How did you feel the 1st time you went out in public

[SusanaO]

The first time I went out in public? Or the first time I went out in public and was noticed?

When I was 21, I went with some friends for a weekend getaway to Ensenada, Mexico to celebrate a friend's birthday. Well, there was a problem with the hotel we had booked, and three of us were roomless. The other two were a couple, so they stayed at another (expensive) hotel with lots of vacancy. I was going to stay by myself, so I opted for a cottage by the beach as you enter the city (cheap, adequate, roomy for a single person). I had my car, so I didn't mind the 5 mile drive to the hotel and back. After hitting some clubs, around 3am or so we called it a night. I brought my things to sleep in femme, and somehow I packed a mini dress without realizing it. Then I remembered I had left a pair of heels in the trunk of my car - and being tipsy, of course I decided to dress up! I didnt have much on me, so all I put on was a little bit of cover up, mascara, eyeliner, lipstick, fixed my hair (long), and was walking around my cottage in my heels (good thing I had shaved my legs that morning!). Well, I guess it took a little longer for the last drinks I had to really hit me, so thanks to the alcohol I got the courage to go out for a walk where no one knew me (and my friends being 5 miles away). It was dark, no lighting other than the street lights, and hardly any cars drove by, though a few slowed down when approaching me. Honestly, I felt kind of "****ty" (if thats an appropriate word to use). I wish I was dressed classier and where there was more population. After a 15 minute walk (that's all I could take in heels then), I went back to my cottage and called it a night. Not sure of any of my neighbors saw me, but a few greeted me kindly in the morning. Anyway, that was my first time out in public. Lame.

The first time I went out in public and was actually noticed, it was 3 years later at a Halloween party. I dressed like a naughty school teacher, only my skirt was a little longer this time. I got good laughs from friends who weren't expecting to see me like that at all, and even a few compliments from women (e.g. I like your makeup! Who did it? Nice legs!). It was lots of fun, and I even had no problem getting my picture taken with strangers! Now I'm wishing to have more similar moments.

[Adriana Moretti]

I shared my first time....how about my SECOND first time ??...after a 7 year purge from dressing? You know...getting back on the bandwagon......

I decided to make my first trip out a big cd function ( why not right). It was one of Jennifer Bryants Raven Event's.

I arrived the day before the event to scope out the hotel, the club, the resturant, etcc..settled in and figured I would use the night before to brush up on my makeup skills.
I Got dressed, did my makeup, now i was sitting in my hotel room alone and bored, so i popped a bottle of wine....drank that and my mind started wandering off...I JUST traveled over 200 miles, and I'm crossdressed, ALONE, in a hotel room ! What was I doing?? Was I crazy? Have I gone too far?? Do I REALLY want this?? Did I go over the edge?? I undressed and tried to sleep, I couldnt...I just crawled in a ball and shivered all night.

In the morning, I thought about leaving...and coming up with an excuse as to why I missed the event ( I was meeting gals from CD.COM there) . But I decided to at LEAST check out the Meet & Greet and if I hated it I could always use my excuse then.

Showtime came and I drank up some liquid courage to help me get out the door (I wasnt driving,, the meet & greet was right downstairs in the hotel),

I left my hotel room, and was nervous.....sooooo nervous that when I met my friend Samantha she could see I was visually shaken right away....she grabbed me looked right in my eyes and said "Adriana..calm down...it's going to be ok"...and you know what from that moment on...it was !

It was nice to have a big sister like that , and she made me feel right at home.
I wound up staying the WHOLE weekend, even though I had a few blunders ( wig disasters, spilled, drinks, falling in my heels etc...but it WAS fun...and I went to the next, and the next, and the next.....

It was kinda like riding a bike....but it can be overwhelming at first....being alone in the hotel room with just my thoughts and a bottle of wine was prob not a good idea looking back.

[melyssadawn]

Big difference as I was only part dressed , male attire top half but black tights , skirt and low heels bottom half ( though TBH wore jogging bottoms from house to car .Remember vividly the exhilaration of driving like that , seeing the light changing the colour of my tights , the feel of my heels on the car pedals......how do GG's drive in heels lol. Never done it since but the desires still there only next time it'll be fully femme and I may even get out of the car !!!!

[Kathleencd]

I was very nervous for the first half hour or so but I started to feel more confident as I realized most people took no notice of me.

[Jackie Meyer]

My first time was a week ago. I was nervous as hell. Accompanied by bffs, we went for drinks and then to a club. Dancing in heels. What else can I say. Driving home was equally amaising. My lovely long nails on the steering wheel and my dress hiked up as I made my way home. It reminded me that the feeling is exactly why Jackie is such a big part of my life.

