I haven't posted anything for a while, but I actually went to Victoria's Secret and bought a pair of thigh highs yesterday, and, in spite of the potential complications to my life, I feel great about it. I hadn't shopped for anything in a long time, and I have not had any fem clothes since my girlfriend moved in with me.
Fast recap - I was in a latency period (didn't want to dress at all) when she moved in about 2 1/2 years ago. I've made some jokes from time to time, but she has made it clear that crossdressing is something she would never accept. Over the past 6 months or so, my desires to dress have come screaming back. We have also been having relationship issues for a while now, some rather serious, and serious enough to make me wonder if I want to continue.
Okay, end of relationship talk. I got my stockings. I haven't put them one yet, as I had about a grand total of 15 minutes yesterday to do so and I want to savor it. What struck me the most about the experience was how nervous I was not. While I still did the "getting these for my girlfriend" thing, it felt more like a natural thing than anything else. Oh, and I'd forgotten how flippin' great VS smells
Now they are hidden, and I'm really not worried about getting caught. At least not as worried as I probably should be. Lately I have felt that before I never completely embraced my fem side, but now feel like I really want to dive in all the way. Finances and circumstances are in the way right now, but rather than feeling frantic or stressed about it, I have a zen-like calm about it. Buying a pair of stocking has made me feel better than I have in a while, and I'm still working on the implications of that.
I'm looking forward to wearing the stockings Monday when I know I'll have time. I really wanted to share this, and typing this out helps to organize my thoughts a bit. I have limited opportunity to reply to any posts over the weekend, but I'll definitely update as I can.
I really, really can't wait to put those on, though!