Closeted dressers on Halloween

[~Joanne~]

I have been here two Halloween's now. Every year, some of the seasoned dressers start raining on the parade, as it is, about dressing on Halloween. It's actually already started again. I am proud that some of us actually present well enough, or are confident enough, that every day that they chose to go beyond the doors, they are able to do so and the world doesn't end. There are no lynchings, hangings, or overly bad experiences.

There are a lot of us though they haven't conquered those fears yet, may never do so, or may have an agreement with our SO's not to do so, or any one of thousand excuses that we may have for not going past that threshold as easily as they do.

For a closeted girl, Halloween is the perfect excuse to get out past that door. Do not let anyone keep You from doing so if that is what You chose to do. While I agree that if Your really good at Your makeup, presentation, and walk naturally in Heels and such, there is a chance that those that You encounter will think Your dressing is more than a "costume" but should you really care on that weekend? NO, you shouldn't.

The experience is worth the risk in my opinion. Most of the people you may encounter you may not even know (if, like me, you go a bit out, away from home) and will never see again. The experience is beyond any words I can type here. To feel the wind on your legs, to have your hair blowing, to hear your heels clicking the pavement, to just be comfortable and be yourself beyond the confines of your self imposed prison is worth more than gold itself.

Halloween is on Friday this year. You have a couple days before that, the actual day, and the weekend after. You could go out a couple of times this year. The worse that could happen is you find out that You actually prefer to be a in the house dresser, or it may be that gentle push, another baby step, you need to go out more any time that You feel like going out.

I am not going to lie to you, once you've been out, You will want to go out again. There's no doubt about that. I wait, myself, for this season to come along every year. Hopefully at some point I will stop waiting but until that day comes, I look forward to this season. If your like me, or this is your first time thinking about it, DO IT. You'll regret it come November 3rd when it's too late to have an "excuse" for being out just because you listened to those that are beyond where we are with our dressing.

Food for thought

[Sara Jessica]

I wouldn't rain on anyone's parade. Halloween is the perfect time for many in our community to step out for the first time. I'd be lying if I were to say my first steps into this wonderful world of ours weren't on Halloween, specifically three years in a row back in my college years. But I'd also be remiss if I didn't point out that for me, personally, Halloween has long since ceased to have any luster when it comes to my feminine expression.

Just because for me it is "been there, done that" doesn't take anything away from the opportunity it creates for many first-timers out there, not to mention that there are plenty of us who still love the holiday despite having a significant feminine presence in the real world.

I hope everyone enjoys what Halloween means to them and Joanne, you are so right. Halloween may very well be a gateway drug to bigger and better things!!!

[Isabella Ross]

Joanne, mission accomplished. You've got me thinking of the possibilities...

[robyn_cd]

That's why I love Halloween as I dress fully and venture out and I don't have to worry about who's looking at me.

I get a girlfriend to help with my makeup if I need it and when I'm all glamorous we both go out on the town.

[Teresa Monsivais]

I agree with Sammy, For me its now dressing up in those sexy outfits or becoming the female super hero in tight fitted clothing. Thats what Halloween is for me. It s no longer just to dress up as a woman since I ca do that anytime and go out anytime. I know for some that's not the case. But Halloween is the time to do it. So I say go for it, you're going to love the experience. I remember the first time I did it wasn't all that but when I finally did it right (wig, makeup heels, panties, etc) I had so much fun!

[~Joanne~]

Uh, yeah, there are, but most people here prefer to ignore/forget about them, because it doesn't fit with how they want to believe the world feels about us. The pink fog here is thick indeed.

I agree, the fog can get pretty think at times, but I have yet, in the two years that I have been here, read one true horror story about being outed, or any overly bad experiences on Halloween. The only thing I can find is what a great time a sister had because she finally got a taste of being out. If Anyone does have that horror story (except Alice Torn, cause she always has a horror story lol) please feel free to post it.

whether you want to believe it or not, any 'normal' guy who chooses to go through the trouble to shave, pluck, coif, wear high heels, etc., will automatically be suspect of being gay/TS.