I woke up the next morning with a feeling of contentness. I am on the right track. Just do it.

[CD_Princess1234]

The first time I went out in public was nerve racking. I waited until it was sunset. I went to a shopping plaza and went window shopping fearing to go inside. I realized at that moment many of the people around me were wrapped up in their shopping no one noticed me. This gave me confidence to go to other places. Now it's a different life. I'll go out shopping, to dinner and drinks. I haven't looked back

[Auntie]

I went out rather late on a warm September night and just drove around. I was wearing heels, pantyhose, full slip, mid calf skirt and a satin blouse. I stopped at a parking lot by a conservation area and just got out of the car and walked around for a few minutes. I wasn't in makeup and didn't have a wig so I wanted to be close to the car if somebody drove up. I'll never forget the sensation of the breeze going up my legs.

[sometimes_miss]

It was a time when I was quite depressed; I had been turned down by a girl I really wanted to go out with. After the rejection, I went home, no family there. Crossdressing was an escape from the reality of my male life at the time. So I went after my sisters closet, picking out the prettiest dress. Dressed up. Went downstairs. Stared at the front door for quite a while, heart pounding. Peeked through the windows. No one around. Not a soul. Opened the door and stepped out onto the porch. The breeze blew my hair back; my skirt too. Felt nice. I walked down the steps, two flights, all the way down to the sidewalk, looking carefully to see if anyone was around. It was mid afternoon; most were at work, younger kids not quite out of school yet. I didn't fit into my sister's shoes anymore by that point, so I was wearing white sneakers. Suddenly a car came around the turn, and I would be visible to whoever was in it. I quickly turned my face towards the hill opposite the street side of the walkway. The car sped by, no sign of anyone noticing me. But the scare had done it's work; I hurried back to the house, ran upstairs shaking, worried about what could have happened. I never went out dressed as a girl after that for a very long time. But I remember it like it was yesterday, instead of 40 years ago.

[IMJenn]

I'm actually getting ready for my first adventure in public myself. I've taken a walk in the park late at night before, but specifically avoided anywhere people would be. However this is going to be a couple friends taking me to a bar in Philly so no avoiding people there.

What I'm mostly worried about is the bathroom situation. (Well, that and making sure I have everything I need for my outfit. Suggestions?) I'm pretty sure the bathrooms will be uneventful, but I'd rather not be arrested or anything like that. Anyone familiar with Pennsylvania laws regarding this?

[stacy956]

First time i went out i was terrafied went to a town over and went to a drivethru had a short denim white flats and a cute white top my god was i shaking but the best feeling ever

[KaceyR]

I've only really dealt with bathrooms in MI and IN myself so far. Granted my situation is now "permanent" compared to when I was just CDing...

My "going out" day was las year January 15th 2014. 3mos after starting to CD. I stepped out of my apartment dressed for the first time. No small short steps..I just decided to go on and plow ahead even tho I was nervous. Although, my dressing in the end was basically making me "feel more normal" in the beginning which may have helped the process.. (Why I later did therapy and since started transitioning). With that "normal" feeling boosting a logical thought of "didn't care what others thought", it turned out great.
But that day I kind of had planned things out to start somewhat.
First, since my makeup skills were less-than-great.. I planned to get a makeover. I'd scheduled it at the MAC counter inside Lakeside mall-Macy's nearby in Sterling Heights. Only takes me a cpl mins to get there..so no time to second guess myself. So dressed in jeans, sweater top and belt..wig.. Kind of knee-high grey suede boots with Stilletos-ish heels, No makeup.. I walked into Macy's entrance. (Lady in front held the door for me.. makeover went well..cpl hours starting around 2. Time flew as Glenn there taught me about it. The other part was that the place I sat and the counter itself is right where the escalators are. Lots of people walking by. Way to be "on display" While I couldn't see (blind as a bat while I had my glasses off during it) I could hear comments and chat of people going by. Never heard anything bad. And an older mother and (I guess) daughter commented that "that's a cute gal getting made up there" as they walked by. So with all this and nothing yet negative..I contnued with the day.
Went to near nail salon and got a mani-pedi. Whether being good sales clerks or being truthful, when I brought up my CDing she thought I was a normal lady (oh and I had great feet ). Also that her uncle in Phillipines CD'ed and she'd send clothing care packages to her at times.
So still doing good (and now with red nails ) I called up and stopped by a friend's house. Should have had them take a pic.. Oh well. I had told them about my CDing..they were supportive then. So visited for a bit.
By then was about 7:30pm, and decided I needed something from the store. So went to Target.
Discovered how highly waxed floors and stiletto-heeled boots worked . Slipped and danced just a few steps in (heh). One other time in there as well but got things figured out. Got a belt and something else. Maybe a look or 2 by a guy..but nothing drastic.
Now 8-8:30 I was hungry. So went to a family restaurant. Busy there..(Friday) got sat in a booth. Spent an hour there. Possibly one noticing comment by a nearby customer but not bad/derogatory. Funny part was how many different waitresses/managers stopped by thru the time checking if everything was all right, anything needed... Think they might have noticed and word spread by the employees. Was certainly the most time I've ever been "helped" at a restaurant..

