Another nice affirmation and one of love

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

I just had a nice conversation with an old classmate from the 1960's who is also a Facebook friend now and she lives over a thousand miles from me. She has shared with me how she was bullied in school by a few nasty "pretty girls" and felt so down because she didn't "fit." She remembered me well. I told her how I was called a sissiy and other things because I really liked playing with the girls in things like jumprope and hated sports. She remembered and felt for me.

She also said that had she known how I felt about myself, I could have been part of her circle, you know, the girls that never get asked to dance at school dance night. She also said that she saw in me a quality that almost screamed, "Make me into a girl!" Her friends also saw it.

I'm in some tears right now wishing I had known. What a wonderful friend she is today!

Cheryl

[MissTee]

That is a nice sentiment. Sounds like you've made friends with a truly special person.

[Beverley Sims]

Cheryl,
Even after all these years it is a wonderful feeling to bond with someone from your past.
Cry those tears of happiness and make up for the lost time.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

I feel very blessed to have besides my wife several women who know me, love me, accept me, and encourage me. Just now I counted up twelve very awesome girl friends after I got to thinking who knows. It's so nice that I can talk freely with them. One is the wife of a friend who transitioned 7 years ago. None of my male friends know and I'm keeping it that way. But for me and for anyone else who might want to tell their girl friends, the feeling is great! If you do tell, just be sure you can trust who you tell. Maybe some have shared my "secret" but I don't really care and there have been no repercussions. Even if I was confronted somehow, I'd just own it and let them deal with it. If they reject me somehow, are they really friends you want to have?

Cheryl

[NV Susan]

WOW, that would of made school so much fun....just think of the possibilities....

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Cheryl, That's a case of, If only I would've known then what I know now!

That is a wonderful story, I was bullied in Jr. High School it sure wasn't any fun.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

Oh I can imagine the possibilities! But this was the 1960's when bullying and being labelled "queer" or something else was the norm. Everyone lived up to stereotypical behavior for their gender or else it was helll to pay. Had anyone known I might be dressing and hanging out with the girls I'd be screwed for life. I remember the talk about a classmate with a rumor he plucked his eyebrows. He just quietly kept to himself.

I'm happy that today there is a greater awareness in schools and teen social circles about the effects of bullying and an acceptance of gender variation. I've said before that were I a teen approaching puberty today that I would rebel and probably take whatever steps necessary. Parents of teens today are generally in their 30's and 40's and far more enlightened.

The bullying and name calling actually lowered my self esteem and made me withdraw into myself and avoid typical social situations. Of course I felt like I didn't fit in anywhere. I told my friend about all those feelings the other day. She told me I could talk freely and so I did. She had a physical condition and took a lot of crap. Her parents couldn't afford the medical help to correct it for her. She was crying too. I told her that I also heard some guys call her names and could see she was hurt and often quiet on the bus home. We never connected then. I wish we had.

For any very young members here reading this, or those who grew up in understanding and accepting environments, please be grateful. Your fears of paranoia, secretly being yourself, and ending up with lifelong psychological issues I think would not be so bad as it was for too many of us who have found solace here.

Cheryl

[jaleecd]

In the 50's being small and not in the popular group, made one an easy target for bullys. I borrowed Moms slips for the feel of silk or satin against my kin. No thoughts of being a girl, but thought of Christine Jorgenson transition was strangely exciting to me. Reputation of family members, especially if they were mentally slow, also made you a target for ridicule and exclusion. manual arts like auto shop and metal shop were havens for us.