Conflicted Thoughts About Dressing

[Jorja]

There is nothing wrong with taking a brake from CDing. Go be your guy self once in a while. Get some dirt under your fingernails and drink a few brews with the boys. It might make your CDing much more enjoyable and creative.

[sometimes_miss]

....forcing it because you feel "you have to" is always the wrong reasons to dress.

And yet, this may be the confusing part for women, because they 'have to' dress up (hair, make up, etc.,) every day of their lives. So for us to just decide one day that it's too much trouble, it's gonna seem way unfair to them.

and

I think that perhaps dressing is a way of helping to reach a mental place that you can't get to otherwise. Mode of dress affects head space.

I think that's the most obvious thing. We can't get into either 1. our comfort zone, or 2. our excitement zone, unless we're dressed up the way we need to be. Not that those are the only two options, but just those as an example.

[Caden Lane]

The point is my or your happiness. It's reflected in what we do, it's why we do it. Among a myriad of other reasons. We all question it, we've all purged and hoped to leave it behind forever. The best any of us can hope to find is a way to balance it, and tap into it for our happiness.

[sonialexis]

I do have my moments of conflict and it is bothersome but i try not let it get to me too much. there are times when I just dress without thinking and when i'm done and removing my make up, i have at times questioned the 'act'. I also know how much i love it and it probably will not stop, like someone said here there's a time for both, so i feed my male side too and indulge my female side equally. I wish I could offer a concrete solution but hon I can only tell you, i'm paddling the same boat you'e on.

[mykell]

it is a ying and tang thing, pink and blue, male and female, balance, logo atop page,
had friends that would bust my chops "boy your miserable today" id respond "somebody has to balance out all the clowns out there",
some days are better than others no mater what you do,
most impulse buying is done by folks who are feeling depressed, the purchase picks them up,
hope you found something extra special.....

[Chari]

IMO it is always best to be comfortable and confident in who I am, no matter how I am presenting. Enjoy life - it is the only one you have!

[MsVal]

First there is the issue of defining the sweet spot versus "not far enough" or "too far". We tend to dither around the spot, going from too little to too much and back again. Race car drivers' entire career is spent on riding that sweet spot in the turns, and only one will do it well enough to win each race.

Then there is the issue of the sweet spot constantly moving. It may be because of our attitude at the moment, scarcity of time, or the ever shifting Pink Fog. The sweet spot moves and so do the definitions of too little and too much.

Together they combine to give us days where we go too far and feel silly or not far enough and feel unfulfilled. I guess it just comes with the package.

Best wishes
MsVal

[Randee]

Trying to keep it simple. I just slip into something at home when I desire the look and feel on me. As the numerous gf's I shared my dressing interests with said,'if it feels good, then wear them. After all, it's just clothes.'

[Tina_gm]

Oh yes, I have gotten those types of feelings quite a bit. Mostly of course when I am not feeling as strong of a connection to the feminine side, but even sometimes when I do have a stronger connection, I sometimes wonder if there is any real point to it, and that maybe I should try to focus more on the masculine side. I have given up trying to rid myself of my feminine side, I know it will never go away.

[Rebecca W.]

Hi Adriana,

I have to go with the "balance" of cross dressing and just being a guy. There are times when dressing as feminine as possible will pull me out of a deep emotional rut. There are days when I just feel more comfortable as a woman, pampered is the word. A nice hot bath, a freshly shaven body and the comfort of something soft and silky. I do enjoy just being a guy and staying in that mode for extended periods of time.

Let it simmer for a while and the cross dressing will pull you back in when your feminine side becomes the dominate force again. We just have a more complex emotional balance than the average person. They only have to deal with being in one gender mode for life. Just think how boring that could become!

If only there was a much greater acceptance in this world for peoples personal choices or preferences.

Take care my friend,

[brassieres]

I have to go with the "balance" of cross dressing and just being a guy. There are times when dressing as feminine as possible will pull me out of a deep emotional rut. There are days when I just feel more comfortable as a woman, pampered is the word. A nice hot bath, a freshly shaven body and the comfort of something soft and silky. I do enjoy just being a guy and staying in that mode for extended periods of time.

I was just thinking, girls get to dress "manly" for lack of a better term all the time, yet they seem to find the balance. Maybe we just need to find the balance too?

[Alice-n-wonderland]

As humans I think we second guess ourselves on stuff, on life, decisions we made. For me I just have to get back to what I enjoy.