It is just over a year since I discovered and joined this extraordinary place - and it being generally a time of year to take stock and reflect on things, I found myself doing so over the past few days so I thought I’d share what a strangely progressive year it has been for me.
Let me say, for any newbies, you’ll find me using words like weird, strange, odd and similar, extensively. As much as this is a rooted part of me as with most here, I still find the whole ‘thing’ completely bizarre at times, but that shouldn’t be taken as meaning I think that we’re all weird (although some may be…) – just that I don’t understand the ‘why?’ of this, which is why I enjoy discussing it so much.
So – joining here a year ago, I posted an intro that was quite truthful (phew!) although I would have no idea how much my perspective of this community and condition would change and grow over time. I really enjoy the way we all interact and I love the diversity of views and quality of thought that (mostly!) goes into the dialogue – the diversity of people here makes this work as well and I have made some very splendid <virtual> friends, some of whom I one day hope to meet for real… It will happen…
Cut to the chase! I hear you… I didn’t want to ramble on (like usual) but I wanted to highlight a few observations that have meant a lot to me and I think are important to this community…
Firstly – the diversity of how, why, where and which way we do this weird thing! And I do believe all are valid; that we rightly sit as some sort of community even though we may appear fragmented at times, diversity is something to be treasured and celebrated. I do believe (just my opinion) that the same core drive motivates us all, but it’s interpreted or grows in different ways, is influenced by our environment or upbringing, and has the range and differing strength of expression that we see here (but perhaps is under-represented in general). I think it’s so important for this forum and community to be inclusive and proactive in ensuring that every type of crossdressing expression is represented and embraced. There’s strength in numbers, sisters…
I have learnt so much of other folk’s heart-rending stories of conflict, acceptance, transition, non-acceptance and more… I’ve said before I wanted to do more and I know that I must find a way to do that. Again, I believe it to be important that we do more than just go shopping, or socialising (fun as that may be) – but I know activism’s not for everyone – I just think it will be more important for us in the future.
For the newbies: there is some great advice here, but ALL of it should be treated with care. It is, after all, only opinion, and even collective opinion here is not anything definitive or guaranteed for quality. There is also – I believe – a very subtle pressure; undertone, almost – that relates to that typical ‘group norming’ thing, where there is a tendency to want to emulate the overall group opinion in order to ‘belong’. I think this can be positively dangerous or catastrophic for some, so all I would say is that everyone should be very clear about their personal motivations for wanting to change something, do something new, whatever that is in their life - because it is THEIR LIFE – and not rely solely on the views they find here.
As to my earlier point about endlessly discussing the ‘why?’ and ‘what types we are’ and other apparently academic views, I’d say this to everyone: In the western world we owe much of the freedom and inclusiveness of society to people who were prepared to vigorously discuss, debate and finally agree on the way our culture should be structured, and if we can help progress nothing more than someone’s understanding of what we’re all about as a community, including all the fragments and segments that make up our eclectic mix, then all the chat and banter will have been worth it.
To finish on a positive, I’ve had some great practical advice on fashion (I must post some earlier disasters soon in the Gallery… if I dare…), makeup, hair, styles.. I’ve learnt so much from so many people who have rarely been anything but supportive and kind. I’ve pushed my own practical bounds to getting my Katey side out into the real world, and enjoyed it – and will doubtless do more - and in doing that I’ve learned more about myself and more importantly, managed to get to a level of more self-acceptance which, for many of us guilt and angst-ridden folk, is probably the biggest achievement of all. I still think I’ve a lot more to learn, and I still think it’s totally nuts at times, but I have a much better chance of doing that in harmony and having a reasonable amount of enjoyment in doing so.
Thank you, Members of cd.com, for all that you do every day to help those that are willing to come here, talk, listen, learn and be self-accepting.
Katey x
things you post at times but it helps me grow myself and its part of that wisdom you share with us, i will say that it would be a honer to sit and have a martini with you and shoot the 
with you, so congrats on all you have accomplished this year and heres to learning and sharing for another 
cheers.....
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but truth is Katey you take a lot of pressure off me. 
thanks
)