By 9:45 I was back home.
Now all thru the day I limited my water intake and such.. I didn't even attempt to use the restaurant's bathroom just in case of hassle.

So that was _my_ first day. The perfectness of that makeover kind of set the tone to allow the rest of the day to flow without worry (much..I did stall slightly before Target ). It was wonderful.
Not long from that I was in Grand Rapids visiting Billie's group.. First time clubbing By March more frequent local stuff, by April/May I was practically fulltiming when I went out except for work..July therapy, Oct started transitioning.. This Jan 1st fulltime even at work.
Lotta things can happen in a year

[kkaye]

My first day out, I did not have a problem with nerves but with my heels and walk.I felt the best place was downtown. In this town nothing turns a head downtown.No problem with nerves. I felt it was my right to do what ever, I wanted and to be the woman, I am where, I want. I dressed for me. I felt liberated and like this girl in me had been imprisoned to long.As long as, I was hiding in house, this girl was still imprisoned as, I felt. I did not feel, I would begin to live as me until, I did what, I want when, I want.It's nothing like the feel of a soft dress and panties out in a breeze.A right and an option, I appreciate and will treasure my first day out.

[Jenniferathome]

my first time out was Feb 15th, 2012. Almost a year after joining this site and telling my wife. I logged it here: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...sco&highlight=

I was remarkably calm. Once I decided to go, it just "was." Of course having two guides (Allie and Rachael) leading the way made it painless. The best part of the outing? I told my wife about it the evening and even using the ladies room. Her comment was priceless, "I hope you sat down!" She envisioned another woman seeing heels facing away from the toilet. The door went to the floor but I did sit.

[Suzanne F]

I met Allie and Rachael the second time I went out I believe. Anyway I will never forget the first time out. When my heels hit the pavement I knew I could finally breathe. I had waited all my life for that night!
Suzanne

[NaNook]

well being a Newbie to thread...I would say ,just go with it !! I have a story for ya !!
cause really no one will Mind? I found this out !!! they will but only if you allow it be yourself....
sounds easy? I know but not when that first time?? for some that have? now we can say "Oh Sure"...LOL
but its not as bad as one may think??

but me? first time I went out I was "Mortified"...LOL
2 friends we were going to meet for first time mentioned no we'll be dressed up...LOL
but was a change of plans...LOL and I was "Only One Gussied Up"....LOL
but I was at point where I was tired of it !! I "Wanted to go Out" !!
so after talking in parking lot? they still gave me some confidence? so they took me to a BAR !!
imagine? my total "First time out" and they drag me to a bar !! but it was fun!! and "No one Cared" !!!
even with my Southern Draw,no one really seemed to notice or care...LOL
well 2 Gentlemen did ? but I was just trying to get through night....LOL I did not think anyone would try and ...well you know??....LOL
but was flattering and Horrifying...LOL(even someone grabbed my Behind!) I did not know if to be pissed or Flattered as well...LOL
but even after walking out to the main street to get back to our car....(I even drove...LOL) we had a great time !!
and I wanted MORE !!!
then found a place where there were CD's wall to wall !!....almost like a "Mecca"...LOL
now to some of the few places I know here in Southern California, it's Easy...if I just act "Normal"
no one cares or minds??....like the more I tried to hide? the worse it was? if this make sense??
so just be yourself....and have fun !!!
I do and hit the dance floor all the time !!!

[Ellen2d]

I started dressing over 20 years ago. After dressing for a while I found and joined a local CD club in the Twin Cities and did attend events with them in a CD friendly environment. The first time I went out in public, in daylight no less, was after a session with a makeup expert that worked with CD's in her home. I went to her home and dressed and then she worked with me on my makeup. After I left I went to the Mall of America. It was both scary and thrilling. I"m sure I didn't fool anyone as I'm over 6 feet tall before my heels. There were a few shops in the mall that were CD friendly and I visited them. I was treated very well and allowed to try some clothes on. I did get a few looks from customers though.

