Are any alternative activities to CD effective in reducing dressing?

[cdinmd206]

Golly Ed - The only effective thing that I know reduces and stops the desire to dress is death and that sure isn't a viable alternative.

[Michelle V]

Can't really say it is an alternative because as we all know there is no replacement to feeling like a girl. I would say exercise, it keeps you busy, get endorphins going and work on getting into that dress that is amazing but super tight.

[Jenniferathome]

Anything that occupies a substantive amount of time can act as a barrier. Great physical output will both take time and make you tired so that dressing is maybe too much of an effort. Still, the need or urge has never gone away, it just got forced back. I will rear it's head.

How about talking to your wife about boundaries she can live with such as x hours a week or a month, etc. AND come up with a thing you two can do together as a male/female couple.

Quitting is not realistic. We all know that.

[cathie pantyhose]

I personally am not aware of any distraction that will honestly work. My wife asked the same thing only for me to purge and end up buying more things to replace.

I've spent my time climbing mountains, running, cycling, back pack camping in the middle of no where for weeks in foreign countries all over the world and even if I don't take things to wear, the minute I get home I change in to fem wear. I've slept at 30,000 feet in pantyhose and wolford tights so I'm leaving it behind any longer

Personally it doesn't pay to try to avoid it. It always come back and I regret trying to avoid it. I wish I could dress more often with more gurls. Wife doesn't like to talk about it except when she comes across my "stash"

[Rachael Leigh]

Actually I'm working on stepping back my dressing right now. I'm trying a few things nothing specific but I'm just not sure it will totally go away. I think sometimes we need to step back a bit and hopefully I won't go crazy like I've been going over the last couple of months

[bimini1]

You just never know. It seems the more I pursue it outside the house (support groups, outings, etc) that seems to take the edge off the need to do it so often. You may find that once you get what you thought you wanted you realize you really did not want it all that badly in the first place I do not know.

[Barbara Dugan]

Gardening normally does it but lately lost interest on it

[dianne_1234]

For me, sometimes dressing more can reduce the need to dress.

If I "never" dress 'til I've had enough, then I've never had enough dressing.

[Angie G]

Almost all I do at home is done dressers my wife doesn't mind. So I haven't a clue hun.
Angie

[Caden Lane]

It almost sounds as if your wife wants a cure. And if thats the case, no wonder your psychologist or therapist couldn't provide you with data, as there is no cure per se, and doctors are morally bound to not try and cure gender dysphoria of any type.

[kimdl93]

what does she think would be an adequate result? Does she feel that you should spend NO time dressing? It seems that she's missing the point. I doubt that you dress for lack of diversions. You probably dress because you like to. You could conceivably fill your day with activities of most any kind, and not allow yourself one minute of spare time, shower, hit the sack and repeat that process for the duration of your life....but again to what end. Maybe she needs to find a diversion for herself that will allow you a bit of time for an activity you have enjoyed for a lifetime.

[PinkieM]

Golly Ed - The only effective thing that I know reduces and stops the desire to dress is death and that sure isn't a viable alternative.

I would not recommend death as an option oh my!

[Babbs]

Curse? are you crazy? (I mean that in a nice way lol). I find it a blessing! I'm lucky to get a thrill in life that not many others experience. Not to mention it's safe and really pretty much non intrusive on others. I've read others equating this with a sin. Really? what sin? Most of us who are married don't cheat on our wives. Most I talk to here are nice, friendly, giving etc... How are they cursed? How is that a sin? Enjoy life and the good things in it. CDing is a good thing not a curse...just my opinion....Oh, Karren, pretty funny on the Hockey comments, lol.

[Sometimes Steffi]

Try ice hockey.... its amazing... expensive and takes lots of time... I'm playing in two leagues and skating on weekends... and you get to wear girdles.... garter belts and stockings! lol

The last time I wore girdles, garter belts and stockings FOR HOCKEY, I didn't feel at all femme in them, because the ones used for hockey are not at all feminine!

[Jaymees22]

Have you thought of joining a nudist group, no dressing there!!!

[ClosetED]

I agree my wife wants a cure, and I doubt one exists. But I can ask this group, because if anyone would know of one or effective reducers, this is the world's experts. I can see many are struggling with the same situation, and the more it can be confirmed, the better others may have of accepting us. I do think the amount of dressing varies from person to person, but I also agree that doing it does both help reduce the need to dress and the level of dressing needed. There hasn't much comment on whether having someone support you affects the dressing - does it increase the desire or reduce it? It may depend on the kind of "excitement" (to bother from another thread) it causes in the SO.
Having lots of sex sounds interesting, but I'm not positive it will really keep the desire away as it seems to fill a different need. Playing games with a female avatar also does not seem to be be a valid substitue-Bridget, can you say it really reduced your desire to dress?

