What's your personal why?

[Jaymees22]

The big WHY of crossdressing seems to have no definitive answer, like we're just wired that way or it just feels good, etc,etc..

The question I'm asking is why we keep doing it even though it can cause problems in our lives. Is it an addiction or a compulsion for you. I just know if I'm home alone I have to dress up. I really feel like I'm my true self when I'm dressed. I'm fascinated with the transformation when I look in the mirror. I also feel much happier, I always felt I was fairly well adjusted in my life and then when I started dressing I was overcome with relief, because I felt better than I had ever felt in my life and I'm pretty old.

So I've listed some of my personal whys, what are some of yours.

Hugs Jaymee

[Pat]

I've always held that any question that starts with "why" can't be answered. "Why does the ball fall to the ground?" We say "gravity" but gravity doesn't say why it does that -- it just describes HOW it does that.

Why do I dress? Each word in the question is a valid English word, each is properly arranged to form a sensible interrogatory sentence, but it's gibberish. It's like "Would you rather go to Boston or by bus?" I can tell you THAT I dress and, like you, I can list the good feelings that come from it. But why? There is no why, there's just the fact of it. You can bring up endorphins or DNA or socialization but none of that describes why, it just describes how.

[Taylor Ray]

In the past I would always put off the question of 'why' as irrelevant. Now, I sometimes try to answer questions just to see what happens, as part of my process.

I began wearing my mother's lingerie at a very young age. But it wasn't just sexual. I also began to put on "Halloween Wigs" and take pictures of myself. I wanted to "see what I looked like", not just in a mirror but in a tangible photograph.

Of course, this was all very forbidden, so I could never really just allow myself to present as female. Having to hide this side of myself no doubt distorted the original innocence involved. But I believe it was very innocent, much like a child who says "why can't I just wear these clothes and try to look pretty." It was the "adult world" that had already predetermined the binary gender roles of which I was supposed to conform.

So for me, the question isn't "why I prefer to wear women's cloths and be pretty".

It is: "Why are gender roles so strict and limiting in the world." The answer to that question turns it back upon the spectator, and forces them to acknowledge their narrow-mindedness and limited capacity for openness. It is much easier for them to judge me.

[Rachael Leigh]

Sometimes I think it is a compulsion but then like you once I'm dressed it's just me and I'm ok with that.
I now want to be more open and comfortable being in public but since there is way more to doing that IE family and the like I have to be happy dressing at home and sharing here

[mykell]

hi jaymee,
when my son was younger he could not compose sentences for projects and reports,
(im not much better myself) i told him to just answer these questions, who, where, what, when, why, and how.

who: me, i like girl clothes
where: at home but i long to go out lately
what: wear the things that make me feel like myself
when: whenever i have the desire to wear them
how: easy, buy what i like
why: because i want too....it makes me feel like me
sounds so simple but it gets so complicated, so like you i think im pretty well adjusted and capable, seems like a simple answer to a simple question but why does the real answer eludes us so.....

[Kate Simmons]

Well, they say the truth hurts, maybe this is one way the truth hurts us. Being one's real self in today's world is not for the faint of heart.

[JayeLefaye]

[QUOTE=Jaymees22;3680332

...even though it can cause problems in our lives....

Hugs Jaymee[/QUOTE]

Hi Jaymee, and hugs back at'cha!

Please forgive me for singling out what I think is the most relevant part of your question. The why of CDing isn't what we need to figure out(because none of us can).

The "problems in our lives" is the issue that needs to be addressed...Sort those "lives" problems out, and then deal with the CD question.

I guess that what I am trying to say, is that being a CD is not the real issue, because it is what we are..

Jaye

[Natasha V]

My personal why is why can't Society get over judging everyone lifestyle and just let everyone be happy.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Jaymee, It's just who I am and it's just what I do.

[Jaymees22]

I've always held that any question that starts with "why" can't be answered. "Why does the ball fall to the ground?" We say "gravity" but gravity doesn't say why it does that -- it just describes HOW it does that.

Maybe I should have said what are your personal reasons? Jaymee

[Kandi Robbins]

Only speaking for myself, I am hardwired. My first experience, at the age of 5, took any options away from me. From then on, it was just managing the big pink beast, now finally embracing it and enjoying the ride!