Or maybe they wanted to go "all out" for the "costume". Let me give you an example, for years I did Michael Myers, it was important to Me (even if no one noticed) to make sure the mask, the overalls, and the knife, completely matched to one of the Movies that I wanted the look to be from,

Yes, it seems a bit much but I wanted to to be 100% authentic. So if one chose to be a woman, or present as one, and cared about how it truly looked, why wouldn't you go all out? If anyone asks, which most won't, you've always wanted to try this costume and why not do it right?

When I was young, Many of my friends that couldn't afford a "real" costume, often dressed as a girl and the girls did the opposite. Who's to say that later in life you didn't decide to give it a shot? buying a pair of heels and a dress are A LOT cheaper than buying a costume. The Wig could be your SO's...the list goes on and on....and who wears a coif ever? and on Halloween, who's suppose to be "normal"?

Because from the rest of the world's point of view, why would we go through all that trouble when there are lots of costumes that might attract women instead of make them question our sexuality?

Well I guess if your out looking for a date, then being dressed might not work all that well but I guess that depends on how bold your feeling on that night. This wasn't about finding dates and such though, this is about sister's who haven't been pass that door way, taking advantage of the one night that most people won't question your "costume" choice.

Maybe I can get past that door this year........

Trust Me, you can. This is the one night of the year where most people won't question it. I am not saying you even need to go to a party, club, bar,or mall. These are places you can go when your more comfortable with your own skin. It's just about getting past that door. You could go during the day to a park or some where that doesn't have many people and just walk around or take pictures. You don't have to have ANY specific place to actually go.

none of us are restricted to just Halloween. I know of one event that has been published showing many CD's and usually the reactions are positive. If caught by someone you knew, you can always do the "I did it on a dare." excuse.

You are correct BUT for a starting point, for that first step outside into the real world, is there a better day than Halloween? No, there isn't.

I'm not trying to push sister's out the door with this post, I am just wanting to make sure that they know that Halloween isn't CD taboo as some of the sister's here try to make it out to be, year in and year out. Yes, every time you do go out that door there is a chance your going to be outed but the chances are a whole lot slimmer on Halloween.

The one part I totally disagree on is the "I was dared" part. That excuse is worst than "I lost a bet". Even if it was true and we went back to Sometimes_miss's post, would you go all out for a dare/bet (shave, pluck, and all of that) or a Halloween costume? You'd surly be outed with that excuse. Matter of fact, we should make a sticky post listing all the lame excuses that will (possibly) get you outed real fast.

So you could say that Halloween was the gateway drug, but I don't see it that way, rather it was an available opportunity to begin to let the girl emerge, and come out she did. We both still love Halloween and far from discouraging, would highly recommend the outing to anyone still in the closet. A safe chance to get your feet (heels!) wet, a chance to see whether you really do like this, a fun evening even if it never goes anywhere. Go for it!

Great story Jackie This is what this post is about, getting those heels clicking on the pavement (or whatever you chose to wear) on the one night when it should be fun and the experience that you may not have had otherwise. Every Halloween you have a couple days before hand, the actual day of, and (this year) possibly a couple days after....why miss that opportunity because some posts that You shouldn't do it on Halloween just because They don't.

I'll give my sister's this, if you are still afraid of just doing your every day (or chance) look then by all means there are plenty of sexy costumes out there that You could do also. Hell, the costume will lower the chances of being outed even a little more.


Halloween is the time to do it. So I say go for it, you're going to love the experience. I remember the first time I did it wasn't all that but when I finally did it right (wig, makeup heels, panties, etc) I had so much fun!

Exactly. Part of the problem with the nay sayers is that they themselves started out on Halloween. I am sure they just didn't get dressed and run out the door on say, March 3rd, one day and have been out ever since. No, they worried about the things that most of us closeted dressers are still worrying about.

