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Thread: Are there cds who really are just comfortable being cds and not transitioning?

  1. #101
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    I feel I am smack dab in the middle of the gender identification scale. I enjoyed playing football, still enjoy teaching and training in traditional Karate, lifting weights, and riding my motorcycle, all as a male. I also enjoy cross-dressing and indulging in female pursuits as they interest me. Seems like the best of both worlds...no transition plans.

  2. #102
    Out and Proud Charla McBee's Avatar
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    If you asked me a couple of years ago when I first joined this site, I'd have insisted that I was just a guy who enjoys crossdressing. I recently looked over those early posts however and looking back I can just see the denial, the refusal to accept obvious signs. I was describing my feelings in much the same way as I do now, only now I am firmly in the TG camp. I still don't know if I'd ever transition but honestly it has been on my mind all along.
    For years I hoped I was just a CDer but now I realize I am transgender and that's alright.

  3. #103
    New Member The Optimist's Avatar
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    I've only recently re-opened my interest in CD and with the help a new friend, I am exploring it much further than before. I don't think I identify myself as very girly yet and don't know if I will do; it's a journey at the minute. I just like the feel of the clothes and the acceptance and attention I receive from my new friend . I have no desire really to transition, I find it fun, scary and exciting to experiment and push the boundaries of rigid gender roles.

  4. #104
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    I'd be delighted to change genders at will with fully functioning equipment to boot. But if I could do that ,I wouldn't need to transition. That would be very cool. But that happens only in fiction. I am a crossdresser because I like the feel and fit of women's clothing and shoes from the skin out. I could not pass to save myself in a fog and dress
    only for myself- a big reason why I dress only in my home. More power to those of you who get outside and can pass as female and to those of you who are transitioning or who have. I am very jealous.
    But on the other hand, I can be me and not have to meet any expectations, so I'll remain just a crossdresser!
    Last edited by Abbyru1; 09-18-2014 at 07:45 PM. Reason: more thoughts
    Pink is more than a color: its an attitude!

  5. #105
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    I like my boring straight guy life and the stability and comfort it provides and I like the escapism that my occasional dressing provides from that and I think I would lose that part of dressing up if I did it more. For me it's a good balance right now that I'd rather not change, other than maybe going out a little more dressed.

  6. #106
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    I'll admit that growing up I wanted to be a girl, and at one point considered transitioning. But not very seriously -- this was at a nadir in my life and career. Like Natcrys, I now have the best of both worlds. Sure I have some of the trappings -- pierced ears, shaved bod, clear nail polish most of the time -- but these are things that just make me feel more comfortable as a woman. Transition? Not for me, 'tho I may be far along on the TG spectrum. There are just too many things on both sides of the gender fence to do!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  7. #107
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    My vote is for the part time CD who has NO desire to transition. Sometimes on this site it seems most are transitioning and It really gives me a lift to again confirm that there are so many others like me out there who just like to dress up once in a while.

    If your wondering why I think it is so important to make it known that I don't want to transition it is because I have read several threads here and other places from GGs that are scared to death that their mate is going to turn into a women. I don't believe that CDing leads to transitioning. I think that is as big of a myth as all Crossdressers are gay! I hate to think of the panic that may be coming over a GG who is trying to figure out why her mate likes to dress and is assuming first he is gay and then he is on the way to transitioning.


    Sorry I have not logged in in a few days and didn't weigh in sooner. I have been rather busy tending to my man side....without regret, unhappiness, or any other ill feelings toward being an ordinary, straight, only part of the time crossdressing, man.

  8. #108
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    I feel a cross dresser does not have the resolve to transition.
    Transitioning is something that comes from deep in the heart and is already wired into the person who will make that decision.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  9. #109
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seana Summer View Post
    If your wondering why I think it is so important to make it known that I don't want to transition it is because I have read several threads here and other places from GGs that are scared to death that their mate is going to turn into a women. I
    Seanna, I have a very close friend I met a long time ago. We crossdressed together and went out a few times and spent time at each other's home dressed. "John" moved away with his wife. They have no children. Both, before marrying, were in group therapy when "John" discussed his feelings about being transexual. Nothing really came of that and he enjoyed his crossdressing all along with the support of his wife. Well, about 8 years ago "John's" wife contacted me to say that he became suicidal and almost made that happen. Just over 7 years ago, John celebrated a new birthday as "Jane." Both are in their 50's and remain married. "Jane" has a great job that's physical in nature and both have never been happier. For the most part "Jane's" family has abandoned her but she could care less at this point. She still is married to her wife. We've discussed that aspect. Even my own wife assures me it's okay to take myself to any level. But that's a different story. I'm just giving an example that there is no black and white in every situation.

    Cheryl

  10. #110
    New Member MariaA's Avatar
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    Well I would have to say that I am happy and that although I may not pass for a true female, I don't have the desire or need to transition. There is always the thought and wonder however, I am good. To add I think it is awesome when I hear about or see people transition. It has to be a very liberating journey, hard but liberating. I have the up most respect for everybody in our lifestyle.

  11. #111
    ghost Anne2345's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaitlyn Michele View Post
    btw the last two people i said that to are now transitioning...
    @Eringirl - You do not know it yet, Erin, but Kaitlyn has just sealed your fate. So you may as well pack up all of your things, head on over to the TS section, take your lumps, and get it over with. Because you are now officially doomed! Doomed, I say!!! DOOOOOMMMMMED!!! Muuuuuahahahahahahahahhaha!!!

