That was great!
That was great!
Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.
Eleanor Roosevelt
At my local Outback restaurant, there is a very sweet girl who has transitioned. She has long curly hair and is actually pretty quiet. I noticed her one night when visiting another server who is a good friend of mine. She said she is very sweet but also extremely quiet. Apparently she has been subjected to a lot prejudice and had many bad experiences so she mainly keeps to herself now. Is very sad how this world treats those who are different, but I am happy to know there are others like me close by.
Being "sighted" mostly sucks for a woman like that because it reminds her how people really see her as not really a woman, and that she is someone who needs to be pointed out and talked about. At least thats the way it makes me feel when I am the sighted and talked about.
I once spent 10 or 15 minutes talking to a cross dresser working in the small appliance dept. of a local Sears store. I'd like to be able to say that due to my 50+ years of experience that I spotted her immediately. But no, I merely left Sears with a vague feeling that something wasn't right..... Then approx. a year later . someone said to me " have you ever saw the cross dresser that works at Sears?... boy did I feel stupid
Danielle
OK arbon I'm sorry I mentioned it at all.
I'll sit in the corner and be quiet.
Last edited by Tracii G; 07-07-2014 at 11:04 PM.
Hi Tracii
I will be nice, I promise! I want to talk more about it though.
It gets a little tricky sometimes because both crossdressers and transsexuals could be considered TG.
In this case your seeing her at her job, so most likely not a crossdresser. But there is an assumption here that she is "one of us", a crossdresser, and there is some sort "solidarity" (this is what I get irritated at). Its seen in most of the replies to your topic.
But is that right?
And consider AlyCats response to your topic - she is referring about another woman that her coworkers are obviously talking about and pointing out to people (they did to alycat). Do people consider her a woman?
Or Danielle's example of the crossdresser working in the sears store - was the person really a crossdresser?
So my question are how do you and others here really see women like the one you saw at work? What do you think she is? Do you think she is a woman, or a crossdresser, or something else? What makes her like you and other crossdressers?
Well, I must say that the reason she brought the girl up in the first place is because I had just moved into the area and she was helping me network with support groups and others like myself. She is friends with the girl and one of the few people the girl is open with so it was more about introductions. My friend told me a little bit about her only so that we had more of an understanding about each other. She had told the girl about me as well. (With my permission of course.) My friend is a very sweet girl and she does nothing to offend anyone. She is very careful about asking if it is Ok to talk to others about different topics.
That aside, I do think it's sad what this girl has gone through. I have been subjected to a very similar ridicule so I can certainly understand why she is so reserved. I remain an open book however. My belief is... If you close yourself off, no one will know who you truly are. And that my friends is a tragedy. We are all beautiful and have so much to offer this world. Living in hiding is no life to live. We have to take risks. Does that sometimes result in ridicule? Sometimes, but when we choose our friends wisely, we can enjoy life to it's fullest.
Aly - it will be interesting to see how you feel after transition, if you like being an open book still. And what will that mean really? That it is okay if people see you as a man, a crossdresser, a transgender person, someone in between?
or are you just going to want to live your life as the woman you are?
Where I live its a low population area and I transitioned in place. So there is no secret about me ----- being reminded how people really see me is a frequent occurrence, and it can hurt. And I am not even talking about the ridicule and harrasment crap, thats lot easier to deal with. I am just talking about the little stuff that happens all that time, thats always feels like a challenge to your identity as a woman. Its not so easy
Last edited by arbon; 07-08-2014 at 02:08 PM.
Tracii said “she gave me a close look up and down and gave me a thumbs up gesture which I thought was cool.”
The one that was sighted was Tracii not the person in question. The clerk actually gave a thumbs up and was the one showing the solidarity.
Personally I am 6’6 and 275 pounds. No amount of make up/surgery/money would ever get me to the point to where I could pass. With that said I pretty much do this whole cross dressing, transgendered, whatever one wants to call it 24/7 now.
I’ve spotted others like myself (Somewhere on that spectrum) and it’s good to know that I am not alone. That there are others like me. I like running into people LIKE me. They see me and give me the thumbs up… Hell yeah that would make me pretty happy.
Solidarity is a great thing and wish we had more of it.
I understand. I don't think I'll ever forget where I came from, but I can see your point completely. When people ask questions, I can guage if they are asking out of simple curiosity vs being a smart @$$. If someone does ask in a way I don't see fitting, I politely let them know that it's none of their business and leave it at that. I do think it's important for people to understand us and know that our everyday struggle is real.
But! That being said, we'll revisit this topic in a few years and see if, like you said, I still have the same views lol.
Originally Posted by CD_blue
In the past Tracii has posted about her interactions in public with women while she is dressed in a feminine manner, and in those interactions she has indicated that she is usually looked over and received approving comments or gestures. Were those women "one of us" and part of the spectrum to?
I don't know the women or the post your referring to so I couldn't answer. Regardless, Tracii told of positive encounter at a gas station where the clerk gave Tracii the thumbs up. The thread turns into "You dont' see the clerk in the same manner as you do a real female"
What your doing is asking a question though in reality your making a statement. Your saying that many of us don't see transitioned females in the same light as we do genetic females. That is perfectly good statement and I think it is completely worth discussing. Why pick this thread?
Me... If I assumed the clerk was a genetic female I would be like "yay!" if she had transitioned I would be like "yay!"
I would just be happy with the thumbs up and heck I might even make a post about it myself on here. Then again chances are I would do like I do on most post I make here.... Write it out then delete it after thinking about how someone is going to for some reason will get upset about it.
Again, I think your question is worth asking. I just don't think Tracii or anyone saying "awesome nice act of solidarity" are in the wrong. Nor do I hardly think they were saying "That isn't no REAL woman!"...
It was just simple story. Nothing more.
Well to be honest I think the "person" was either a "person" in transition or possibly 24/7 I don't know for sure.
I didn't make a big deal out of seeing the "person" I just smiled and treated the "person" a I would anyone.
I never marginalized the "person" in anyway,maybe this "person" was just starting a new life living as a woman heck I don't know for sure.
I showed respect and got respect in return.
Last edited by Katey888; 07-09-2014 at 03:03 AM. Reason: Not necessary - see my post later in thread
I can recall recent posts where Traci mentions positive interactions with GGs and this one, which happened to involve one of the community. I don't see a problem here. Tracii gets out, she presents herself as she chooses, generally with a decidedly feminine twist, and from all her posts, I gather that she's well received by straight and not so straight alike.
Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.
Eleanor Roosevelt
Kim its only a problem for a few here.
Hell why not make a Big Deal out of it ? We are so Private an Rare you almost want to run up to them an give them a Hug or atleast your phone number so maybe just maybe they might call or text an you can finally talk to a person with the same problems as you . Just because someone is happy so deep in the closet sure doesn't mean we all are ! Hell they have some long time chics on here are past all that lolly gagging stage an want to talk to some folks in person an have some friends they can see face to face . An even if they called you don't mean yull click with they age difference an all the other crap ,, It's like trying to win the Dam Lottery finding a local friend when there is no Local meetings . All of you that have local meeting an groups count your blessings that you don't live here . If I see a Sister I make it my bizzness to say or do Something nice .. There like Big foot sittings ,,lol,,,,
Stacy I love the way you put things!!!.
Members,
Tracii has related a good experience here that was respectful and discreet - please let's not turn this into something that some of us might have experienced personally and negatively when it seems such a simple and positive interaction.
If anyone wants to talk about their own experiences, they're welcome to start another thread...
Katey
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