I don't question what I'm doing any more than why am I short, bald and Polish,
I don't question what I'm doing any more than why am I short, bald and Polish,
I actually just recently quit asking that question. I did for years. I was able to accept my dressing because it kinda hit me like a ton of bricks....I am a cd! And I'm more than happy with that! Now I am looking to take a few more steps like finally going out to a club. It totally helped that I have a couple GG who are totally on board with it! I find I'm much happier now that I don't ask myself that question anymore!
I no longer wonder, what I am doing. I wonder why I cannot much more often.
I question What am I doing more now than I did 40 years ago. I started as most here and progressed to fully transforming when I dress and going out. I have since found that going out is really not that exciting and fully transforming is becoming more difficult to maintain the look I want. So yes many times lately I plan on an evening to dress and then change my plans because it just isn't worth the trouble. I made a Vow to myself years ago I never want to see an old wrinkled woman looking back at me in the mirror and sadly she is creeping into it.
OMG had to add this thought. I wonder if there are any Crossdressers living in nursing homes or do they just exchange their panties for depends?
Last edited by kendra_gurl; 04-17-2014 at 04:51 PM.
All the time! I want to dispose of all my girl stuff sometimes and have in the past, only to come back. It's such a mystery to me, but it's still part of who I am. I am a man in all respects, but a woman Ã*s well. It's just a mystery that we deal with. Sometimes...most the time... I am just me... the male, but I always have Jenny here as a part of me. I love being me....the man...cutting wood, fishing, hunting..all the guy stuff, but I'm also Jenny...the sweet demure, sexy and classy girl. We're weird and misunderstood. I choose to just accept the fact that I am a man and a woman in one body. It may seem a crappy hand when you are both male and female in personality, but with patience and love for both sides of yourself, you can see it as a blessing.
Hi, I have questioned this once when I felt a little depressed. Now I look at this ageing male in the mirror until I get all femmed up......then I think it's all so worth it as I love looking so much younger and different.
Yes it can take time but the rewards seem so rewarding.
Love Heather XX
this is all linked to biology and genetics, even if it has not yet been proven, then the question is not why am I doing this, but how can I do this in a society that has judged this to be an evil of sorts and still maintain my sanity.
If some portion of the population both male and female feel the need to be dressed as or BE the opposite gender, it can't have any "nurture " origins. so we find that the conflict is not in doing this but is coming to terms with a society that does not approve. We feel guilt because we THINK we've done something bad, but in reality it IS part of us and the bad part is the lack of acceptance. so we are conflicted between what society dictates and what our inner "mind" dictates as natural. It is not necessarily something to "accept" anymore than do we struggle to accept being blue-eyed or left handed. some people are born with a disposition to illness, which could be mental, diabetes, 6 toes, dwarfism, etc., we are born with some mixed up genetic material that makes us look male and yet have some desires that reflect a female nature".
If we could fix the almost near total lack of education about sex, physiology, biology and other aspects of human growth ,we could do away with a lot of the problems we experience. If kids from early on understood that some people are born with male genitals, and some with female genitals and some are born with BOTH, and that some are born with a genetic alphabet soup, when they encounter those differences it would not be the kind of negative experience that it is still for most people. They would already know that there are gender variations. Everyone is just exactly who they are.
JUST a crossdresser
I may be in the minority here, but if society totally accepted me crossdressing, I would probably not find it as exciting and fulfilling as I do. would be nice to not get beat up or shunned, but there is something exciting about being different!
Hi Erica Marie, I sometimes have that feeling as I an getting undressed.
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
I agree with it all. I am a man. I am a CD'er. It helps me "feel" my feminine side. Society does agree it's good to be balanced (ying/yang, etc) and have both warrior (doing) and maiden (feeling) behaviours. The gap is that it doesn't accept the balance in a literal (clothing) sense. Why do we (the CDer's) have these needs and not the other 90% of the population? Genetics I guess, just like other traits. All I know is that I knew at about 12 years old that I was very attracted to girl panties. That hasn't changed in 40 years. What has changed is that I shamelessly buy sexy bikini panties and camisoles of wild colours for myself, because I LOOK and FEEL so good in them. (I underdress at work 100% of the time, and not aware of anyone noticing....)
My only regret is that I must hide it (kids)
Julie
On one hand, you can examine, and explore, and analyze till you are totally worn out (I know, I have done so, and still do...tee hee)
but ultimately this is the hobby, rather than the dressing itself.. The dressing is more like breathing. Take time to learn why you breathe, if it is interesting to you, but more importantly, just accept that you have to breathe. Breathing is a whole lot easier when you just relax and let it happen.
As to guilt, I try to remember that there is a big difference between guilty feelings, and feelings and thoughts aimed at simply avoiding discomfort in the presence of others. Obviously, there are many, many people who simply do not get what we are about, and are filled with disapproval, scorn, hatred etc....but that is their problem not mine, unless I allow them to make it mine. It isnt a battle against guilt at all, but rather a battle to stay out of entanglements with other peoples negative baggage. Isn't it? It sure is for me...tee hee
I often wonder what I'm doing, but then I remember learning in a class once that gender isn't just male and female, but on a figurative scale, and everyone in the world measures differently on that scale, so instead of there being 2 genders, there's 7 billion, and while mine isn't accepted widely in society, it's still my own unique gender and I can accept that.
Posting Permissions
