Dealing with the urges !Any thoughts please ?

[ophelia]

I do like shopping, especially thrift shopping. But in several areas of my life, my male wardrobe, the equipment for my work, and indeed my crossdressing garb...I am well stocked and really do not need anything new. Thrift shopping is an adventure and when you do buy something, new or not, it's a bargain, but that's the key for me.
Here's the mantra: It's not a bargain if you truly don't need it or can't fix it.
I come from a family of kleptomaniacs so now it is a point of pride when I turn down something which doesn't fit the mantra.
So yesterday at Value Village turning away from those perfect size 11W three inch platforms with the red soles.....
VICTORY!

Of course I tried them on with a few turns in the dressing room!

[Jammee]

Being married for a very long time, have found by grace just another reason to have married my wife. She encourages the shopping and is in the car waiting



A

[Michelle colson]

I'm guilty of too much shopping too, both in person and online. I tend to window shop mostly but sometimes I can't help myself and end up buying yet another dress or pair of shoes or whatever. My wife loves to shop and try on clothes so I kind of live vicariously through her sometimes. Once and a while I'll see something cute shopping with her and go back alone and get it for myself. As to the why or a remedy I have no suggestions.

[Sarah Louise]

Earlier this week, I had my first dressing up session for years. I now own one dress and one set of underwear. In guy mode, I only look at clothes if I know I need something in particular. However, since re-unleashing the girl in me, I'm amazed how I've suddenly become obsessed with searching online for new outfits. I've just ordered two new pairs of stockings even though I already have five - but hey, they're in a different shade and lower denier. I think I finally understand why my wife's favourite pastime is buying new clothes. She's got a massive wardrobe, but being petite, it's just a shame none of it fits me! Lol.

[Vanessa5]

I have major urges to shop as well. Mine are usually tied to me being down. I think I enjoy the looking for seperates to make an outfit. I tend to buy more than i need,but I am getting better at controling the urdge. And as a bonus I do have lots of clothes!

[sometimes_miss]

Sorry for the short hijack, but Martina! If your 38!!! year old son is back living with you, and thinks you're a freak, throw the SOB unceremoniously out of the house to go live on his own.

I used to preach the same thing. I know lots of parents who's adult children wind up coming back to 'the nest'. And I wondered why people put up with it. Until......someone told me. She wondered if she had failed as a parent, not teaching her kid what he needed to know, to survive on his own. She thought that she had done her best, given her child everything she herself didn't have, and couldn't understand why her son turned out to be incapable of finishing school, of holding down a job for longer than a few months, of prioritizing monetary expenditures. Her son was a failure, and she felt so guilty, she didn't have the heart to kick him out, because she felt responsible for his failure and didn't know how to get him to understand that he needed to be responsible for himself.

[Sarina Curtis]

Would it be fair to say you're married to your wife because you found her, and her fashion sense, attractive? If you see her with something on that looks good to you, it seems pretty logical that it's something you'd want for yourself too. On a just completed trip to the States my wife hit the Victoria's Secret shops pretty hard and I had to fight off jealous feelings as I helped her pick things out which I also thought would look great on me (and there were some panties in there I would have killed for!). Being DADT makes things I challenge I bet, but it would likely be good to let your wife in on your purchases before she stumbles on to them which should help minimize the anger that could follow. As for wanting the same pair of wedges that she bought, I know my wife would be rather ticked off if I was literally in the same shoes as her. even just letting her know you're making a purchase, not so much what you intend to buy, and how much you're looking to spend could help ease some of the tension.

I love the shopping side of things too, fortunately I have limited storage space which helps me keep my spending within acceptable limits!!

[jennifer easton]

Teresa the joys of retail therapy has rescued me from depression more than once, like you the need to buy things I will probably never get to wear out sometimes is overwhelming it all gos back to the fact that deep down we are female and the need to stay in Vogue is part of are basic instinct we cant help ourselves. xoxoxox Jenni

[Nikki.Kontos]

I'm finding now that I am getting into it more that I am getting the urge to browse more, both online and instore, although at the moment I don't lead on that it's for me lol

[Mollyanne]

From what you describe and how you described it I would say that you want to be accepted but feel guilty because of how you do it. I'm sure you know that your "hidden items" will be discovered one day and you will have to answer all those questions about "why". I, myself have accepted who I am not as to why the way I am. I am just wired a bit differently. Just a little bit of guilt can turn into a much bigger issue when not addressed.

Molly