why do some folks get bored of CD-ing after a few days?

[Natalie cupcake]

My male life needs me so I have to go back. But Natalie is always there in some way.

[Dena]

I'm not bored with it. It's just easier to not dress so much.

Actually, the decline of my dressing is due to a profusion of body hair. I have not found a satisfactory solution. I should try waxing, as I cannot abide body stubble. Body hair stubble just might be a "cure" for crossdressing!

[pamela7]

If you're an in-home cross dresser I suspect social isolation will take over. I am assuming if you've been en femme 24/7 since mid January you may be more than a simple cross dresser. You've been out among the populace: work, church, shopping, social interaction?

Mostly in-home, in-garden, but also more subtly going out to meetings, shopping, hospital, social interaction, mostly as man-in-a-dress. The whole-hog like ladies mostly find, needs special occasions to take the hours to get ready. There's not a great difference in manual labouring clothes m/f so the gardening may as well be in male mode on the outside.

Social isolation - being a hermit that's not really a problem, but I'm out and about sufficiently ambiguously or less attention-drawing to get away with it here. It's about helping my SO with her boundaries on where I go dressed.

Yes the thrill fades as such, but no the inner happiness does not. If I'm a fem in a male body then great, but no need for SRS or hormones, this does it. I feel i'm simply embodying the fem side of me that's had 54 years exclusion, so maybe the next 54 years will balance me out!

[Marcelle]

Hi Pamela,

As many said, I think it really depends where you are on the spectrum and how you go about "getting your femme" on. I truly believe we all at some point push the boundaries of dressing and come to that saturation point where it is difficult to stay "girl" and retreat back to the comfort of "boy" unless you are truly TS then living as a woman full time is an imperative for that person as they are a woman (they want nothing to do with their guy side). For most of us who water closer to the CD side of the spectrum we are still "men" under all the female trappings and while we identify "female" when dressed (well some of us that is, not all) we still have our guy side and we like that side as much as we like our girl side. That guy side still needs to be seen and experience life as much as our "girl" side. So we find balance as many have here. It might be dressing in private one day a week and never going out or it might be dressing "en femme" a predominate portion of the time, or points in between. Once we find our saturation point, we back off (might include a purge for some) but it always comes back and this could be cyclical until equilibrium is found.

Once that equilibrium is found, you will notice those girls tend to stick around and rarely talk about purging, quitting or giving it up.

Hugs

Isha

[Katey888]

Pamela - I would have thought that you might have realised even in the couple of months you've been here the great variety of behaviours and underlying motivations we all exhibit and so trying to explain why this is different for many of us is virtually impossible. For example...

apart from a couple of hours here or there I've been en-femme since mid-january, there's no sign of this slowing down or me becoming bored of it, or me wanting some "man time", I'm happier this way, and that's that!

It's great that you're happy with how you can present, but your definition of 'en-femme' would not be mine or likely many others here. You've said you underdressed for many years, only recently going 'fully femme'. But you've also indicated that you present as 'man dressed as woman'.... womens clothes but no wig, no makeup - and what many others may consider a more androgynous look, although that's obviously subjective. So we're all quite different in what we like to do and what we think is acceptable (I'd probably never go out in jeans and boots and certainly not without a full facial and wig) so it shouldn't be surprising that many of us both like our male side and actually enjoy being Mr Jacket & Chinos, as I have been today (but I was interviewing job candidates so felt it right to leave the jeans at home... ).

Let me stress that isn't judgmental of you, but for me emphasises once again that while I find it hard to understand why you and others should present the way you choose, I still also find it difficult to understand myself and why I would want to and could go from jacket and chinos to ball gown and feather boa... and that sort of brings me to the futility of asking why any of us have our own patterns of behaviour... It is what it is for each of us...

Katey x

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Here's a different take on your question.

If you had to describe who you are, where on the list would 'crossdresser' appear? No.1? I doubt it, yet you do it almost all the time- you probably spend more time doing it than any other single activity except breathing and loving Wg.

So does that invalidate it? Obviously not... it just means that since January you've been wearing women's clothes. For a 50-something that's a drop in the gnat's bucket. If you're still dressing en femme 23/7 in a year's time, I shall be surprised; I think you're a person who throws himself into things whole heartedly, be it gardening, career, commitment to Welshgurgle, dieting, you name it. But presumably even you can't keep all those balls in the air at the same time indefinitely?

I reckon next year could see a sudden passion for hang-gliding, or trombone, or indeed World Domination. I look forward to finding out.