[Mary Poppins]

I wish I had that type of confidence to go out to a mall. I know I would run into someone from work or acquaintances that don't know that I embrace crossdressing. The places I normally go are grocery stores, beauty salons, libraries and out for a walk. I would need like a lifeline to give me strength. I applaud your confidence.

[AccidentalDresser]

I only went out the one time in public but I guess you could say I cheated.
I went to the Sydney LGBT Mardi Gras as the Cliche French Maid.
We rented a hotel room in the CBD and I got dressed their so I wouldn't have to travel all the way in to the city from home that way.
It felt wonderful to be out amongst people who almost expected you to be dressed and looked at people who were not dressed as party poppers.
The streets were lined with French Maids, Nurses, TGirls in shiny silver dance outfits that covered barely a thing and I was amongst a group of mixed GG's & TG's dressed like Fembots from Austin Powers. It was really hard to tell who the GG's were most of the time and there were even a few drunken yahoo males who I think only put on a dress that night for the party like a second Halloween. I really didn't feel exposed or afraid of ridicule at all.
I did however duck behind people every time the TV cameras came near because it's a televised event here in Australia.

[GinFizzieLizzie]

To IMJenn:
I don't know what the law is here in Philly, but I've noticed more and more bars are going to a format of several small one-person unisex bathrooms with a lock instead of one large multi-stall bathroom each for men and women. If it's that type of configuration, then it won't matter anyway.

[Genifer Teal]

Excited beyond belief. Scared out of my mind.

I agree with the above. I share this to say don't judge the future by your first few outings. Find a support group. Make local friends. As you start to feel comfortable, you will be less nervous. Things will go much better. Push through any initial rough times. It WILL get better, MUCH BETTER.

[Krististeph]

I was much younger, my wife and I were newlyweds, more or less. I had on this ruffled skirt, black cotton, I forget the blouse... I was pretty nervous, even though we were not going out to any place- just driving around. Kat was laid back, even encouraged me to relax some. Lucky I did not get stopped for driving erratic (though i don't think i was, just nervous).

Lots of water under the bridge since then. Tips?

Use a good wig, and set it well or learn how to 'play with it' if needed. secure it well.
As much as possible, keep your elbows tucked into your waist, and your knees together.
square your shoulders somewhat
act shy, rather than scared or timid or nervous.
if you get read- so what. I'm a man, baby.
remember you are a person same as anyone else. Be yourself, don't try to over assert yourself (especially in Chicago), and just be kind.
Smile.
have an exit plan if you need it to make you feel safe.
And have a hell of a lot of fun, 30 years ago, it was a lot different. make the best of our more tolerant society as much as you can.

[Angela Marie]

I had a makeover quite a distance from my home. It was the first time for me. When the woman saw me in my dress before the session she said "wow great shape" that made me feel good. I was ecstatic beyond belief at how good I looked after the session. I went to one store on the way home so I did not interact much.

I went out a few times but I did not have good makeup or brushes. It was very quick. Just go get gas and come back. I was very very nervous.

A few months later I went for another makeover, again some distance from my home. Awesome job and I looked great. Again I visited one store and went home. I got home and was about to take the makeup off when I thought "screw this. I look great and if I am ever going to start building some confidence now is a good time" I went back out and drove to s supermarket to pick up some groceries. Was I nervous? You bet? But I looked good. Tight sweater, black tights, and heels. I felt great and empowered. After that I started buying more good quality makeup and brushes and I got much better.

So for me there were a few first times; both of which significant.

[Melissa18]

Hi Sarah
I had my first step out in in public last Tuesday night, albeit in a small country town and late at night but it was the most liberating experience of my life.
I was lucky I had two friends from here for support who were with me via messenger.
Mine was only a small step, but it was a step in the right direction, and as others have said have the support around you and you will be alright. I'm looking forward to the next step by going out to a function with friends, which I hope will be very soon
Enjoy it
Adelaide

[pamela7]

There's "public" and "public" tho, for me.
- in front of my SO, her daughter and daughter's friend - as "a man in a dress"
- my first time out the front door, into the car to drive to a CD/TG group - the drive was exciting, the group was a bit underwhelming actually
- my first time out partially dressed, in a public place, that was also fairly noneventful, quite calm
- my first time out getting made-over, trying on a wig - i'm still bemused
- my first CD/TG group meeting fully dressed with the wig on - last night - was great, I was really feeling into my female form, happy, content, lovely company
- to yet happen will be firsts in public fully dressed, in front of old friends ... scary thoughts!

[HelenR2]

Really nervous until the front door shut behind me then.... normal, even relaxed.