    Yup. Totally doomed.

    So sorry. So very sorry. But better luck next time . . . .

  12. #112
    Senior Member MissTee's Avatar
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    I simply love to dress, and I have no desire to transition.

  13. #113
    Part time CD girl Lexi Moralas's Avatar
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    I'm a part time cd with no interest in transitioning

  14. #114
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    I am coming to a crossroads with my dressing. I feel like I want to transition but I have too much other things to consider it possible. i used to think just dressing would be fine and I was happy with it up until recently. Now I am not sure what I want.

  15. #115
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    Vanessa, a lot depends upon your resolve to let's say, "make things right." This has to be the toughest decision anyone can make. For myself I have come to many realizations about what would be right for me. But then again reality and practicality begin to emerge to tell us that we somehow can't. I can understand anyone's true transexual feelings where it's really a do-or-die situation. I have a great friend who was faced with that, and she is now very happy. Only you can sort that out for yourself and with a therapist. My therapist has helped me to find happy mediums that are acceptable in my life.

    Cheryl

  16. #116
    Vespa Vixen AngelaYVR's Avatar
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    Happy the way I am. I love dressing up and recognise that I have masculine and feminine qualities in perfect harmony, not going to mess with a good thing!

    Angela xx

  17. #117
    Silver Member Tina_gm's Avatar
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    I personally cannot envision myself transitioning. Thinking about all it entails, both the physical aspects and what would likely happen in regards to my work, friends, the community I live in, my wife and children, all which would be impacted greatly and with almost all of it, negatively for me. That alone makes the very idea of transitioning not desirable at all to me. Along with the fact that I would likely feel similarly to how I do now, but in the opposite. Yes, there are times I wish I was a woman, times where I wish I was born as one. But times when I am glad I wasn't and am not.
    Chickens should be allowed to cross the road without having their motives questioned

  18. #118
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    i'm perfectly content as a man and i've never thought of transitioning. crossdressing is just a hobby

  19. #119
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    I like myself just the way I am.
    Joni

  20. #120
    Vino, Vidi, Vici! Renee Elise's Avatar
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    No desire whatsoever to transition. I like being a guy most of the time and being able to enjoy femininity sometimes. I'd never want to give up my male persona. I feel that being myself constitutes both the guy and being Renee when I feel girly.

  21. #121
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    Although I may have given the thought of transitioning some thought in the past, age and circumstances have removed that option and, truthfully, I'm ok with that. If I knew 30 years ago what I know now, I might have considered it much more thoroughly.

    Hugs,

    Susie

  22. #122
    Valley Girl Michelle789's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PaulaQ View Post
    Very few people get an easy path through transition. Sucks, but it's the truth.
    The reality is that most young transitioners are dirt poor, often lose their families, and a good many have to resort to sex work to survive and fund transition. Many of them may get stuck in a life of prostitution and drugs, others will move beyond that and live promising lives after enduring years of brutal transition.

    And older transitioners although they usually have money saved up in the bank to help them survive and fund transition, most lose their wife. Many lose some or all of their kids. Some lose entire careers. Others lose jobs but not careers. Some lose houses, cars, money saved in the bank.

    So it doesn't matter what age you transition. People who transition at different ages just face different hurdles. Regardless of age, everyone faces discrimination and threads of physical violence because of being trans.




    Quote Originally Posted by Jenniferathome View Post
    Transsexuals do not finds excuses to not transition. They find ways to make it happen.
    Not necessarily. I am TS, and I fought it tooth and nail for 34 years. I had every desire to be a girl since I was age 5, and felt like I was a girl on the inside all my life. I still thought I was just a crossdresser and that I could go on living as a male, and tried to make every excuse not to transition.

    Now that I have accepted myself as being TS, I no longer make excuses not to transition.

    I personally know of many TS women who fought themselves tooth and nail for decades, and made every excuse not to transition, until one day they accepted themselves and started finding ways to make it happen.


    Most CDers will never transition. However, I believe that most CDers do have a milder version of gender dysphoria. GD that has not progressed, and will most likely never progress, to the extremes of where transition is necessary.
    I've finally mastered the art of making salads. My favorite is a delicious Mediterranean salad.

  23. #123
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    I have asked the same question many times before. There was a time when I would have done anything to transition,but my life situation would not allow it. Now I am content to live part time as a female and deal with it.

  24. #124
    New Member CastleCD907's Avatar
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    You know this is a great question and I myself am a CD who definitely does not plan on transitioning. I work in a primarily female workplace and I honestly get enough feminine interaction to keep the need to go through the transformation. I enjoy my time as a guy and definitely don't have the funds to go through a full transition. Luckily I've gotten a lot better at make-up and being as passable as possible and it also helps that my male counterpart who enjoys me intimately helps provide clothes, makeup and wigs to keep me feminine. But overall I do not believe that most CD's will transition unless they have a very supportive group of people supporting them through the transition.

  25. #125
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    If you really think of transitioning, read the transsexual forum.
    Also google srs surgery. Not what it seems. Most true TS seem to say they
    need to do it, for them its right. Takes lots of counseling from what I read.
    If you like boy you in any way, however slight, CD is where it is.
    Hugs

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