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Thread: Keeping it in the family?

  1. #1
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    Keeping it in the family?

    I have read about several individuals coming out to their daughters, but rarely to their sons. I have read about some saying that they think that their son may be a CD'er also, but they don't seem to broach the subject with them. I read this many years ago, it said that men who are CD'ers often raise there sons to be CD'ers also, yet I have not seen any evidence on any CD site to support this thought, which leads me to think where did this come from.
    So, here are the questions;
    1. Has anyone here been raised by their father, to be a CD'er?
    2. As in the first question, been raised by their mother to be a CD'er?
    3. Has anyone raised their son to follow in their foot steps and be a CD'er also?
    I know in my own case, I don't fit the mold that I have seen in other's stories. I have read about getting introduced to CDing by an older sister for whatever reason, but these questions are aimed at our parents, not siblings. So, is there anyone who was introduced to this life style by their parants?
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  2. #2
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    No to all of three.

  3. #3
    New Member fran_c's Avatar
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    no.1 No
    no.2 ? my mom used to suggest girls outfit for Halloween, i always refused (what a dope i was)
    no.3 No

  4. #4
    New Member catherine56's Avatar
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    No to all

  5. #5
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    I was raised by my mother, but not to be a CD'r. I was caught several times by her (a few on purpose). I suppose I did so, because I had heard her say she always wanted another girl after my sister passed away ( i was already wearing sis's clothes before then. yes, sis knew and had fun with her little sister on occasion)
    Mom let me sleep in a nightgown (sis's)after my brothers left home and told me to stay out of her makeup as Dad almost caught me in lipstick once. She told me i could dress up but couldn't leave the house and had to be a boy again before 430 pm.
    I didn't find out until years later that the doctors thought that Mom was carrying twins a boy and a girl. Mom always tried to tell me later that my dressing was her fault because she wanted another girl so badly while carrying me back in the 56-57 winter. Many years later after coming to grips with who I am I told her that NO ONE knows why we dress, but we have to come to accept who we are and enjoy it.

  6. #6
    Laura So Cal Laura28's Avatar
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    No to all three didn't have a dad going up. I suspect my mom new and just ignored it. I do think she wouldn't have had an issue with it.

  7. #7
    Member SandraInHose's Avatar
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    No to all three, but...

    My mom gave me a pair of tights to sleep in during the winter months back when I was a small child...maybe 6 or 7. Obviously I had no sexual connection at that age, so she never considered those tights as encouraging crossdressing, especially as it was virtually unheard of back in the late 60's.

    She did however find my stash of pantyhose when I was a senior in high school, but other than asking me what they were for (and getting an evasive non-answer from me), she never mentioned them again. But I'm sure she knew exactly what they were being used for. To this day I have no idea if she ever told my dad.
    "Masquerading as a man with a reason, my charade is the event of the season" ('Carry On Wayward Son' by Kansas)

  8. #8
    Senior Member Lori Kurtz's Avatar
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    Being a crossdresser is a conflict-ridden thing. I can't believe that any parent would try to influence his or her child toward crossdressing--or, for that matter, toward any kind of non-standard kind of sexual identity or expression. I would hope that all parents would be accepting of whatever kind of sexuality their children grow into. I think the world is moving, however slowly, in that direction, and that's a wonderful thing. But in spite of the progress, life is easier for non-crossdressers than crossdressers. Nobody here is likely to deny that, right? Who would wish a burden on their children?
    Last edited by Lori Kurtz; 12-28-2014 at 09:39 AM.

  9. #9
    Girl from the Eagles Nest reb.femme's Avatar
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    Definitely not to all three!

    However, maybe my slip was showing at some point over the years, as one of my sons came out as gay some years ago.? Before anyone has a pop....that was only a joke!

    Rebecca
    Flying high under the spell of life!

    http://www.rebsweb.co.uk

  10. #10
    Kind of shy ;) Linda Leigh's Avatar
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    NO to all 3
    Sometimes I like to dress as Linda Leigh

    WARNING:Any institutions or individuals using this site or any of its associated sites for studies , projects or any other reasons You DO NOT have permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current and future. If you have or do, it will be considered a violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.

  11. #11
    Member Valerie Sparks's Avatar
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    I'm not sure if my mom caused me to be transgendered or was just open and encouraging to what she saw in me.

    I remember, though, that when I was very young (no more than three) that I didn't want to take naps. I remember that she let me wear a pair of her panties if I would sleep (and it worked). Then when I got to be 8 and 9 she helped me dress up as a girl for Halloween--I won a local contest in the female category one year. (I've posted that story here a while back.) As I got older she would occasionally hint as to whether I wanted to be a girl or dress as one, but by then I understood how that was unacceptable to many (including my good Catholic dad) so I hid things.

    My mom was the daughter and sister of physicians and quit college in 1950 to be a housewife. (Had she been born 20 years later I don't think she would have quit). So she was always interested in medical issues and I've always wondered if she noticed something in me as a child. Or if it was her desire for a daughter that made me the person I am today. Unfortunately, she died (aneurism) 33 years ago so I'll never know for sure.
    Last edited by Valerie Sparks; 12-26-2014 at 07:20 PM.