I am so proud and happy for them that they got past that, that they accepted themselves for who they are and every day can be halloween (in spirit, because most of us don't see this as a costume) but there are those of us who still only have the one day for whatever reasons we have.

[heatherdress]

This is also a great time to openly shop for shoes and clothes and makeup.

Openly shopping is as much fun as dressing for Halloween.

[Launa]

Halloween is the prefect FREE PASS for all closeted folks to come out of the tree. Every year I go out it is in the most outrageous female costume! This year I'm going out as a glammed up evil witch. I've got my massive headdress, beehive hairdo, long formal gown and a massive homemade broomstick. I will be out at a big party.

I do want to say that you will never get caught by anyone you know, you can always say, "never say never" but the chances of winning the powerball lottery are much better.

[CarlaWestin]

This year, I'm really feeling the attraction of Halloween. I really, really want to go to Freemont St. this year wearing the sexey maid dress from my profile picture and full MAC makeover. I want to hear comments and compliments and "OMG!, you're a guy?" I might just offer up to my wife that I want a choice of this or staying home and handing out candy as a sexey maid. Like Rader did one year. I'm getting older and Halloween is just the perfect honest enabler event for a crossdresser. Now then, which maid's dress. Authentic pink housekeeper? Skinny sexey? Or the new tight one that fits my largest boobies?

[Angie G]

I've been of on 3 halloween And foved it. If any of us girls are thinking of doing if I say go for it. Just be safe about it.
Angie

[Stephanie47]

I am an in-home cross dresser. Years ago I decided to put my toe in the water on Halloween. I had been out for a drive en femme, and, on occasion I did get out of my car and stroll through a very 'secure' residential neighborhood. But, the two forays on Halloween were with the intent of actually forcing encounters with people. I was a lot younger and I felt, as I still do, that younger cross dressers' antics on Halloween are viewed differently than with oldsters, such as I at my current age.

On one occasion I went into a Winchell's Donuts House and bought donuts. I received compliments from the cashier on my presentation. The second time I went into a Safeway and bought a bottle of soda. I encountered another shopper, a young male, had a good laugh at a male in a dress. I guess he had not figured out it was Halloween.
Did I enjoy the experience? I found forcing an interaction was overrated. However, I will concur the feeling of the cool fall breeze caressing my legs was exhilarating, especially when the breeze was strong enough to cause me to grasp my skirt of my dress and slip so they would not whip through the air, a mannerism I've seen many natural females do in the wind.

All in all I would encourage an outing on Halloween, even if there is no intended destination, no party. Of course, if you're accompanied by your wife who is costumed, then there is a greater prospect for interaction, a visit to a restaurant, a movie date, etc. A lone guy, especially an oldster, may be viewed exactly for what it is: a cross dresser taking advantage of the date on the calender.

I live in a small city (200,000) with many secure residential neighborhoods. When I have the opportunity in the evening (8-9 PM) I do take strolls in the cool air. I love it. I especially love the evenings that are rainy because there are less people on the streets and an umbrella is ideal for obscuring my male face. I manufacture tasks to accomplish; return books to the library or mail a letter at the post office drop box. Once you have made the first trip out the door at a bare minimum the trip will satisfy that pent up desire to expand your horizons. You may decide, "Well, I did it!" and it's over. Or, "That was easy!" and do it some more.

My wife is taking a trip out of state in late December or early January. I'm looking forward to a cold night and having my legs massaged by "Jack Frost."

[~Joanne~]

I'd also be remiss if I didn't point out that for me, personally, Halloween has long since ceased to have any luster when it comes to my feminine expression.

and Joanne, you are so right. Halloween may very well be a gateway drug to bigger and better things!!!

