The best job for those transitioning

[Jennifer-GWN]

Girls;

Somewhat tongue and cheek… what’s the best job for one transitioning… it is a nice paycheck that pays the bills and provides enough to cover transition expenses and all the sundry things to go along with that and not actually needing to show up at work… yep… a paid leave as such. But that’s in dreamland and few if any of us have suddenly hit the power ball jackpot I’m guessing.



Having said that I am at a bit of a crossroads. I have a very good job with a very good large tech company and well established in my role with 20years of seniority. I am very visible to a large chunk of the organization but currently not out at work; although I have had preliminary discussions with HR on my proposed timeline and thoughts plus increasingly sending subtle clues as part of day to day activities with a hope to lessen the “surprise” factor in the future.

My crossroads is that I’ve been approached to consider 2 new roles. Like most things lots of pros and cons. Pro’s not as corporately visible to the masses but much more travel that might become stressful with respect to the cadence of “things” in process on the personal side you know the drill… regular electro, laser, blood work, dr visit, etc.



Lots to consider… I’m guessing this might be one of those times where career progress might play a secondary priority to transition. Equally I’ve been considering the potential of retirement which hasn’t been ruled out as well as an option.



Have any of you reached a similar state; especially those of you transitioning later in life? I’m 53 as a reference point.



Cheers… Jennifer

[LeaP]

The one you've got - seriously.

53? Pfffft - you're a kid!

[Jorja]

I agree - the job you already have.

If your looking for a job find one you are qualified for and apply.

A job is better than no job especially when you are transitioning.

[Jennifer-GWN]

To clarify ... In this particular situation my options are all inside existing organization vs. leaving and starting afresh.

[Jorja]

To clarify - the job you already have.

[AllieSF]

I agree with the others, if you have a good job and you had originally planned to transition in place, then to me that is the route to continue following. One of the biggest downer's and anxiety causers is the lack of adequate funds to be able to truly live one's life, with or without throwing in transitioning. You are way above the bottom level of that famous pyramid on how people progress once they take care of the bare necessities at the bottom. Why take potentially large steps backward economically if you can avoid it? Many of the woes of transitioning that I read here and when talking with others has a lot to do with the lack of funds to live above survival. You appear to be happy where you work, know the In's and Out's of the company, and are respected there. Why not stay with that, at least for the near future?

Maybe you need to discuss in more detail with HR your transition plans and how these new opportunities affect your long term goals of being yourself and at the same time how to satisfy your professional needs. If they are a progressive company and you are a valued employee, you may be surprised on how much they are willing to help you achieve both. At least it is worth a try. Changing companies and transitioning may be much harder than staying where you are. You can always transition in place maintaining, at least, your current level of income and hopefully work satisfaction and then see how it goes. Later once more or less totally transitioned with the big costs and changes (coming out to all, surgeries, etc.) behind you, you can more comfortably and securely explore other professional options as the new and documented you. If that doesn't work out, you could continue where you are at or then consider a very early retirement.

Anyway, good luck and congratulations on the new and bigger job opportunities.

[Kris Avery]

Being a field worker for a great company and also presently employed... yeah... that's about as good as it gets (at least from my point-of-view).

[Linda Z]

you need to deal with the hand that you have, not a bad one for you.

for me it is the same, be nice and enjoy the ride.

I have always controlled the employment, so I lead the group, not easy when you change, but you need to command, in both genders.

Linda

[PretzelGirl]

I am with the others. Are they absolutely saying you have to move positions and staying isn't an option? I know there might be some of us that step back for the sake of our own stress. I am in a fairly visible position at my large company. I was waiting for the other shoe to drop and for them to ask me to step to a less visible position. Instead, they threw their support behind me and started calling customers so they wouldn't be surprised at future meetings. It can be done and if you want to, tell them that you are more than capable of handling it. The point they need to know is that if you are doing the job now, you can more than do it after as you won't be changing your skill sets. The same person, same knowledge, same skills, and maybe heightened output due to your congruence.

[PaulaQ]

Yes, keep your present position. Transition is stressful enough without adding the challenge of a new job.

[Jennifer-GWN]

Point taken and lots to think about. It's good that these opportunities are in no way precipitated by my transition as to date I'm not out at work beyond a preliminary HR discussion which I'm quite sure remains in the Client/Attorney privilege space with our HR Trans advocate.

Linda Z... indeed... I've definitely "owned" most of career and this is one of those potential times where balance is important particularly from the personal side. Doing a bit of Myers Briggs review this weekend to test my assumptions from a team alignment perspective.

Sue... the company I work for is top of the class for diversity leadership and acceptance. I had lunch with my good close friend who knows me very well this week and her big question to me was "given your current role what do I think the best way to come out officially" given my profile and visibility. She's good... happy to have the girly moments while at the same time plunk something down that forces the brain into foreground processing mode. I can very easily take a big bang approach (everyone at one time) when the time is right which in part is why I've been letting the subtle clues be visible.

Choices are good and even better when they are not driven by ultimatums. Status quo is a perfectly fine option.

I love the insight and perspective here. Thanks to you all.

Cheers... Jennifer

[Eryn]

I think that a job you already have and have earned respect doing is a great advantage. I'd try to stay as close to your original job as you can.

An offer of a change might be a subtle way of moving a TG employee out. You get installed in a supposedly great new position and then suddenly the reason for that position disappears and you're left on the outside.

[Aprilrain]

Exactly what is a "subtle clue" that one is transitioning in the near future? I can't help but picture Bruce Jenner, it's painfully obvious he's transitioning despite his inability to actually come out and say it. Or if your talking "actual subtle" than people will just think your going through a mid-life crisis or are gay or both. There is no way to ease in a bombshell like "hey guys I'm becoming a woman" clear nail polish, slightly plucked eyebrows and "light" make up, on casual Friday, are only going to tip off the women that you are either gay or very 'er... "Eccentric"

[Kimberly Kael]

I transitioned on the job and when I decided to move on, every single offer I got was from a company where someone involved knew the "before" me. Unless you're looking for an entry-level position somewhere it's probably not helpful to cut ties completely with your past life. I'd also suggest that your first few years following your transition are likely to be the most awkward. It's extremely helpful to have a solid reputation where you're transitioning to weather some of the inevitable storms.

[Eringirl]

Hey GF...been thinking a lot about this....

My worth??? You really like what you are doing now. There is no pressure to make a change, i.e. you don't HAVE to take it. You are really comfortable with how things are going. I know you like a challenge and change is good sometimes. You have a lot of pieces on the move right now, so question is, how many balls do you what to have in the air at one time? Likelihood that some other new opportunities will come up in the future once you are FT at work? I suspect there will be given your reputation in the organization and talents. Just my take on it.

Chat soon.

Erin

[Jennifer-GWN]

Erin; ah the voice of reason and practicality. You're right that opportunities; although not a dime a dozen, but in our dynamic world they do exist.

Yes I do have a good deal on my plate at the moment and would be very happy to progress to the point where I was comfortable enough to take the final step and come out at work full time. Thinking about that today and my voice is that final piece. So back to daily studying as for me to take that step I need need to be vocally there... None of that in between nonsense. My annology for this is skiing... I was a good skier but it took a long time to "feel" how to get the skies to actually carve a turn. I'm not not carving the turn yet.

Cheers... Jennifer

[Ann Louise]

Local, state or federal government (with insurance), in a union if possible, with management and an HR department that are at least ostensibly trans-friendly. Too good to be true? I had that, and retired immediately after my GRS, and yes, I feel overwhelming gratitude for all those that made this possible ^_^