  12. #12
    Gold Member bridget thronton's Avatar
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    No to all three

  13. #13
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    No to all 3

  14. #14
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    No to all three here. Looking back there were things that may have been
    a girl sides precursors but not enough and certainly not by parents.

  15. #15
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    no,no and no. but years later i told my mom about my dressing up. this was after my father had passed. and i think she was lonley,and we would get dressed up . she showed me how to wear make up and how to fix wigs , we had a great time. i do miss her. hugs love lynda

  16. #16
    Amanda countrygirl's Avatar
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    No to all three. However in my family there was an aunt who pretended she was a boy. Makes me wonder who else is transgender/cross dresser in the family.
    Amanda

  17. #17
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    1. No.
    3. We don't have kids

    2. Hmmm. Certainly not raised by her to be a CD, but when I was 4 or 5 she opened Pandora's Box by letting me play dressup a few times. I guess that also opened the door to her closet. She wanted a daughter but didn't have one. She knew that I would get into her clothes, but never discussed it with me, and certainly would not have encouraged my CD'ing. I don't know how much of that affected my TG.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  18. #18
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    Hi Gillian, No No No
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

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  19. #19
    Member Sophie Yang's Avatar
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    Gillian,

    Both my sons know. Both have been out to CD events with my wife and I. One son and I go out together to coffee shops to work, did a little Christmas shopping together, and caught a movie last week. I told him that this was the first movie Sophie had ever seen and he reminded me that we had gone out with a group of CD and see the new Planet of the Apes movie this summer.

    No to all three of your questions.

    My wife and I raised our two boys pursue their own passions and idiosyncrasies not ours.

  20. #20
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    Gillian,
    The only thing my father raised me to be was to take verbal abuse and be put down !
    My mother may have known I was wearing women's clothes but never said anything !
    I would never influence or confuse anyone on gender issues, I've lived with the shame and guilt for too long to see others suffer !
    My CDing came out of my own mind with the the girl next door as my only possible influence !

  21. #21
    Curmudgeon Member donnalee's Avatar
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    I think my mom would have encouraged me; she liked buying me "fancy" clothing that was male, but a little girly (satin pajamas and a pink dinner jacket, for instance). My dad, while a very nice man, didn't want me acting that way. When I was about 10, a couple of kids started chasing me when I was going home. I was patient for a while, but they didn't go away, so I did something about it. I walked up to the nearest and asked him why he was chasing me; I forget what his reply was (undoubtedly something snotty), mine was to kick him right in the crotch. He went down, I turned to his friend and asked him did he want some too, he replied that he didn't and they both went off, one limping badly (these were prepubescent kids, so it didn't hurt nearly as much as it might have if they had been older). When my dad got home, he asked to talk to me privately and said he had gotten a call from one of the boy's father and told me to not ever do that again; apparently I had violated some male code of fair fighting. I didn't argue but feel to this day that I did the right thing; nobody ever tried that on me again and I had no further bother from the 2 kids.
    ALWAYS plan for the worst, then you can be pleasantly surprised if something else happens!

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  22. #22
    Senior Member UNDERDRESSER's Avatar
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    You could say my Mother indirectly encouraged me to be partial to female clothes. She caught me and my year younger sister trying each others clothes once. She didn't like that at all, lots of shouting. I think that gave it a "taboo" flavour to it, which made it more desirable. A few years later, I somehow forgot my swim trunks when going to the beach, Parents went off and brought back a new pair of "swimming trunks" Label was cut out. I think they were a pair of women's striped panties in xxs. There is somewhere a video of me coming out of the water trying to wave my Dad off with the camera while simultaneously trying to cover my genitals, because the white stripes had gone see-through. I was about 8 in the first incident, and maybe 12 in the second. I remember feeling embarrassed at the beach, but at the same time, somewhat thrilled, when I started to realise that they were girl's clothes.
    "Normal is what you get when you average out the weirdness that everybody has." Quote from my SO

    Normal is a setting on a washing machine, or another word for average.

    The fact that I wear a skirt as a male should not be taken as a comment on what you do, or do not wear, or how you wear it.

  23. #23
    Senior Member Read only Allison Chaynes's Avatar
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    No to all three, but my
    Mom has in recent years suggested places to buy pantyhose for a medical issue I occasionally have with my leg.

  24. #24
    Silver Member Maria 60's Avatar
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    Well I am beginning to learn about the son theory.My wife keeps accusing me of going into her dress closet, not that she cares that I wear her dresses, but she tells me the dresses are always hung messy and the dresses are caught in the closet door. I told her maybe its our son, but she doesn't want to hear it and believes it me, I may have an answer to one of your questions in a little while.

  25. #25
    Aspiring Member Leona's Avatar
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    I'm going to say no to all three, but with a caveat.

    One of my sons has a history of crossdressing, back when he was quite small, and he threw a fit in the store a few times when his mom took him clothes shopping and he wanted a dress.

    As a result of that, I have spoken to him about it (I'm out to my immediate family). He denied any interest in it, I pointed out the odds favored him being a CDer, and that obviously I would accept and love him whether or not he was a CDer.

    We left the conversation there, and he has presented himself as a cisgender heterosexual male pretty consistently. Naturally, I continue to respect that. It's up to him, at this point, if he wants/needs to talk about any issues he may have, but all the signs point to him not having issues like that.

    For point of reference, he's 14 now.

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