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Thread: Survey (success with coming out to SO)

  1. #1
    Junior Member
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    Survey (success with coming out to SO)

    I am hoping to eventually get into another relationship, and am wondering whether coming out would end the relationship.

    So two questions:
    A: When you came out to a SO in the past, did it? 1. end the relationship, 2. strain the relationship, but it's still going. 3. It's great, I have the best of both.
    B: For those if you in a commited relationship today: 1. I'm hiding it. 2. I came out, but it's a sore point. 3. I came out successfully. (2 and 3 are the same as above.)

    Julie

  2. #2
    Martini Girl Katey888's Avatar
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    Julie - I hope you (or someone) is going to put this all into a nice powerpoint pie chart or graph at some point - I'm defo not going back through dozens of posts trying to work out the stats..

    B: 1. for me...

    Katey x
    "Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
    Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear"
    Stefani Germanotta

  3. #3
    Super Moderator DAVIDA's Avatar
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    I told Jean the night that I asked her to marry me.
    She said, "So?".
    We are in our 24th year of marriage now.
    I sit here in a dress and she is sitting in the kitchen.

    So I would be A-3.

  4. #4
    Genny iGenny's Avatar
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    B-1 for me.

  5. #5
    Gone to live my life
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    Hi Julie. I came out to my wife after 24 years of marriage. In response to your survey:

    A. 3
    B. 3

    Hugs

    Isha

  6. #6
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    B-3 forme. My wife was shocked at first but has been greet the last 46 years

  7. #7
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    Hi Julie, A-3 just had our 50th anniversary.
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member Noel Chimes's Avatar
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    A 2. B 2. At first she was comfortable with me but as time went on she became reluctant to acknowledge me in "doll" mode.
    If the clothes make the man then the makeup makes the woman.

  9. #9
    Aspiring Member Lacey New's Avatar
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    Alas, B.1. - and it will always B that way.

  10. #10
    Danielle cdinmd206's Avatar
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    I guess I am a B1. We are presently separated but CDing had little if anything to do with it. She was ok with my dressing and we even went out together quite a few times with me totally dressed.

  11. #11
    0 to trans in 60 seconds! Donnagirl's Avatar
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    A2
    B2

    And it is still hard work....
    Call me Donna, please

  12. #12
    Little Mrs. Snarky! Nadine Spirit's Avatar
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    Um... Not sure about the scale with the past and present.

    I think I get it so I will say B-3

  13. #13
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    I came out before we were engaged. We've been married for 15 years and she's witnessed my progression from underdressed to living nearly full time en femme. It got to be too much for her and I have backed off to some degree.
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  14. #14
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    A-1.
    We separated 4 months after I came out.

  15. #15
    Member devida's Avatar
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    A.3, b.3

  16. #16
    Aspiring Member Ellie52's Avatar
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    For me I couldn't be happier. Ive been married 28 years and my wife is very supportive. I told her about 3 years ago and today I have a whole closet full of clothes/lingerie and shoes. I wear tie wrap skirts all the time around the house/garden/driveway and some shops. Our son and the neighbors dont care and people in the shops have never commented yet. For me I am living a dream as I have tried going out en femme but didn't enjoy it (I felt very silly, like I was at a party that I had been told was a fancy dress party but nobody else was dressed in fancy dress) and much prefer wearing a skirt with male attire, and occasionally getting dolled up for some photo's. Thats just me though...

  17. #17
    Happy to be me!! S. Lisa Smith's Avatar
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    I am among the most fortunate. I am a 3 in both. I came out after about 17 years of marriage (and two CD Halloweens, and going to my cousin's 50 birthday party that was women only en femme). While my wonderful wife is supportive to a point, she doesn't want to meet the Lisa me. That being said, she asked me if I wanted to dress yesterday while she was out.
    Last edited by S. Lisa Smith; 04-20-2014 at 05:02 PM.

  18. #18
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    A3 / B3. I love being her husband, partner, lover and BGF ... after 46 years. And Happy Annverisary Orchid, that is special!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  19. #19
    Member Adriana's Avatar
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    Hi Julie, I came out to my wife after dating for 2 month's. ..I know crazy, but it worked out great. A) 3 B) 3 been married for 7 years now

  20. #20
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    My wife "discovered" me about 25 years ago quite by accident.
    That incident was a 2.


    10 years ago I couldn't take the hiding anymore and told her outright that I had to be me and I had to express myself this way.
    That started as a 2 and after much conversation, many tears and lots of learning became a 3. And I'm so very happy that it did, for now I truly have the best of both worlds....my expression and her support.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  21. #21
    Senior Member MissTee's Avatar
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    Hey Julie,

    A3, B3 for me. Married nearly 40 years now.

  22. #22
    Junior Member Carly CD's Avatar
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    A= 1 and 3 The first S/O I came out too it ended the relationship, but when I came out to my wife shortly after we got married, it has went great ever since.

    B= 3

  23. #23
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    I came out to my wife of 46 years about 7 years ago, And it's been awesome.
    Angie

  24. #24
    Super Moderator Raychel's Avatar
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    I did come out successfully, it did strain the relationship at the time, but now it is great, I have the best of both. So, B3, A2, A3, in that order
    my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress

    "Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"

  25. #25
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    B3, married 27 years. Came out 3 years ago.

    I want to add that I am affirm believer that cross dressing does not end relationships. It may change your relationship. Cross dressing can be the proverbial 'straw that breaks the camels back' but any relationship that has a strong foundation can survive this revelation. Many here have proven that. This does not mean riding unicorns into the sunset will be the result. DADT can be the result as well. Can you be objective about your relationship? How solid is it?
    Last edited by Jenniferathome; 04-20-2014 at 09:21 AM.

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