Nikki

[pamela7]

... and that sort of brings me to the futility of asking why any of us have our own patterns of behaviour... It is what it is for each of us...

Katey x

Yes, thank you Katie, it might be futile but i was interested in the answer - our variety is our spice - well, one of them! I do love the wig times too, probably I'm deliberately pushing boundaries being an inbetweener as is my way, those low-cut fronts with a full rug come to mind! At present I'm indulging in long-forbidden fruit, who indeed knows what lies in store for the future.

Nikki, as someone who lives in the moment, next year is way beyond my horizons. I've converted a couple of guys from work to CD-ing; guys with no prior history. "Viva la revolucion." Trombone - hmmn, no, world domination - now there's a thought! [The Two Ronnies: "the worm that turned.]

[Jessie James]

Wow, I'd love to have a few days of being fully 'dressed' to test this theory. I don't think I would get bored, at least in regards to dressing.

Jessie~☆

[Dana44]

Ah, never had the chance to do it for more than a couple days. I wonder if I would get board with it. Naw!

[FrancineS]

NEVER gets boring for me. When it feels like it is that's when I change styles be it wardrobe hair etc, keeps Francine evolving.

[Kirsty Louise]

I cant say that I get board but some times I have to have a change, say if I’m going to a football match or to the pub with the lads

Kirsty x

[bridget thronton]

I suspect part of the answer is that dressing up is hard work (women do not dress up every day they have other demands on their time - family, jobs, friends, hobbies)

[Jane-C]

Over exposed. You can have too much of a good thing. Well that’s the way I see it. When we deprived no matter what the reason we want to climb the walls out of frustration not been able to dress but when we get a chance to dress 24/7 for a week or so it becomes dull. Just my 2 cents
J

[Annaliese]

Except for a wig, I am dress fem every day, could not go back, love my girl jeans I wear to work, and my cowgirl boot, in less you look close you can not tell them apart form cowboy boot. Not even trying to hide that I wear make up, or my bra straps. For me this is who I am, I am happier, it not about getting bored, for me it just dressing for who I am.

[Cheryl T]

Beats me why !
It's been darn near 60 years for me and I have no intention of slowing down. There's never a dull moment for this gal and I will not let this part of me go, ever again.

[carahawkwind]

I don't get bored with it, but I do find it kind of exhausting after a while sometimes. Most the time though, it's simply of matter of needing to take care of things I'm more comfortable doing as my everyday male self.

[pamela7]

So today I did go out - to the dentist - with a normal shirt on top (a man-shirt) - to spare the dentist any "worries". Walking around town I felt myself going into gorilla mode. Once home it was comfy enough, its a nice soft shirt, but could I keep it on? No, I'm just happier dressed. I wonder what lies underneath this emotional sense?

[jeank]

Pamela,

One of the things joining this site has given me is the opportunity to explore and question why I like to dress pretty (a term that came from a post I read - can't remember which one).

And I think that has helped me to define what it is that I enjoy - I like being pretty occasionally. I definitely try and look female, possibly because I have never yet seen a male I regard as pretty in the way I define it.

But it's great to put on make up, paint my nails, don a wig, wear a nice dress and elegant heels, and with it comes acting in a female way for a while -sometimes a couple of days. It's a wonderful escape. I think I envy women being able to do that in our culture where it's difficult for me to as a man. And they only do it for special occasions.

It's something I like to do occasionally. It's not that I get bored with it so much as it's a time slot I had that I've filled, and thoroughly enjoyed. Yes there is a compulsion to do it, but in a couple of days I've "scratched the itch". Then other things that I want to do beckon and I need to move on. Until the next time.

Reading your posts this is not where you are, which may explain your difficulty in understanding it. It sounds as though you are much more in the middle of genders than I am. As much as I like to present myself as female as possible, I never feel more than a guy in a frock, scratching his strange itch, and enjoying the elegance and "painted-ladyness" I see in a mirror.

I don't understand why I have this strange itch I have to scratch - frankly I don't really care - it's something that just is, but I certainly have no desire to be like that full time. When I'm not scratching the itch, I'm a casually dressed guy who doesn't really pay much attention to appearance.

We're all different - as I said in a post on another topic the other day - probably the only thing we really all have in common is a love of wearing dresses.

