A big thank you and moving on!

[Mariana]

Hi Girls,

I've been a member of this community since the beginning of last year and recently opened some threads asking for help about the confused state I was in.

Since I've posted about this before, I'll be brief: one week ago I had my first therapy session (first time I've shared my gender disorder with someone) which gave me confidence to talk to my girlfriend about it on the next day, receiving some amazing support.

I feel much better now and I need to express my gratitude to this community: it helped me in so many ways I even talked about it to my counselour in this week's session. Even though we do have some brazilian clubs, I was never able to reach the same quality of support I've gotten here. You girls are smart, caring, helpful....I love the level of the debates, the picture and video gallery forum, I've been reading the clothing, shopping and beauty forum daily (even searching for old threads), not to mention the amazing conversations with some members by PMs, specially with Julia Red and Thea Pauline, the two best and most supportive friends I could've right now.

Things are moving on for me. I'm in a phase where I've been looking to myself in every single aspect of my life; not all need to be redefined, but thinking about myself with no barriers envolved is such a wonderful feeling that I'm certainly that it'll make me a better person. I'm in no rush to define myself, but I feel things are moving on. Some things like food habits are already better, I feel like a more a calm person to do everything. That inner chaotic fire that had no explanation seems to be gone. I still have problems, challenges but I feel that after opening up to my most beloved person about this I'm able to achieve everything.

I had an amazing week. My girlfriend has been so deeply involved in this that sometimes I need to remember her I still need to do other things. I would even say she's loving it more than me. She has been giving me gifts almost daily, I have tried so many things I never had before this week that it makes it feel like X-mas for a child. Tomorrow we'll go shopping for the second time. Our relationship has defintely improved in every single aspect I could think of.

Now my challenge is to balance my life with this new aspect. Even though I can't blame myself for being deeply involved in this for a week, I can't do it daily. I need to work, I need to study A LOT, I still have some amazing friends that won't know for a long time. I do want to watch some soccer on Sunday, to take care of my life in general. And with the excitment my girlfiend is also feeling what seems a simple task can become a big problem. She didn't want to go out to reach some friends this weekend, which is fine for me. She wants me to sleep with nighties every single day, and I'm more than happy to do this. But I feel that sometimes I need a break, because doing this every night, even if it's a wonderful feeling, could shadow some other aspects of my life. And we need to be successful: we'll have two girls and four women do need a lot of money. we can't just be apart from the world, even if it's good to feel like that right now.

Since I was never disappointed by this forum I'll keep asking for your help and support.

[Katey888]

Balance and harmony are great things to aspire to and achieve in life... may we all find our own, unique version and ideally, as you have, with our intimate partners...

Katey x

[AmandaJ_DK]

That's one success story! Really cheered me up to read this, especially as I'm in that situation where I'm considering telling my girlfriend about this side of me. I haven't went to therapy sessions though, but seeing how amazingly well your girlfriend reacted gives me hope! You really are lucky for having a girlfriend like that, even if you might feel it's a bit too much right now I'm sure you two will find a nice balance, where you both can enjoy each other.

I hope that one day - hopefully sooner than later - I will be able to tell a story similar to this. It still makes me nervous to think about telling my girlfriend, but reading this board gives me hope and proves that it is possible to have a successful relationship with a woman, even if you are a transvestite/crossdresser. So once again, congrats to you on coming out, Mariana, and congrats on having such an understanding girlfriend. And thank you so much for sharing your story. It means a lot to those of us still in the closet.

[Marcelle]

Hi Mariana,

What a great story and what a great place to be in your life. You hit the nail on the head . . . slow and steady from this point forward until you find your balance.

Hugs

Isha

[flatlander_48]

M:

I see that you are in Brazil. I have been in Rio for the last 2 weeks, but I am going back to the US today. However, I am likely to return. If there is anything that you would like to talk about, please feel free to send me a PM.

Good Luck as you continue your journey!

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Mariana, The first thing you have to do is stop think of this as a Gender Disorder.

[Beverley Sims]

Mariana it is nice to see you progressing.
You need reinforcement from others around you as the forum, although caring, can be a little impersonal sometimes.

Stay with us and share your thoughts anyway.

[Badwolf]

Don't be afraid to come back! There are plenty of people who come and go from here.

For now go ahead and explore the world you've opened up for yourself, and if you do come back, let us know how it all went.