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Thread: middle sexes and revealing bi sexualality in my cross dressing

  1. #1
    Member barbara gordon's Avatar
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    Aug 2009
    new york city

    middle sexes and revealing bi sexualality in my cross dressing

    hello ladies

    I have just realized after almost 4 decades of cross dressing That I am a mixed gender and i am bisexual in my desires .
    (ahem , I guess that I knew this for a long time , but could not admit it . Severalweeks ago there was an article in the newyork times March 20 magazine that discussed an interpretation of bisexuality . There was some reference made to linking transgender and cross dressing with bisexual …..
    The followup comments to the article expressed some controversy .
    I was surprised to see the article in the first place appearing in the new york times sunday mag.
    but I read it . and it inspired me to look deeper into myself. controversy or not I am glad it was there.

    i love being a cross dresser , because it allows me to shift my gender from one to another . I do not know why I am this .
    But I am . being a cross dresser is not just about clothing. it is way deeper than that . feminine and masculine is contextual . the feeling of being a temporary female is exhilarating .

    I think that cross dressing is a sub category of transsexuality . It was a difficult secret for me for most of my life …. it cost me my marriage from my love .

    The article sent me on a different research path into the web so I can understand myself.
    Last week I stumbled on a youtube video of a documentary made in 2005 called "middle sexes" it is almost 10 years old . but very relevant to the mystery of what it means to be in the middle .

    this is a complicated post that might seem all over the place , but is just the iceberg to what i can finally understand and admit to myself .

  2. #2
    Banned Read only
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    Apr 2012

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Nov 2011
    Lowestoft UK. Beverley was here.
    Your post may be all over the place but it seems like you are searching for the holy grail, whatever that is.
    Yes check out the link in the previous post.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  4. #4
    BEING YOUnique is AWESOME Princess Chantal's Avatar
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    Jul 2008
    Winnipeg, MB, Canada
    Quote Originally Posted by barbara gordon View Post
    I think that cross dressing is a sub category of transsexuality .
    Your crossdressing may be, not mine and many others

  5. #5
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Almost the Great White North...
    It might be a good time for a refresh on gender terminology. It gets confusing when people use terms in different ways, without at least explaining their interpretation of meaning. This thread provides some commonly accepted definitions.

    Don't feel alone. As Princes Chantall says, many CDrs are simply heterosexual males who enjoy dressing as women - for a variety of reasons. And there are some who, either early or later in life, discover that they wish to live as women. And there are an abundant variety of individuals between who have equally diverse motivations.

    Easy come, easy go;
    Easy left me long ago...

  6. #6
    Banned Spammer
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Between here and there but mostly here close to the donuts.
    There is no need to put yourself in a box or category. Just because you like to dress doesn't mean you are bi sexual.
    Sexual preference has nothing to do with gender.
    Getting lost in the terminology and referring to studies will only cloud the issue for you.
    You are you and you don't have to conform or fit to any so called study model.

  7. #7
    Martini Girl Katey888's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Old Hampshire, UK
    Barbara - was it this article ?:

    It's an interesting read - and if it's helped you to a better understanding of yourself, then that's a good thing!

    I don't think you're alone here - although you might be in a minority... And I don't think those folk who identify as hetero (like me...) should feel threatened or offended by your perspective - it just shows we reflect all the sexual complexity of the muggles amongst our group... the gender expression does make it a more complex thing to understand though...

    It wouldn't surprise me if there is some tenuous link between gender expression and sexuality - but I also get the feeling that societal mores and fashionable behaviour provide an attraction for some...

    Katey x
    "Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
    Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear"
    Stefani Germanotta

  8. #8
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    I sometimes think we over complicate issues and see all the boxes lined with the different labels on and wonder which one we fit in !
    We may not fit in one box and head off for more information but then we find more boxes to fit in !
    You have to be careful with these sort of articles because of the readership they're printed for they may not be specific enough or they're written by so called experts that haven't researched the subject enough but don't forget you will always find contradictory articles.

    You mention you think you might be bisexual, is that still a thought or is based on an occurrence ? Many Cds have thoughts like this sometime the majority come to realise they just enjoy the dressing and they don't have a gender issue. Admittedly when fully dressed you can look attractive, but who to ? most GGs aren't interested ! most gay men aren't interested, so you're left with a group who are basically hetro but may be attracted to a CDer ! I'm not sure if I dare put a label on them !
    Last edited by Teresa; 06-18-2014 at 01:53 PM.

  9. #9
    Member barbara gordon's Avatar
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    Aug 2009
    new york city
    thanks to all who respounded

    I meant to use the word "transgender" (not transexual) and I still think that "cross dressing" is a kind of sub category of " transgender"..

    I also realize that its all subjective to who is telling the story …we each have a unique experience …

    my own experience is constantly evolving … it is always and still a bunch of questions for me as to why I like to crossddress.

    one main idea that I wanted to mention is that I have no desire to ever live 24/7 as a woman , but the same feeling applies for me not wanting to live 24/7 as a man .
    This is where i finally realized that I really find comfort going back and fourth .. its not androgyny either .. its expressing as a male and then expressing s a woman . i love to dress up in pretty things and I am comfortable doing full on makeup hair clothes etc and going out and interacting fully dressed. It is also just as important to me to be able to switch back to male mode.

    The sexuality part seems to link to how I am feeling … it is possible to switch roles in bed as much it is possible to switch roles by change of clothing
    it is possible to act passive or aggressive with any partner .

    oh,and how about this idea of a word : "bi-gendered"

  10. #10
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    S.E.Baltimore Co. Maryland USA
    Hi Barb, There are as many category's as there are crossdressers.
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

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