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Thread: About to make first call to therapist

  1. #1
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    About to make first call to therapist

    After much discussion with my very supportive wife, I am giving serious thought to seeing a therapist. I am starting to realize that I may be more than a CD as I am wanting to be dressed and live as a woman.

    The issue is how do I make that first call? What do I say? Seems all so overwhelming!!

  2. #2
    Did you say shopping? Caden Lane's Avatar
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    Just ask i they have experience in gender related issues. You don't have to say much else with your initial phone call. Save that for the privacy of the initial interview.
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  3. #3
    Martini Girl Katey888's Avatar
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    Kristina - it may seem particularly brutal, but you have to be completely open with them about what you want to talk about. Of course, try to find a therapist who either specialises or at least has some experience of gender issues, but if you want the most from any counselling, you have to be open and honest with them.

    I would park your own theories as to what you might or might not be, until you've had a chance to discuss what you're feeling with a professional..

    Good luck!

    Katey x
    "Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
    Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear"
    Stefani Germanotta

  4. #4
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    I went on line and checked for a therapist in a 50 mile range and came up with pages of profiles on therapists, their qualifications, photos, what they specialize in, ect. I found it hard to pick from so many. Found a good one and went with SO and then by myself for a while. My initial call was for marriage counceling... They were never less than professional.
    Good luck,
    Love KristyE

    PS Think I still need a few more visits. hehe

  5. #5
    Isn't Life Grand? AllieSF's Avatar
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    Welcome to the Forum Kristina. I would first do a Google search for local LGBT, transgender experienced therapists. Maybe you first do a search for local LGBT support groups and then see if they have any recommendations. Many times colleges and university will have their own therapists to assist their own students. They probably even have LGBT organizations too. So, they could be another source of information and recommendations.

    If you live in a small town with no college nor university, then you may have to travel to a hopefully close by larger city. It will definitely be worth finding one with experience in this area. If that is out of the question, then just call and ask if they have experience, and how much, working with transgender individuals, and if they do not, could they recommend someone or help steer you in the right direction to get the help you need. I would just explain that you are transgender without any details.

    If you can't find one with the experience, then try to find one willing to help you and to learn more on their own time to improve their experience and knowledge. Yes, there are some things that can really benefit with some previous experience. However, a lot of the issues deal with self acceptance, family and friends, frustration, guilt and other things that are very commonly treated by most all therapists. I have read enough about this on our site here to know that some of our members have had wonderful success working with someone without the previous experience. So, all is not necessarily lost if that is where you end up. I wish you the best and applaud your early decision to seek professional help. It does work and can help you.

  6. #6
    Member Taylor Ray's Avatar
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    As a therapist myself I can only say that it can be likened to a crap shoot: many people in the field aren't very good. I would do some research and find someone who is highly recommended.

  7. #7
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    Definitely ask if they routinely work with clients with gender identity/expression issues. I don't want you to do what I did. I unknowingly taught, at my expense about 3 to 5 therapists before finding a practice that had several therapists trained in gender issues.
    If you by chance live in central NJ or NYC I have a great practice to suggest by private message. As much as that first visit will be a starting point for your therapist you need to ask some direct questions about their packground and experience. How often/many gender clients do they see and how regularly. ANother way to feel them out is ask about coming to therapy dressed. They should be fine with it if you want to. Good luck and let the therapy lead you to whereever it should, keep an open mind.

  8. #8
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    As others have said find one skilled in gender related issues.

    Some have definite attitude problems and should not be practicing.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  9. #9
    Junior Member DCUnitedfan1988's Avatar
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    As everyone has said definitely find a therapist with experience in gender related issues. It is great that your wife is supportive, I wish you the best of luck!

  10. #10
    Senior Member Barbra P's Avatar
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    There is nothing in your post or profile that gives a clue as to where you live. If you live in or near a large metropolitan area I’d suggest that you try and find a LGBT organization or a transgender support group as these generally have a list of Therapists in the area that treat transgender issues. The group I belong to in San Diego lists Therapists on their website.

    I mentioned to my Doctor that I had a transgender issue and she put me contact with a Counselor. After a very pleasant two-hour session with the Counselor she asked my Doctor to submit a referral for a Licensed Therapist.
    Babs

  11. #11
    Member Jennifer S's Avatar
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    I got lucky and had a good match with the first therapist I contacted. From what I hear, shopping around is often necessary until you find someone you are comfortable with. That said, I did quite a bit of research before making the call. All that really involved was spending time on Google and reading all of the info I could find on the available therapists in my area. If they didn't state somewhere that they worked in the area of gender issues they were out of consideration.
    I hope you update us and let us know how everything is going. We are here to support you.

    Jenn
    My blog www.transcriptsblog.wordpress.com
    Twitter: @transgirl_Jenn

  12. #12
    Valley Girl Michelle789's Avatar
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    Kristina, welcome to the forum!!!

    I would find a therapist who specializes in gender issues. They will be of far better help than a regular therapist who may or may not know anything about gender.

    I know it's hard making the first call. I was really scared at first, but eventually I just decided to do it, and I'm going to my second therapist appointment tomorrow. What part of the country (or world) do you live in? Maybe someone who lives in your area can recommend one. If not, then you can do a Google search to find one.

    I wish you the best of luck.
    I've finally mastered the art of making salads. My favorite is a delicious Mediterranean salad.

  13. #13
    Member carolynn2fem's Avatar
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    I like this site here. http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/ you can narrow it by zipcode issues and your insurance. my expirance with it is my first therapist was listed as GLBT but I was her first T.

  14. #14
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    There are some gender therapists who will work with you over Skype as well.

  15. #15
    Junior Member Shy_Confusion's Avatar
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    I did a Google search for Gender Therapist, and one of the sites told me if they had LGBT, TS, and/or gender spectrum clients or not, a picture and a short bio on their treatment methods. It might have been through the local LGBT site? It helped me chose correctly who I wanted to see.

    I went to my first one today, and I feel WAY better after talking to a professional rather than just to my mom and my friends.

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by KristinaP View Post

    The issue is how do I make that first call? What do I say? Seems all so overwhelming!!
    It was about the hardest call I ever made. Now I look back and wonder why it was so hard? When the receptionist answered I told her it was about transgender issue and I heard one the the therapists there had experience with that. She was very friendly and Yes, this is the person you want to talk to about it and made my appointment with her. It was all very easy and not a big deal (though I was shaking when I made the call)

  17. #17
    Part time CD girl Lexi Moralas's Avatar
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    I found talking with a therapist to be amazing ! Just to say all those thing out loud that had been in my head all those years was very liberating

  18. #18
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    Thank you all for your kind responses. I have a listing for 2 in my area through my insurance and transgender were listed as specialties. If anyone is in the Flathead county area in Montana, and could recommend some that would be great as well.

  19. #19
    Member cdsara's Avatar
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    I can recommend a few. I have gone to a couple here and had good and bad experiences, but I have a good one now that I think you would like.

  20. #20
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    That would be wonderful if you could send some reccomends via PM. Thank you oh so very much.

  21. #21
    Member cdsara's Avatar
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    I tried but I can't send you a pm until you have at least 10 posts.

  22. #22
    Member cdsara's Avatar
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    I was able to send you an email.

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