I think that is what has happened with the seasoned dressers. It's lost it's appeal and rightfully so. I fully understand not having any desire to go dressed on halloween, femme or costume, but for some it's a chance to experience the feeling of truly being out, even if for just a few hours, 15 minutes, or whatever time they spend out and I just don't want them to miss the opportunity because someone told them the world knows your a CD because your out on Halloween.

If some one says "OMG, it's a guy dressed as a woman", you say "OMG, it's halloween" it's a better excuse than having a list with bra and panties sizes when out shopping for your things at least Halloween is more believable.

If any sister has had this unending desire to kill curiosity, this is it. There is no other time of the year that you can take advantage of and yes, this could be the baby step to more sister's being out there.

I might just offer up to my wife that I want a choice of this or staying home and handing out candy as a sexey maid.

I'm not going to lie to you Carla, I think people would find it "creepier" to see a guy dressed handing out candy to kids than if they encountered You on the streets or at a party but by no means am I saying You shouldn't. Celebrate the holiday any way you see fit because just like there is no right or wrong way to dress, there is no right or wrong way to enjoy halloween


All in all I would encourage an outing on Halloween, even if there is no intended destination, no party.

My SO and I enjoy just going to a metro park and doing some pictures. The parks are pretty empty this time of year and your out there! Plus natural light made some of the best pictures I have ever taken! Last year I only had time for one trip out but this year I am actually hoping for a few and a few different places I may not normally go, especially dressed.

Of course, if you're accompanied by your wife who is costumed, then there is a greater prospect for interaction,

Closeted dressers probably wouldn't be out with their SO's unless the "closeted" includes only her knowing. With that said, it is a great Idea. Dress the wife as a pimp and get your highest heels out and your shortest skirt and get out there

[Greenie]

I am going to rain, but in another way. There are very few dressers who are not (I guess I am excluding trans or those on hormones) That I have seen that are convincing enough that if I saw them on Halloween I would think, OMG THEY MUST DO THIS ALL YEAR!?

Most CD presentations are elaborate and over the top, which is how I can spot them from a mile away in the grocery store. If you worry is being "outed", I don't think that has much weight.

So go out! Have fun! Don't worry that you will be spotted and everyone will know! Thats silly, its halloween.

And if you are a guy dressing as a girl on halloween, people will make their own assumptions either way. Unless you are trying to deliberately be FUNNY, people will wonder why they chose to be a "normal" girl. So who gives a crap. Just do it!

[Sarah L]

A lady friend of mine saw me dressed as a girl for Halloween once and I told her about a couple of other Halloween outings. When I finally told her about Sarah, she had no idea that I was a crossdresser. In fact, the day I told her, I was completely dressed a few months from Halloween. She thought I was joking then. She was completely surprised.

There is no easy answer as to who will suspect and who will not.

I have been going out regularly the last couple of years, but I still look forward to Halloween. The pressure is off that day. I don't have to get my makeup perfect. I don't have to worry about my voice. I can be a "guy in a skirt" if that's how it turns out.

That first halloween outting is an amazing experience for most of us. It's something you will never forget. I recommend to anyone who hasn't gotten out, yet.

If you decide to do it, you'll have a blast!

[~Joanne~]

You call it " raining on the parade," but it's a reality check.

My original post (#1) is about not going out on Halloween at all. Dressed on Halloween will not get you outed. Doing stupid things, like going to an office party year after year dressed would most certainly send up a bunch of red flags and certainly get you outed in time.

My post is about those who believe that Halloween is a bad day to dress as if some unwritten CD code states that if you take your dressing seriously then you do not go out on that day and that is rubbish.

For sister's that do not go past the front door (back door or out a window even) Halloween is the perfect day to get in a experience that they may not other wise have and the day shouldn't be missed by others trying to convince them otherwise. You need not have a destination at all, a simple long drive, a park, or whatever as long as your smart and safe, feeling the wind through your hair, around your legs and the click of your heels on actually pavement is worth it and a really good baby step.