[CynthiaD]

Because when I get dressed en femme and look into the mirror, the person looking back at me is me! I don't know that other person I see from time to time.

[flatlander_48]

Why we do this offbeat activity in spite of the problems it causes (real and imagined) speaks to the degree of significance it has for us. If it had less significance for us, we either wouldn't do it or we would reserve it for Halloween once a year. Whatever condition dressing satisfies, it is never 100% satiated. There is always enough left over to get us to the Next Time...

DeeAnn

[Purple Puppy GG]

...I really feel like I'm my true self when I'm dressed. I'm fascinated with the transformation when I look in the mirror. I also feel much happier,...

Hugs Jaymee

[QUOTE=Jaymees22;3680332]The big WHY of crossdressing seems to have no definitive answer, like we're just wired that way or it just feels good, etc,etc..


Erika tells me the same that when she is dressed up it makes her happier. That she is true to herself.

[Tracii G]

I'm more of a blend of both genders so dressing 100% female isn't a huge stretch. 100% female clothing makes me feel more normal when I go out.
I just feel like me no matter which way I am dressed.

[DorothyElizabeth]

For several years after I discovered that I like wearing "women's" clothing, I wrestled with the whys and wherefores of me, life, and my proclivities. (Of course, my first question was, Am I gay?, but that quickly went away - I am definitely not attracted to men) Finally, I decided it's like religion - I can't explain it; it's just part of who I am. And, as I often say to people, "I lived through the nineties and found the woman in me - she's a lesbian."

[Christen]

I fall in to the "It's who I am and what I do" camp. I've never felt complete unless I can express the feminine part of me, and I express that as presenting as a female, as best I can.

Christen x

[Seana Summer]

I have not figured out why I indulge in Crossdressing. All I know is that I enjoy it and it makes me happy.

[DorothyElizabeth]

and I express that as presenting as a female, as best I can.

Christen x

If that is you in the avatar, I'd say you do that very well.

[justmetoo]

Why not?

(but a little more seriously, it's part of who I am. By that I mean, when I dress en femme I'm expressing an aspect of myself. Same as when I'm dressed in other ways I'm expressing other aspects of myself.)

[giuseppina]

Escapism. Totally unrealistic in the real world, but it works for me.

[Erika Lyne]

[QUOTE=Purple Puppy GG;3680570]

The big WHY of crossdressing seems to have no definitive answer, like we're just wired that way or it just feels good, etc,etc..


Erika tells me the same that when she is dressed up it makes her happier. That she is true to herself.

This is so true. My wife (Purple Puppy GG) has this part nailed. When I dress it is like there is an anger stripped from me. I feel like all the lies I tell everyone , myself included, are lifted. I feel like I am being true to the world and myself. Unfortunately, I still hide Erika from the world.

Hugs,
E!

[Pat]

E! I like that. I agree, the feeling is a lot like no longer having to lie. Good insight.

One of my other quirks is that I like to ride motorcycles. Motorcyclists get questioned all the time by non-riders asking why we choose to do such a dangerous thing. In the riding community we just say "If I have to explain it, you'll never understand." Crossdressing is like that too, except here we get asked by our peers why we do it and the answer gets turned around, "You already understand why I do it, I'll never be able to explain."

[Laceytosee]

I have never wondered "why". I have often wondered "why not". I would have enjoyed growing up and treated as a girl. I thought wearing skirts ane blouses would be the best! Now I do!! and of course the lingerie required for a complete outfit.

Lacey

[Princess Chantal]

Here is a bunch of answers to whys.

Why did I start? As a child I became curious of the appearance and softness that pantyhose had on legs in which led me to try on a pair once. The sensation from the experience created an attraction and became a fetish. I didn't wear them for several years after that, until a girlfriend dressed me up for Halloween when I was in my 20's. Wasn't that dressing up that triggered me into crossdressing though. It was seeing the pictures of the fun that was had by the local cd social group that struck the curiosity in me that got me wanting to socialize enfemme.

Why am I continuing on? Because I am really enjoying it in a hobby/interest manner and have such a passion of where I took my crossdressing to. Whoohoo fun in costumes! I still haven't experienced all the curiosities I had and am still gaining more wonderings.

Why do I believe that someday I would not be doing it? Health, lack of curiosity (experienced all of the curiosities I had "been there done that"), and/or just a loss of interest period!