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Thread: Sharing apt with a girl. Is it a good idea?

  1. #26
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    Aug 2007
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    I have to agree with a lot of the comments above. This sounds like a potential dream come true, but could also be a nightmare come true. Make sure your expectations are realistic. I can see this much better if you knew the roommate at least somewhat prior to moving in. I would not get too aggressive with the dressing at first (by that I mean asking to use some of her clothes, asking for makeup help or to borrow things, etc). If she warms up to all this, she may start getting more involved with it, but don't push it all on her. Some of those replies may have taken you as you presented that you were looking for a roommate and is the dressing okay with them, rather than looking for a coach and tutor who is intimately involved with all this. Another concern I would have is that these are by definition most likely single women and they will likely be bringing dates home from time to time, sometimes unannounced. How are those guys going to respond to all this? I know how it should be, but reality could be rather uncomfortable.

  2. #27
    If only you could see me sarahcsc's Avatar
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    Dec 2011
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    917
    To share an apartment with a girl is probably just as risky as a guy. In fact, I'd say the safest place is a place without humans.

    You just need to be open minded, realistic, and test the waters. But most of all, expect the best, but prepare for the worst.

    Play it by ear and always draw your boundaries so you know where you stand.

    You can blur the boundaries a bit later when you are closer with them.

    Love,
    Sarah
    "The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me" - Ayn Rand

  3. #28
    Member Andrea Chenowith's Avatar
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    Mar 2014
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    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    Anyone that would pick a room mate sight unseen is asking for BIG TROUBLE in my experience.

    That goes for both u AND them!
    YES!

    I was in a similar situation in 2004, when I took an internship in the DC area. I originally made an online connection (through a message board on a shared interest, not on CL) that seemed awesome. I had a bedroom and bathroom all to myself, and we shared kitchen space but I had my own refrigerator/freezer. The first month (January), it was okay, because I spent a lot of time leaving early and staying late because of the workload in the office and trying to both familiarize myself with the team I was working for and make a dent in the media guide that we were producing. However, by the end of February, I was looking for a new apartment, because I was never able to USE the kitchen space because the homeowners never cleaned up. One day I could smell the filth from the kitchen when I stepped in the front door.

    And my second roommate experience in DC is a cautionary tale in keeping your expectations in check. I roomed with a girl I knew (and had extreme interest in as a relationship - or just sex - partner) from school, only to find that her interests swung outside of what I could provide. (Mostly lesbian, but sprinkled with a bit of daddy issues.)

    But I did like her taste in underwear. (She dropped a pair while folding them in the living room, and I couldn't resist trying them on. Still have them to this day..)

  4. #29
    Silver Member Annaliese's Avatar
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    Feb 2006
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    In Cedar City Utah
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    Why not, there fine with it, you will be just one of the girl, plus they will feel safer with you being your self, this is a win win for everyone. Be classes about it, it may start out as amusing or curiosity but could turn into a good friend, the other option is to get male room mate and have to hide your self

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