Most CD presentations are elaborate and over the top, which is how I can spot them from a mile away in the grocery store. If you worry is being "outed", I don't think that has much weight.

I agree, most girls that are in the closet do tend to go heavier on the makeup and such and do present an "over the top" look but that is due to not having anyone help them bring a real look together. I have been very fortunate as My SO will tell me when something doesn't look right or my makeup is too heavy, and you should have seen how bad it was lol

Even though the make up may be too heavy, the skirt too short or the heels being too high, it is still perfect for halloween

That first halloween outting is an amazing experience for most of us. It's something you will never forget. I recommend to anyone who hasn't gotten out, yet.

and this is what this whole thread is about. Forget unwritten rules and just have a good time the one day of the year that You can take advantage of.

One other thing I want to add to this that I probably should have put in my original thread, You don't actually have to pass the door way dressed. If You can't get past the neighbor's, pack a bag with your things, wear what you can under your drab clothes, and go to a busy parking lot and change there. Just don't do it in a front parking space. go to the back.Just make sure you pack your makeup remover and anything else you may need for the return trip home.

DO NOT change in a dark, out of the way spot. You'll draw unwanted police attention. I know, been there, done that lol

[Dana L]

Halloween is defiantly the gateway for many of us. My first time out as Dana was on halloween a few years ago. Found out I really like being out. Still my wife prefers me not to go out and my own fears are a factor too. Because of halloween though I have done some small steps, like going for a drive dressed, or walk my dog late at night, I even got gas fully dressed (paid at the pump of course). Next step, the drive thru. Enough baby steps and maybe I'll be comfortable with going out dressed often, but if that day comes I won't look down on those using halloween as their chance to go out, I'll remember when I was that way and encourage and reassure them. Till then I'll just keep putting one heel in front of the other.

[Tracy Hazel Lee]

I completely agree... Halloween IS the 'gateway' to breaking out. And will almost certainly chip away at the fear that one conjures up over leaving the safety of their home. It was my first ever outing, and yes, the taste of it is not something that is easily forgotten, but not impossible. If enough time passes between getting out, those little inhibitions that you experienced before your first ever outing, start to creep up and accumulate again. This is exactly what happened to me. I could remember having fun going out with friends many years ago (about 7 or 8). But lost a lot of the desire to leave my house over the years. Mostly because I didn't want to go out alone.

I just recently was able to get out again, with some friends I actually never expected to see again, and it was straight over the top for me. I really did forget how much fun it was. And because so much time had passed in between, the desire to get out again is stronger than I have ever felt it in the past. But for myself, the real kick in the pants I needed to push through the fear, was to be with friends. This may not always be possible with Halloween, but for other outings where Halloween is not your excuse, even just having 1 other CD friend go out with you, makes a world of difference in comfort level.

But getting back to Halloween, if you have a desire to do it, then go for it. It's the best excuse to dress. I would also agree, don't half-ass it. Go all out, you will enjoy the experience far more. All the times I have ever done it on Halloween, the majority of the people attending the party were all direct friends of mine, that have known me for many years. Most of them, since high school. I blew their minds last year, and NONE of them suspected anything. Or at least, never said anything to me that would imply that someone had figured me out. I plan on doing it again this year. Now, I would be surprised if nobody starts prying around this time though. Two years in row? And I'm even going to try and kick it up a notch. Blow their minds again. As I mentioned, this group of people have been my friends for a LONG time. I really don't believe that if I decided to reveal that this is more than just a Halloween costume, anyone would suddenly dis-own me or treat me badly. I am going to attend the party with the distant possibility that somebody may ask the 'right' questions, and I'm not going to lie about it. I'm actually at a point in my life and with my dressing now, that I almost don't care if my friends know anymore. The only fear I have attached to this, is truly not knowing the outcome. But for Halloween, I'm willing to take that risk. It's just too much fun to pass up.