[Tina B.]

First I had a great answer, then thought of something serious to say. I think a lot depends on a couple of factors. How often are you dressing, how important it to you, like what happens if you don't dress.
There are some here that say they do it for fun, others do it for relief, because not dressing causes a lot of stress. I'm sorry, but if you fall in the latter group it will be hard to stop for any real length of time, certainly not enough to suit your wife.
Now for the answer I wanted to start with. I found a heart bypass stopped me from thinking about dressing for at least 3 months, but in all honesty, as soon as my chest was well enough for it, I had a bra back on.
Good Luck, if you find something that does work, and doesn't leave you unhappy with it, please share, many here have been looking for it.

[Lorileah]

a cure would imply that being TG is some sort of medical illness. I think maybe education would be a better idea.

Yesterday a client was telling me about her male friend who came out as gay a few years ago. His parents are very strict religiously and forced him to be "cured". Now he is dating a GG and is engaged. The client was not convinced the marriage would be founded on love but was more his way of appeasing his parents. I agree, there is no "cure" for who you are. You can be manipulated into pretending to be something or someone else. Forcing someone to be who they are not will lead to other issues, things that could effect your life in the long run. In my opinion, learning as much as you can about a lifestyle and if you love the person, learning to live WITH that lifestyle is better

[Sallee]

I sure don't know anything I do think physical activity helps but why not try it in drag. I have and didn't enjoy drag that much Didn't need a sweaty stinky bra and forms.
My arn is in a sling now for 7 weeks and that is keeping me out of bras but may be I'll just be flat chested for an afternoon. LOL

[ClosetED]

In case any were interested, the therapist suggested a method which can be found at http://selfleadership.org
He had no data to show it helped in CDing, but it did help those with stress and anxiety. His hope is that if you control those, you get more control over CDing. Claims it can be worked on in a few sessions.
I did show him this thread, but he did not read many. I summarized for him.

[Jordan]

There is nothing that can stop me I love it to much

[Jocelyn Quivers]

Believe for most of my life I've tried and nothing worked because it was never an option. No matter what I did the desire or thoughts were always lurking in my mind, and even if I went through periods of going cold turkey it was as if the entire purpose of my life was to be all male and never cross dress. This was very similar to another area during my younger years which caused lots of pain and torment for me and that was dating. Due to a lot of the heartache I experienced from in that area I attempted to find ways to go through life without the need for dating, relationships etc. What I started discovering was that desire to meet the girl of my dreams was something that I was born with and there was no way trying to get around it. Same with the cding/trans thing, or as the term I to use is "its permanent file on the internal hard drive that cannot be deleted."

[suchacutie]

What we are really talking about is a set of distractions, not an abatement of inherent desire or need. We can list work stress, having someone else living in your home, committed group memberships, and 'man' tasks that involve getting filthy!

The negative from the point of view of your wife is these activities will generally take you from her as well. So, the only real answer is to find activities you are both happy doing together. Even with that, it's just putting off the inevitable need to experience your femme self, which is also the best activity the two of you can do together.

[Adriana Moretti]

a cure would imply that being TG is some sort of medical illness. I think maybe education would be a better idea.

You can be manipulated into pretending to be something or someone else. Forcing someone to be who they are not will lead to other issues, things that could effect your life in the long run.

Lorileah makes some VERY valid points....I hate to see people go through life like that....you are here (on earth) for such a short time to begin with. Why be unhappy and uncomfortable .

[ClosetED]

I agree that what my wife wants me to find is a distraction. Or for the hard drive metaphor, "Since you can't delete the file, then just don't open it". We do many things together, but they do not distract the desire. She is willing to give up time with me in exchange. She mentioned buy a boat (her father had a boat). I like to go fishing, but why add to the hassle and stress of caring for a boat, maintaining it. She still thinks any relaxation method will work. This group is the best evidence that nothing has been shown to work for this particular desire and this particular outlet. But how can I get her to change her view/belief without trying or showing something she will believe? Only when she is willing to change to tolerate/accept me can we live a better life (or return to the life I thought I had with her when she pretended to tolerate it).