this for 25 ways to use a scarf, some of them will hide your problem. Staying in and playing with a camera can be fun, but if your yearning to go out, there is no substitute.

[Jenniferathome]

Camille, that thought has passed through my transom on occasion. I think if you are trying to "fool" others as your goal, you will be disappointed. If instead, you choose to express yourself in a way that makes you feel good, then you can achieve this goal.

Forget "passing" and focus on "blending." Blending in is possible even if your are rough around the edges. I like the sweater color and overall style but not the thumb hole part. If it's too tight, return it and order up a size or two. If you've ever seen me post a picture, it's wearing a sweater or jacket. I have broad shoulders and largish biceps, so I hide them. I wear a size 12 dress typically, but I buy 14 to 16 tops and sweaters and jackets. There are many high neck looks that women wear so hiding hair quite doable. Women wear maxi skirts and dresses in spring. They wear cropped jackets and sweaters. Do your people watching and find a look that works for you.

[Sallee]

great video on scarf wearing What a great accessory I need more of them Thanks

[DonnaT]

Blouses with bows and long sleeves will work.

Ladies to the neck T-shirt dyed to match your flesh tone worn under a blouse. It can be sleeveless and the blouse can be lacy.

[Beverley Sims]

Whilst we are still in search of ourselves Camille, a lot of others have similar thinking.
You will come out when the right time comes along.

[Chickhe]

Get yourself a hair trimmer with a blending attachement. Trim all of your body hair down to 1/4 long. That way, you can avoid looking like a bear...your wife will likely appreciate it too. It works well for looking good in male mode and works well enough for CDing too. Or go for crazy and carve your favorite sports team logo on your chest hair and she will demand you trim it all off afterwards.