Straight and getting hit on when out dressed?

[PaulaQ]

@Jennifer - no, having a chaser single you out doesn't mean he's looking for another man. There are puh-lenty of gay bars full of men. Some of them are pretty darn manly looking men. Muscle men, regular looking dudes, big ol' bears - you name it, there's a dude out there for you if you are looking for a dude. There are, I'm sure, gay guys who really like drag queens - but that's mostly not who hits on us.

No, many of the guys who hit on TGs are chasers - looking for someone who isn't quite a man, but isn't quite a woman either - the best of both worlds. And while I'm told that some of these guys can actually be very nice, and appreciate us - especially us pre-op TS girls - my encounters with them have been scary, dangerous, and quite unwanted.

edit: Clarification - I'm not straight. I'm a queer woman. Make of that what you will. Unwanted attention from a man, particularly if it's aggressive and scary is not a pleasant experience.

[mechamoose]

There is a segment of guys who like us "in between" folks.

You take your approval where you can get it, I guess. we want one thing (acceptance, understanding) but there are a bunch of folks who like us because we walk in between..
they I know it isn't what we desire the most, but that doesn't invalidate their wants. But it doesn't invalidate ours either.

We like what we like, they like what they like.

- MM

[Alice Torn]

So much lonliness in this modern world. I feel for them, as i also am alone have no one.

[Lexi Moralas]

When I was able to go out dressed , and seemed to pass ok I guess , because I did get hit on , even by lesbians at a gay bar once or twice. I started wearing a cheep engagement and wedding band set I bought a Claire's for like $20.
It worked wonders, and when I if I still got approached I would simply hold up my hand , show the ring and manage to squeeze out an " sorry I'm happily married " in me best girly voice. The best part is if my voice gave me away. This approach have the guy a perfect escape as well

[ReineD]

When we've been out dressed, the men who did hit on my SO knew that she wasn't a GG. My SO didn't find it difficult to put them off. After all, I think there are plenty of fish out there who are interested in getting hit on by these men.

As to men hitting on GGs generally, this does happen (in my experience a lot more when we're younger than middle aged lol) but very rarely are they so flagrantly obstinate about it that you can't put them off by simply saying you aren't interested … at least this holds true in the circles that I frequent. Not sure about dive bars where everyone is drunk though.

[kimdl93]

Let's face it, when a 6'3" 225 lb person dons a wig, forms and a corset, it's still difficult to disguise the obvious. No guy...straight or gay has shown any such interest. Oddly enough, the only interest that I picked up on has been from women...straight and bi women. I was flatterd, had some wonderful conversations, but I'm also very much monogamous.

[mechamoose]

Aren't you happy to be hit on?

Why does it matter which gender does so?

"Hi cutie!"

Wouldn't that make you feel good? Regardless of who said it?

- MM

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Sherry, You are just too darn cute for your own good.

[sanderlay]

I have yet to be hit on by any men. But I have had more women take an interest in me than I ever did when I presented as a man. It has certainly been a conversation starter and certainly a few complements. What I commonly hear is...

"It's nice to see a man embrace his femininity."

I guess I must be doing something right.

[Jennifer Kelly]

I'm a size 24W. I'm 5'11" and weigh about 250. That puts me square in the BBW category so I haven't had this experience yet. Although my first time out, I did have a lesbian tell me I looked hot. Maybe she was into bigger girls. But more realistically she probably knew I was a guy and was simply complimenting my outfit. Either way it was kind of cool.

[Adriana Moretti]

Getting hit on is nice unless it gets a little to pushy...thats when its good to have strength in numbers too...but if your out in public you need to expect those sort of things to happen..I seen alot of girls pull out witty "wife" comments to deflate the situation...at the end of the day your a guy though, and you should know how to handle yourself and any situation.

[LelaK]

I doubt if I'd ever go out in public dressed. I'd more likely go to events among people I know, not to bars, dances, or concerts. I wouldn't want to encounter anyone who may hate CDs, gays etc. The only exception might be being on stage in public, where they wouldn't have easy access to me any way.

[Sometimes Steffi]

My first line of defense is an obnoxiously large (fake) engagement ring.

My second line of defense is my wing(wo)man. The one time I really needed her she was ROFL and let me deal with it

My third line of defense is to say, "Thank you, but I'm not really into men."

But I've come to the point where I don't feel that guys who like girls like us should be treated as "wierdos" and more than I like being treated as a wierdo.

So, I'd really like to be able to treat them as a guy who is attracted to me, but to tell them, "Don't expect to get lucky tonight. I'm in a committed relationship."

[5150 Girl]

Well, on the one hand, Just because you don't wanna go to the party, doesn't mean it isn't flattering to be asked.
However: Usually just informing them that I am a lesbian is enough. However, there was this one time, this guy insisted on putting his arm around me. Brushing it off he wasn't getting it. So the next time he sneaked his arm around me, I sunk my nails into his arm, and brought him to his knees looked him square in the eye and said what part of "I'm a lesbian" don't you understand?