[Marcelle]

Hi Joanne,

Well said. I have only been here for just over a year and I remember the "rain makers" from last October. Now in fairness many were trying to express that if you choose to go all out femme and do too good a job you may accidently out yourself and that is probably good advice to give and take note of. However if you have a good background story to explain your expertise (e.g., been practicing for months, had a GG friend help with make-up) you should come out unscathed. But those who get a bit shall we say "overzealous" with the mantra that being a woman is not a costume but a way of life, all I can say is "relax a bit". It think most here understand that and nobody is trying to denigrate women by saying I am going out dressed as a woman for Halloween. Indeed if you are going to take that stance then the same could be said about any of us who go out dressed "en femme" in the Vanilla world. Some can and will go out and some won't . . . so please give those who can't this one time of the year to enjoy what many of us take for granted.

I say enjoy Halloween to the best of your ability. If you choose to be a Zombie Girl then enjoy and if you choose to be as authentic a woman as possible . . . well . . . enjoy.

Hugs

Isha

[Maria 60]

No rain from this girl on any parade. Since on this site Maria is more complete and with the help of everyone here and of course my wife, I am much more confident now and the last three years Ive gone out and cant wait. I hope we all have a safe and fun Halloween.

[Adriana Moretti]

I couldnt agree more and recently did a fluffy article on this exact subject....now is the time if you havent been out before. It's the one day ......I hope some of you first timers get out there and good luck.

[JayeLefaye]

In the day-to-day world, I'll sometimes go out as a Dude in a Dress, and sometimes Dressed to Pass(except on close inspection). But on Halloween??? It's all out-outrageous! Marilyn, Elvira, a Playboy Bunny...And I don't even have parties to go to. I just hit the road and make as many stops around town in different stores as I can, buying little "party" items(I once came home with 6 bottles of wine...And I don't even drink!) as IF I were going to a party.

So, for the 1st timers(or the closeted), raid your closet and then get your cute little fannies out the door and enjoy!!!!

Jaye

[Ilsa]

Never was I more excited or relieved when I went to my first Halloween party. After much consternation I just did it! These were my true friends and if they didn't accept the way I looked then I knew they really weren't as close to me as I thought. Much to my relief they were astonished at how good I looked and this made me happy. Caring how you look is very important on Halloween; I say this because also at the party was a guy in a sheer nightie who was also wearing a shower cap on his head and was unshaven with no attempt to make himself more presentable. When I saw him I was relieved that I was not the only one at the party dressed, though I could hardly say he was, but I was also perturbed because it seemed disrespectful to those of us who care about their appearance when they dress.

So I guess what I'm saying about a Halloween adventure is do it right! You'll feel better and more confident and you won't be like those who exaggerate their appearance to make it look like a Halloween prank in order to cover up their insecurity.

As always,

Ilsa

[Beverley Sims]

I don'tknow about closeted but I am looking to have a good time this Halloween.
Just don't know where yet.

[sometimes_miss]

. There are no lynchings, hangings, or overly bad experiences.

Uh, yeah, there are, but most people here prefer to ignore/forget about them, because it doesn't fit with how they want to believe the world feels about us. The pink fog here is thick indeed. Remember too, that a Halloween costume is something we actively choose. And whether you want to believe it or not, any 'normal' guy who chooses to go through the trouble to shave, pluck, coif, wear high heels, etc., will automatically be suspect of being gay/TS. Because from the rest of the world's point of view, why would we go through all that trouble when there are lots of costumes that might attract women instead of make them question our sexuality?

[Erica Marie]

The rainers always find something bad in everything. I by no means am seasoned on being out, but one thing halloween can do is allow even the seasoned dresser to have some fun. I myself prefer a discreet, soccer mom look. I have a hard time clubbing because I dont fit in, just not my style of dressing. BUT halloween opens a whole new door. A door that allows anyone to loosen up. Even a soccer mom has a wild side and needs an excuse to express it.