Quote Originally Posted by Confucius View Post
I suppose you are asking, "How can I have a happy wife and family, while cross-dressing, sometimes."

Well, there really isn't a cure, but you can live a happy, productive, fulfilling life while still having a cross-dressing condition. Here are a few suggestions that you may find helpful:
1. Communicate with your wife: Yes, she needs to know, otherwise she will feel deceived. She is your wife, and needs to know. Let her know that you struggle with this, and you have always thought that you could make it go away by force of will and self-control, but it won't go away.
2. Understand your wife's needs: Most women need to feel held and loved by a man. Most women need to feel secure and protected by a man. Women need to love a man they can respect and honor. You are her man.
3. Be willing to compromise: Every wife will respond differently to a cross-dressing partner. You need to understand the limits of her tolerance. Tell her that she can set the boundaries and you will do your best to live within her boundaries. She also needs to understand that you have tried to make it go away, and this is something that can't go away. She needs to understand that this makes you happy. You both have needs and you need to compromise to make your marriage work.
4. Value your male virtues: Most cross-dresser suffer from some degree of of female envy. We think that females are the lucky ones and we relish what they have. Relish what is good about manliness; Strength, courage, protecting those who are weaker than us, defending our communities, sacrificing ourselves for the love of our families, and teaching our sons to be self-sufficient, confident, and form bonds with those who share our values. The world needs more good men.
5. Recognize Misandry: Most cross-dressers have problems accepting themselves, and suffer from a low self esteem. However, hatred of men (misandry) is socially acceptable. Popular culture portrays husbands as being inept, stupid, and flawed. Whenever there is a media show where men compete against women, the women win.. 100% of the time. Evil is personified as male. The press constantly tries to give young women more self-esteem. What about saying a few words of encouragement to males with poor self-esteem?

Most likely your brain is hard-wired for cross-dressing. The neural connections just interpret cross-dressing as actual contact with a woman, and it releases appropriate neurotransmitters (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, etc.), and these neurotransmitters are responsible for the sensations of well-being, pleasure, gratification and bonding that make us feel happy. You cannot stop your brain from releasing neurotransmitters. However, you can still keep this under control, limited, and within your own self imposed boundaries. Many men before you have been cross-dressers and have succeeded in living productive, and happy married lives.
This is just reinforcing the same old tired gender roles that men are supposed to go around saving people and women are supposed to cook their dinner. Women are very capable if being self-sufficient and confident and defending their communities. It's the people who hold these out dated values that have always taught them they're not. And the whole man hate thing I find ridiculous. Men run the world last time I checked and a dumb male character on tv doesn't change that. Man hate is not the reason many CDs or trans women have self confidence issues. The reason we have self confidence issues is because we were raised by people who drilled these exact gender roles into us and made us feel like failures if we weren't going around saving people from burning buildings and rescuing all those poor helpless women.

You don't need to cure yourself there is nothing wrong with you.