Jean

[Sweet Paulina]

Wow, this is a great thread
I can relate to the 'getting bored with it'
I sometimes have the opportunity to spend a whole day or a few days almost entirely en femme
To be truthful, it's actually a lot of work
Even genetic females don't do their high event type makeup all the time
I guess I'm kind of an all or nothing type person
If I can't do it completely then I won't
And there is, obviously the times that I need to 'man up' lol to get my work done
But, given the opportunity I would and could stay in full femme mode for several days
After that, my male side gets lonely

I'm really glad to have found this site to be able to read all of you other people's viewpoints

[cheryl reeves]

i balance both sides as best as i can. me and my wife have very little privacy for me to fully dress,so i wear nitegowns which is as much as the other members tolerate. i mainly wear jeans and t shirts any way like most around here do.

[Ellie52]

I do get bored with it sometimes. after spending a few days en fem and sometimes after a few hours i get bored. I sure love the prep and the first steps out the door but it seems after some time boredom sets in. It seems it is after all the things I can do while dressed have been done. Going to the mall, shopping, seeing a move, maybe getting a bite to eat all these things are fun but after I have done them it seems that clothing just doesn't matter. I will say that one of the thrills of doing all those things is seeing my enfemme reflection in a window or a mirror, that never gets old.
I have lately taken to going for long walks in the park and they even get boring after a bit. Maybe it is because no one notices or cares if they do notice. Clubbing is always fun having fun with other girls is a kick also. I guess it is the boredom of every day life that bores me when I am dressed ofr course it can bore me in guy mode too.

I have to agree 100% with this. I get bored after a couple of hours and change back into DRAB. My wife doesnt care what I wear as long as our son (who is 22) doesnt see. So any time were on our own I can dress up in whatever I like and as this post stated - All it takes is a look in the mirror once the makeup is on and I feel great. The problem is I hate taking makeup off so I wear less and less these days.
I have been to the Mall etc etc etc and it doesnt do much for me. In fact I feel silly so dont do that anymore.
I class it more as a hobby. Like making a piece of furniture or playing the guitar. I dont mean to trivialise it but thats what its like for me. If im making furniture I get bored with that after a few hours and put the tools away - its the same thing.

Ellie

[Maria 60]

I will say for myself I choose the closet. Once dressed and ready, the question is, ready for what? The doors are locked and the window blinds are closed so one could say I reached a dead end and at that point I am limited to what I could do. I do some male chores and cleaning dressed but then sooner or later I have to go outside to throw some garbage out or get a tool. That's when the boredom comes in because I just can't sit around dressed all day, so usually after a few hours I get undressed. I guess that's the price I pay when I decided I want to stay in the closet.

[Tracy Hazel Lee]

A little extreme, but a funny quote that I feel applies to me for certain things... Mostly because I have recognized that I can be quite addicted to certain activities that I find fun or exciting, and as such, takes an extreme overload of it for me to get tired or bored with it, if ever. At least for the things that I really enjoy doing. Dressing is one of those activities. I NEVER grow tired of doing it, and I do it QUITE frequently (like at least 4 times a week, if not more) This is my gauge of how to identify what it is I truly enjoy doing... Looking back at my own history of events and counting up the amount of times I find myself doing those same activities. It is no coincidence that the ones that are at the top of my list are the same things I absolutely love doing. Why else would I do them so often?

For the people that grow tired of the frequency and/or duration of dressing; I feel that their needs for dressing are simply not as strong as mine, or they simply prioritize other aspects of their lives differently than myself. They can extract just as much satisfaction from dressing that I do, they just don't need to have it so often to be satisfied. Everyone has different levels of fulfillment, and the requirement to fill that need. For many people, doing it once in a while is more than enough to satisfy the desire. I don't see anything wrong or weird about that. That's what they need, and they get it when they need it.

[Tina_gm]

i think you're onto something there Stephanie, and Gendermutt's thread answers that ... a feminine man enjoying the feminine clothing, but able to go into man-mode when required by the world around

man mode requires most of my time of the life I have built. In all actuality, I have no actual female mode, just deeper connection with my femininity. That is basically how and why I dress. I never get bored with it, or feel it is time to stop. I also never feel a burning desire either. When the opportunities arise I take them usually.... Even when I don't, I do not feel a big difference in myself. female clothing is never unappealing, but occasionally for whatever reason not appealing enough to change. (not often mind you)

When I change back, it is not a bad feeling. I could stay dressed longer but my life in front of me needs me in male clothes, so I change. I am quite particular about my male clothes btw, although I do not blend or mix with them,

I will say this, I so often envy my wife and women in particular for their amount of choices of how they can present themselves. There are times though when being a guy and throwing on a shirt and pants quick without anything else to do is nice....